Thai beaches, shopping & ladyboys, oh boy!

From the movies I’ve seen, there were three things I was absolute ly sure I would encounter in my  first visit to Thailand: beaches, shopping, and ladyboys. However, because of the sudden onset of floods that killed nearly 600 in the country last year, I was also pretty certain that I would encounter my share of filthy, disease-filled floodwaters. As it turned out, my first three expectations were met beyond doubt, and thankfully, my fourth was nowhere to be found. Rather than encountering chaos and suffering, I was met with a country that persisted in moving forward, all while maintaining the cheery disposition that it is known for the world over. Most importantly, everything was clean and dry.

Eight Things To Do In Pattaya

1. Have dinner at Rimpa Lapin (also known as Rim Pha La Tin) during sunset. The best dining spot is in the back of the restaurant where you have a great view of the entire strip of Golden Beach. Must-orders are the deep-fried sea bass, curry crab, steamed rock lobster, shrimp and prawns, and the fried rice with crab.

2. Try eating in a hole-in-the-wall — restaurant, that is! Suan Pha Nu Seafood serves the best deep-fried shrimp pancakes, deep-fried crabmeat pancakes, deep-fried mackarel with soy topping, and spicy tom yam soup with seafood. And if they have an entertainer performing on that night, you can even get up for a little impromptu karaoke session.

The entrance to the Pattaya Floating Market. Though it’s built on top of water, mosquitoes don’t seem to be a problem here.

3. If you still have room for more food, I highly recommend eating kaotang natang. A highly addicting appetizer made of rice crispies served with a peanut, mint, and pork sauce, kaotang natang, is best washed down with a cold glass of Thai tea, which is milk tea made with condensed milk. I tried these at Tamnanthai in Central Festival Mall. Other must-orders are the roti with green curry and chicken, tom ka gai (a kind of soup with chicken), pad thai (traditional Thai noodles), khai yadsai (prawns with stuffing), and khai joew (Thai omelette).

4. Shop at the Pattaya Floating Market. Offering the best of Thai snacks and delicacies, al fresco dining, along with various souvenir knick-knacks, there are several vendors on boats selling various types of fresh food and such. Since it’s open-air, the best time to go would be afternoon to avoid the heat. If you plan to bring home some Thai delicacies as pasalubong, the best choices can be had at a mere 20 baht per item.

5. Pray at the Sanctuary of Truth, a wooden architectural wonder that has been in construction since Aug. 13, 1981. What is most unique about the structure is that every bit of the temple has been hand-carved intricately using iron wood and red wood and put in place by the temple’s 271 workers. Unlike most constructions, they don’t use nails to hold everything together. Instead, they employ unique sliding techniques, like lap joints, butterfly joints, tongue and groove, and dove tail connections to hold every bit of wood together. Observe a conservative dress code when visiting this site and make sure your legs and arms are covered.

6. Have your photo taken at Silver Lake, a vineyard owned by one of Thailand’s most popular movie stars that features several landscape areas that are great for photo-ops. It’s almost as if the landscape artists took scenes from Alice in Wonderland and recreated them using shrubs, flowers, and trees. It’s a little hot, though, so make sure to grab a cup of ice-cold grape juice on your way out.

7. Get a “Thai elephant massage” at Nong Nooch Tropical Garden. Owned and named after a wealthy Thai couple with a penchant for gardening, they also offer a cultural show and a highly entertaining elephant show. Tip: If you want to get and a little personal with the elephants, volunteer during the elephant show and lie flat on the ground while an elephant prods you with its foot to give you a “Thai elephant massage.”

Commissioned by a businessman who passed away 10 years ago, every bit of the Sanctuary of Truth has been painstakingly hand-carved using iron wood and red wood.

8. Meet the ladyboys! In a PG setting, of course. Staging three shows every night for the last 33 years, with tours around Asia, Russia and London, Tiffany’s offers an hour and 20 minutes of world-class entertainment. If you want an extra souvenir, have your photo taken with the performers after — just make sure to have 20 to 40 baht ready for each one you have a photo with because they won’t be shy to ask you for your tip!

Accommodations: Garden Cliff Resort and Spa is one of the finest resorts located in North Pattaya with direct access to a private beach. It is also located a minute’s walk away from Wongamat Beach, one of the more famous beaches in Pattaya.

Garden Cliff Resort and Spa is located at 220/21 Moo 5 Pattaya-Naklua road Soi Naklua 16, T. Naklua, A. Banglamung, Chonburi 20150; tel. no. 038-259333.

Eight Things To Do In Bangkok

1. Visit the Temple of the Emerald Buddha at the Grand Palace. Established in 1782, it consists not only of the royal residences and throne halls, but also a number of government offices, and the renowned temple where the King of Thailand himself changes the robes of the Emerald Buddha four times a year. Since Thais hold the grounds of the Grand Palace sacred, dress conservatively. If you’re caught dressed inappropriately, you can always rent Thai sarongs and loose pants as cover-ups outside.

2. Watch the Siam Niramit show, which features a stage certified by the Guinness Book of World Records as the largest and highest in the world, housed right inside a 2,000-seat theater. The show is broken down into three parts: Journey Back into History: The Ancient Kingdom of Lanna, Journey Beyond Imagination: Blissful Heaven, and Journey Through Joyous Festivals Loy Krathong. Famed as one of the largest stage productions with 150 performers (the count doesn’t include the animals involved in the show, like the elephants) and 500 costumes, it also makes use of grand set design and state of the art technology.

The second part of the show is Journey Beyond Imagination: Blissful Heaven. This part features some of the most elaborate set designs and costumes in the show.

3. Visit the stars at Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum. Located at Siam Discovery Mall, you can take photos to your heart’s content with wax reincarnations of various historical figures, like Princess Diana and Mahatma Ghandi; world leaders, like President Obama in the Oval Office; sports superstars like David Beckham, and Venus and Serena Williams; Hollywood celebrities, like Brad and Angelina, Oprah, George Clooney, and the list goes on.

4. Experience traditional Thai food in Bangkok at the Erawan Tea Room — absolutely no fusion cuisine here. Located on the 2nd level of the Erawan Bangkok mall, they traditional Thai food complemented by refreshing beverages in a beautifully appointed semi-casual setting. With a rich, classic decor, internationally acclaimed designer Tony Chi has revived the nostalgic atmosphere of a bygone era in a Tearoom whose panoramic windows overlook the fascinating Erawan Shrine.

5. Brave the sidewalk food vendors that pop up along the streets at night. There you’ll find plenty of popular Thai food on the cheap. Locals and frequent tourists will vouch for the safety of Bangkok’s street food, which would go down well with the local beer. While you’re at it, why not do a bit of shopping on the side? There are several stalls hawking everything from shoes to souvenirs manned by vendors who are willing to bargain for good prices.

6. Had a bit too much Thai food? Lay off the spices for a while and refresh your palette with a contemporary home-cooked Italian lunch or dinner at Biscotti in the Four Seasons. On weekdays, they offer a business set lunch menu that includes a choice of two to three courses and comes with their popular antipasti buffet. The à la carte dinner menu offers popular Italian fare, including pizza, pasta and seafood; wines are available by the glass.

That’s me on my first elephant ride with writer Carmencita Sioson!

7. If you’ve had enough of Chatuchak, peruse the dizzying amount of choices at the Platinum Fashion Mall, which features two buildings for shopping. Platinum 1 features mostly clothing and cosmetics, while Platinum 2 offers several floors of shoes and bags. Take note that Thais have petite builds and vendors do not usually allow shoppers to try on the merchandise, so resist impulse buys! Also, if you are a US shoe size 7, you’re more likely to be a size 9 in Thailand.

8. A few blocks down, you’ll discover Pantip Plaza, an IT haven featuring six floors of every technological gadget conceivable, along with their corresponding accessories. Like any bargain hunting trip, it’s best to go in the morning because Thais also believe in buena mano, and are more likely to give good prices during this time.

Accommodations: Grand Hyatt Erawan Bangkok is a premier deluxe business hotel with resort-style facilities and is strategically located right in the heart of Bangkok. The hotel is close to one of Bangkok’s most important landmarks, the Erawan Shrine. It is also located in the business, diplomatic and commercial district and conveniently situated between SkyTrain stations on both lines with a Sky Bridge link to adjacent buildings and is just 45 minutes from Bangkok International Airport.

Grand Hyatt Erawan Bangkok is located at 494 Rajdamri Road, Bangkok 10330; tel. no. 022-54 1234. For more information, e-mail them at bangkok.bangh@hyatt.com or visit bangkok.grand.hyatt.com.

• As of press time, the rule of thumb from baht to peso is 1 baht for 1.5 pesos. $1 is equivalent to 32 baht.

The beautifully appointed rooms at Cliff Garden Resort and Spa offer a fantastic view of the seaside.

• The annual grand sale in Thailand will be from June 15 to Aug. 15. All shopping malls and districts will be offering huge discounts on various merchandise during this period.

• Purchases of 2,000 baht and up in a single store are eligible for VAT exemption. Simply ask for the form in the store and present it at the airport to receive your rebate.

• To avoid getting lost in translation, simply download the Speak Thai App on your iPhone or the iSpeech Translator on your Blackberry or Android phone.

• Thais are very polite people, so they end nearly all of their phrases with either “kaa” or “krup.” “Kaa” is used by women, while “krup” is used by men.

• Three phrases that I used most frequently were: “Sawadee kaa,” a traditional Thai greeting; “Kob kun kaa,” meaning “Thank you;” and “Nee tao rai kaa?” which is “How much?” The first two phrases are usually accompanied by the action of putting your palms together and bowing your head.