'Everyone is Gay': YS looks at the 'Beckiness' of Society

MANILA, Philippines - Kurt Cobain’s words may have proved prophetic, when he made his generalization in the Nirvana anthem All Apologies. Whether this staunch “honorary gay” was trying to piss off homophobes during his time or he was confirming that he “could be bisexual” (as he told The Advocate in an interview), 17 years later, there is some truth to the line that “everyone is gay.”

Today — more than ever — there is “gayness” in all of us as reflected in modern culture. The Filipino language, for instance, has effortlessly embraced gay lingo. “Becky” humor has entered the mainstream and has become part of our everyday lives. Now, local comedians like John Lapuz and Vice Ganda are reaping the harvest by landing lead roles in major-outfit movies. In Hollywood, nobody cares if the actor playing Barney Stinson (whom every straight man wants to be) on How I Met Your Mother is gay. Neil Patrick Harris is that good at playing straight roles. “The public eye has always been kind to me, and until recently I have been able to live a pretty normal life... So, rather than ignore those who choose to publish their opinions without actually talking to me, I am happy to dispel any rumors or misconceptions and am quite proud to say that I am a very content gay man living my life to the fullest,” he told People magazine in 2006. To put it simply, Harris is for gay men what Ellen Degeneres is for lesbians.

Smells like gay spirit: Kurt Cobain wishes he were gay, “just to piss off homophobes.”

And while True Blood introduced the first gay vampire on television, Archie Comics — after almost 70 years of existence — recently debuted its first openly gay character, “a blonde named Kevin Keller” who was first seen in Veronica Comics No. 202 according to The Washington Post. “The introduction of Kevin is just about keeping the world of Archie Comics current and inclusive. Archie’s hometown of Riverdale has always been a safe world for everyone. It just makes sense to have an openly gay character in Archie comic books,” Archie co-CEO Jon Goldwater tells the US newspaper.

Betty vs Veronica vs Kevin? There’s a new blond in Rivendale and he’s grabbing the spotlight.

Bisexuality, on the other hand, tends to be an even bigger topic for debate than homosexuality. There’s a somewhat accepted prejudice among homosexuals and even heterosexuals that being bisexual is a stage of denial and that they don’t “exist.” But however you look at it, there is an evolving open-mindedness in youth culture — a perspective that does not label people according to sexual orientation. “Yes, I’ve kissed men and women. Does that make me bisexual?” some of us might wonder. The answer is this: you are not obliged to pigeonhole yourself. But you don’t just open up and explore your sexuality only because you can (like the way the sexually provocative character Tony Stonem lived in the UK teen drama Skins), but because you know who you really are. Givenchy designer Riccardo Tisci showed this new kind of diversity when he chose his former assistant, transgender model Lea T, to become his new muse. Lea T continues to appear in major fashion projects including a nude photo in French Vogue, a cover shoot for Lurve magazine and various global campaigns. She could pave the way for transgender people in high fashion.

Love for drag: Lea T, today’s hottest transgender, graces the cover of fashion magazine, Lurve.

But there is always the other side of the coin: homophobia. “Kids are coming out younger, but are schools ready to handle the complex issues of identity and sexuality?” author Ramin Setoodeh writes in Newsweek in July 2008. “At 15, Lawrence King was small — 5 feet 1 inch — but very hard to miss. In January, he started to show up for class... decked out in women’s accessories... But on the morning of Feb. 12, Larry left his glitter and his heels at home. He came to school dressed like any other boy: tennis shoes, baggy pants...” Setoodeh narrates. It was the day when his classmate, Brandon McInerney, pulled out a handgun, “aimed at Larry’s head and fired a single shot.” Larry died in the hospital after two days. Glee may have been inspired by Larry’s tragedy when the “Neanderthal bully,” played by Max Adler, threatens to kill Kurt in the hit musical series. Off-camera, Adler joins other celebrities like Eve, Kesha, Zachary Quinto, among others, in the viral YouTube campaign It Gets Better, where they condemn bullying of LGBT people. A movement for equality is gradually building. John Schwartz, moreover, reports in The New York Times that there are college fairs “devoted to recruiting gay students.” “The more I can help my institution be open to diversity of all different kinds... it’s just going to make us a stronger university, and it’s going to make our student body be more robust,” an admissions executive tells Schwartz.

The advocate: Glee bully Max Adler supports “It Gets Better” campaign in time for his controversial episode on the hit TV series.

We can all admit that there are considerable, if not remarkable, changes in our notions about being gay and in how these perspectives continue to influence our culture. There are heterosexuals who are gradually opening their minds to individuality in sexual orientation. Some straight people, however, are tolerant but do not accept the gay lifestyle, saying “I’m okay with gay people, but not if one comes from my family... not in my clan.” We can spend all day rationalizing about the morality or immorality of same-sex attraction. But really, what if it happens to you? Imagine going through puberty and having that uncontrollable instinct towards the same sex — something you cannot explain or eliminate. Will you pretend to be someone whom you are not? Now, imagine a society that values genuine respect.

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E-mail me at acarlovelasco@gmail.com and tell me what you think.