Baking it or faking it

Learn from Brigitte Bardot. The pouty nymph of Roger Vadim’s And God Created Woman turned- wrinkled homophobic escargot is a walking and cringe-worthy reminder of sunny delilahs.

Now whoever said summering is low maintenance sure isn’t doing summering right. Aside from sartorial concerns and finally saying goodbye to board shorts as cover-ups , one must look into the right things to slather and spritz.

Tanning is serious business. From getting the right hue to minimizing damage while maximizing fun there is a formula that beach bitches should follow. Think of it as like roasting a turkey (now lets not get insecure here I’m talking about the process) you need to know how to marinate, baste and bake yourself with the perfection of a five Michelin star chef.

Baste and marinate: Prepping your skin for the big bake is not to be neglected. Don’t be like me and forget that a fake tan does not make for a base tan. A base tan is something you build up carefully and gradually . It’s extremely helpful to know that an SPF 2 causes more trouble than good to skin that has not built a natural sun protection barrier. When facing Apollo’s nemesis for the first time be sure that your skin is well-exfoliated and protected. Arsenal should be nothing less than an SPF 15.

To try:

Clarins Eau Dynamisante exfoliating body wash boasts of beads that are gentle enough to scrub rigor mortis skin cells away and leaves a refreshing scent that is citrusy enough to ban the bugs and welcome the hugs.

Murad Environmental Shield with SPF 15 Self Tanner for Face and Body: There is nothing more unattractive than a pasty white body romping around. Let this protective self-tanner give you the right hue while keeping the sun’s nips at bay. When using it at the beach, be sure to reapply often as this formulation is not waterproof at all!