Going back to the prom

Who can honestly say that they enjoyed their prom the first time around? It’s not surprising that more people say they didn’t than did. After all, it was right smack in the middle of the awkward phase of adolescence when we weren’t entirely sure what kind of person we wanted to be and were therefore slightly withdrawn and more self-conscious. Not to mention, fashion choices were not always on the money and many a girl I know has looked back with horror at the bouffant chiffon gown or that cream monstrosity that had more beads sewn into it than your grandmother’s wedding veil (yes, I’m describing a dress I myself have worn!).

Honestly I think it’s normal that a lot of people aren’t as comfortable as they can be at the prom the first time around. It is a rite of passage, after all, so you naturally look forward to it and, along with all your friends, hype it up in your minds until your expectations of the evening far outweigh your desire to simply have fun and enjoy yourselves. You get caught up in finding the right outfit, the right hairstyle and, of course, the right date and all of this gets twisted and tangled in your mind until you’ve come to expect so much that nothing can live up to your expectations. I think I was a victim of this in high school. After all, due to the hype both in the movies and television every girl imagines her prom night will be a night of romance and magic and fairy dust and that she and her date will dance that beautiful last dance to a soft, sweet, slow song and float off into the heavens. Okay, I exaggerate a bit but I know I’m not far off the mark.

As for me, I personally did not enjoy the prom experience at all when I was in high school. Adding to the fact that I looked like a creampuff (seriously), there was no possibility of a Pretty in Pink moment as I went with someone I wasn’t really hoping to have a relationship with. Furthermore we didn’t really have a lot in common which made parts of the evening agonizingly long and painful. The Senior Ball was a little better but still no magic sparks as I had learned from the prior year’s mistakes and opted to go with a buddy instead of a romantic prospect. This made the night fun but not particularly exciting — and though I was spared from the creampuff look my hair was still quite a disaster area. If I recall correctly I burned all those photos, erasing all evidence of my love for the frizzy look! In essence, while some girls may have had the magical prom experience, I was not one of them.

And yet, who knew that over 10 years later I would have a chance to relive that terrible night, this time in a great dress with a hairstyle that said sleek Zhang Ziyi instead of fourth member of The Supremes, far more confidence, and the ideal dream date! Yup, not many girls are lucky enough to relive their prom experience but I did last weekend when I was asked to host the Assumption High School Junior’s Night at my high school alma mater. I already handle the drama club there (that alone was like a blast from the past) and when my fabulous students (I’m biased and I know it!) asked me to host their evening I was more than happy to say yes and redo my prom the right way!

And yes, last week I experienced prom as I believe it was meant to be. I wasn’t harassed or worried or concerned about how my dress looked or if it made me look fat (okay, maybe this concerned me a little) but this time around I relaxed as I got ready. I did my own hair and makeup and I didn’t stress myself out about how I looked at all. And I wasn’t stressing over whether my date and I would have anything to talk about. As I had roped my boyfriend into hosting with me I was actually going back to my high school prom with my very own dream date and I was already so comfortable with him that all we did was have fun and laugh.

And yet, at the same time, in almost oxymoronic fashion, even though this time around the prom was comfortable and fun, it was romantic and exciting, too. I believe the age of 27 is when I finally got pixie dust and fairytales. And even though I didn’t kill myself over my look, I did put in extra effort to try look pretty for my date who equally took my breath away in his handsome suit and purple tie. I have to say the fun I had holding his hand at the dance put all those Pretty in Pink moments to shame.

So it may have taken over 10 years to get it right, but I finally got the prom memories I wanted. And I think I had to be this age and be with this boy to have finally gotten it the way I always wanted it. God does give us second chances… if we’re open to them. And life truly does mature us as we age and we come to marry real expectations with those that are reel. For example, this time around my perfect evening didn’t end with that last dance… nope, it went right on to a kiss and adobo flakes! Now that’s real life!