Small? Just act tall

Height is might, or so it says on all those fantastically bright Cherifer boxes.

To some extent, this line holds a lot of merit. The power to tower over beings smaller than yourself is nothing short of god-like, and the added bonus of inducing insecurity among most vertically-challenged Filipinos is just too good to pass up. More often than not, being tall comes with a set of sociological advantages that can be equated to “getting more out of life.” It’s true; I’ve looked through some statistics, and the pros of being taller are awesome. Consider some of these from sedona.com:

• For each inch in height, a person earned about $789 more in pay, per year, according to a study in the Journal of Applied Psychology.

• Taller men are more likely to be married and have children than shorter men, according to a study in Nature.

• During a speed-dating event, for every 2.5 centimeters taller a man is than his peers, the number of women who want to meet him goes up by about five percent, according to University of Essex researchers.

• When asked to rate the qualities of men of varying heights, men and women rated short men as less mature, less positive, less secure, less masculine, less successful, less capable, less confident and less outgoing than taller men, according to research by psychologists Leslie Martel and Henry Biller.

Though these numbers pertain more to men than to women, I think it’s safe to say that women are still susceptible to heightism (height discrimination) — if not as dramatically as men. In any case, it all boils down to this: while tall people are marked out for greatness and world-domination… short people are destined to loveless, low-paying lives of quiet and lonely beer nights.

Now this bothers me, particularly since the Philippines isn’t exactly known for its abundance of long-legged citizens. In fact, the average height for guys is around 5’4”, and around 4’11” for ladies. I know, I know; everything is relative and all that jazz — but come on, compared with the rest of the world (excluding fellow vertically-challenged Southeast Asians), we are pint-sized. The only way we can possibly take over the world is by relying on our army of far-reaching, globally-posted OFWs, though even that’s unlikely, what with the recession and all. And so, either we wait for the geniuses behind the chlorella growth factor to start mass-distributing their products for free — or, we start not caring about being generally smaller than the rest of the world, statistics be damned.

Obviously, I’m lying about the manifest destiny that comes with being tall or short. One’s success in life isn’t determined by the extent of his/her height… it just boosts the chances considerably. Especially if you’re one of the many less-than-statutory job hunters straddling the Philippine poverty line. 

Two weeks ago I was able to talk with some TESDA alums, one of whom was a computer programming graduate named Leri. She was 21 years old, less than five feet tall, and thin as a bamboo reed. Suffice it to say, she looked as though she were 12. While relaying the woes of still being unable to find a job, Leri was very vocal about her height being a constant frustration to her search. And truly, some of the points she raised really got me thinking (hence this article). Take our country’s dependency on height requirements, for instance. While imposing a limit for safety-related purposes (amusement park rides and the like) is perfectly fine, is it really necessary to have girls be at least five-foot-four to work the cash register? Seriously, what difference does it make? Putting a height requirement on sales-related employment is crazy; as is putting one on all the other jobs where one’s height isn’t a do-or-die factor. Cosmetic reasons, my ass. That excuse should only be valid if one was grooming his/her employees to strut the fashion runway — and even then I’d still contest the requirement for that. In any case, those who come up with these impositions should consider following the lead of our military, who’ve just recently decided to change their height requirement in favor of slightly shorter, yet more technically competent, soldiers. And I think Leri, who studied computer programming for the better part of two months, would be more than capable working as a cashier compared to taller applicants who may just turn out to be grossly inefficient.

Until then, what can the myriads of short, unemployed, and discriminated Filipinos do? They can laugh at the dangers tall people face, such as overhanging branches and tiny doorways; or they can wait for our leaders to try and pass a bill regarding height requirements (seriously). That aside, short people can rule, too. For lack of a better example, let us look to President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo. Not even five feet tall, yet look how high she’s risen. (Er, on second thought, maybe it’s better to put a height requirement for would-be leaders of the country… you know, just in case.)

But really, height is not necessarily might. Forget the saying that tall trees catch more wind — they’re the ones who topple first when the wind blows too strong anyway.