Wanted: True friends
July 24, 2002 | 12:00am
No. A friend doesn’t necessarily have to be one who loans you exorbitant amounts of money whenever you ask for it. Neither does a friend have to be one who lends you his car all the time. If you ask for a hook up with a cute girl, the person who does hook you up all the time doesn’t automatically become your friend. All of the above are just facades to what friends truly are. But don’t get me wrong. These can all be part of what a friend to you and me might be. All of it, however, would have to depend on the person underneath it all; the money, cars, girls, and other values of the flesh would just be "bonuses?" I guess.
The dictionary defines a friend as: "1. One who is personally well known by oneself and for whom one has warm regard or affection; intimate. 2. One with whom one is on speaking terms; an associate or acquaintance." Now these are very technical definitions, and they attack the word "friend" from a different angle. So, now that I (with assistance from my handy-dandy dictionary) have told you all about what a friend is, take two or three seconds to give your own definition of what a friend is to you.
It took me two-and-a-half seconds to press the enter button so that I could start a new paragraph and in that short time span, a whole myriad of thoughts rushed into my head regarding who and what friends are to me. So here we go. First, I thought about the definition the dictionary gave, and told myself, "No way man. Not even the mighty dictionary can define such a word." When I say define, I mean it can’t really capture what friends and friendship are to me. I believe this because friends aren’t just acquaintances or associates. You don’t just have warm regard and affection/intimacy for friends. It’s a completely different thing. Friends are more than that. What friends share is something that is not tangible, and cannot be explained by mere words. To me, my friends are part of who I am now. They each have contributed to how I’ve turned out, and I’m sure that they still have more contributions to make because these people are my friends for life. They know me, I know them, and we can all relate to one another, whether it is by means of some "universal language of friendship" (which I must say can prove to be a very interesting medium of communication sometimes), or just because of "normal" conversation (which doesn’t always have to comply with the given definition of the word "normal"), or just because we all "click," which is the case most of the time.
People who shower you with material things all the time are not necessarily your friends. Neither are those who are sneaky social climbers, who pretend to be your friends. Friendship goes beyond the material things and stuff like popularity, and being "da bomb" wherever you go. You can’t put a price on friendship, because first of all, friendship cannot be bought. Friends don’t come in sealed boxes that say: "CAUTION: CHOKING HAZARD. Not suitable for children three years old or younger." Friendship is definitely more than that. It must be cherished. It is a bond that can be shared in the same way all the time, and under any circumstance. Most importantly, it comes naturally, and everyone is comfortable in every way.
It might be hard to tell who your real friends are at first, because it’s not like every day is a holiday with the people around you. You and others will have the occasional spat, and an argument here and there, but deep down inside, you know that it’ll all be fixed in due time, and that these minor trivialities only make your friendship stronger. Once you consider someone to be your friend, that’s it; both of you would know that no matter what, you will stay friends, as long as you are alive.
One special thing about friends is how you grow with them. Some of them have been around forever, whether they are your neighbors or they were schoolmates. It is through this that you and your friends create a bond that cannot be broken because it is solidified through time, as well as the experiences the both of you share/d. I share this with you because many of my friends have either graduated (as they were already high school seniors) and are going abroad for college, or need to accompany their families in moving to another country. It saddens me to know that they won’t be there in the coming year, but I know that it’s okay, because they’re still my friends, and nothing can change that.
Friends will also stay the same, no matter where in the world you all end up. One or two might end up in the US, others in Canada, another two in Norway, but it doesn’t matter. You all share the same friendship, and nothing can best this otherwise. Aside from this, all friends know that "goodbye" never really is what it sounds like because we now have the wonder of e-mail and short messaging, so you really never lose contact with your friends. Also, these things keep you and your friends up to date with each other, and ready for the next time you all decide to meet up once again. I know that no matter how far away some people may be, it doesn’t change a thing when you’re friends.
Sometimes, we take our friends for granted. We get comfortable in the knowledge that they will always be there, and that there is no need to pay great attention to those who will perpetually be around. Until it’s too late, that is. That’s why I’m emphasizing the value of true friendship. And those out there who "ride my wave" will realize that friends are more than just people you hang out with, and have a good time with. Inside you, you can find traces of each of your friends, and it is inside you that your true friends live.
Author’s Note: This article goes out to Kat and Kiko Aquino who are off to Norway to spread the beauty of "Horend!"
The dictionary defines a friend as: "1. One who is personally well known by oneself and for whom one has warm regard or affection; intimate. 2. One with whom one is on speaking terms; an associate or acquaintance." Now these are very technical definitions, and they attack the word "friend" from a different angle. So, now that I (with assistance from my handy-dandy dictionary) have told you all about what a friend is, take two or three seconds to give your own definition of what a friend is to you.
It took me two-and-a-half seconds to press the enter button so that I could start a new paragraph and in that short time span, a whole myriad of thoughts rushed into my head regarding who and what friends are to me. So here we go. First, I thought about the definition the dictionary gave, and told myself, "No way man. Not even the mighty dictionary can define such a word." When I say define, I mean it can’t really capture what friends and friendship are to me. I believe this because friends aren’t just acquaintances or associates. You don’t just have warm regard and affection/intimacy for friends. It’s a completely different thing. Friends are more than that. What friends share is something that is not tangible, and cannot be explained by mere words. To me, my friends are part of who I am now. They each have contributed to how I’ve turned out, and I’m sure that they still have more contributions to make because these people are my friends for life. They know me, I know them, and we can all relate to one another, whether it is by means of some "universal language of friendship" (which I must say can prove to be a very interesting medium of communication sometimes), or just because of "normal" conversation (which doesn’t always have to comply with the given definition of the word "normal"), or just because we all "click," which is the case most of the time.
People who shower you with material things all the time are not necessarily your friends. Neither are those who are sneaky social climbers, who pretend to be your friends. Friendship goes beyond the material things and stuff like popularity, and being "da bomb" wherever you go. You can’t put a price on friendship, because first of all, friendship cannot be bought. Friends don’t come in sealed boxes that say: "CAUTION: CHOKING HAZARD. Not suitable for children three years old or younger." Friendship is definitely more than that. It must be cherished. It is a bond that can be shared in the same way all the time, and under any circumstance. Most importantly, it comes naturally, and everyone is comfortable in every way.
It might be hard to tell who your real friends are at first, because it’s not like every day is a holiday with the people around you. You and others will have the occasional spat, and an argument here and there, but deep down inside, you know that it’ll all be fixed in due time, and that these minor trivialities only make your friendship stronger. Once you consider someone to be your friend, that’s it; both of you would know that no matter what, you will stay friends, as long as you are alive.
One special thing about friends is how you grow with them. Some of them have been around forever, whether they are your neighbors or they were schoolmates. It is through this that you and your friends create a bond that cannot be broken because it is solidified through time, as well as the experiences the both of you share/d. I share this with you because many of my friends have either graduated (as they were already high school seniors) and are going abroad for college, or need to accompany their families in moving to another country. It saddens me to know that they won’t be there in the coming year, but I know that it’s okay, because they’re still my friends, and nothing can change that.
Friends will also stay the same, no matter where in the world you all end up. One or two might end up in the US, others in Canada, another two in Norway, but it doesn’t matter. You all share the same friendship, and nothing can best this otherwise. Aside from this, all friends know that "goodbye" never really is what it sounds like because we now have the wonder of e-mail and short messaging, so you really never lose contact with your friends. Also, these things keep you and your friends up to date with each other, and ready for the next time you all decide to meet up once again. I know that no matter how far away some people may be, it doesn’t change a thing when you’re friends.
Sometimes, we take our friends for granted. We get comfortable in the knowledge that they will always be there, and that there is no need to pay great attention to those who will perpetually be around. Until it’s too late, that is. That’s why I’m emphasizing the value of true friendship. And those out there who "ride my wave" will realize that friends are more than just people you hang out with, and have a good time with. Inside you, you can find traces of each of your friends, and it is inside you that your true friends live.
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