Philosophy 101

You know those kids who’ve always been sure of what they’ve wanted to be since they were five years old and had no trouble whatsoever filling out those college application forms? Well, I’m not one of those kids. When I was a young girl, I wanted to be a doctor like almost every other young child. Then I started reading those kid magazines and watching kid reporters on those early Saturday morning kid TV shows and thought, that’s what I want to be, a journalist. I had it all planned out. I’d take journalism at Diliman, work for some local news station before heading off to CNN and making my mark as a world famous reporter, try anchoring for a couple of years, then say goodbye to the crazy ferocious realm of news reporting and maybe take over the Oprah empire and do my own talk show that touches everyone’s lives so profoundly that I gain celebrity status overnight and start accepting lucrative offers to star in numerous grand films, after which I can’t take the fame anymore that I finally retire. Sounded like a good plan. Then I saw City of Angels, and went back to my earlier dream of becoming a doctor, where I’d profoundly touch everyone’s lives that I gain celebrity status overnight for my perseverance and compassion that every producer on the planet wants to make me into a living documentary and make a few movies of my life story, after which I become so famous and retire after forty or so years following the exhaustion from all the fame and glory in my name alone. Sounded like a good plan as well.

Then came the era when primetime television was dominated by shows like Law and Order, Ally McBeal and The Practice. These were the images I recall that made me think of the legal profession as entirely redeeming and cruisy. The lifestyle that came with it wasn’t too bad either, like when after a court victory, Ally McBeal and all her other lawyer friends would go out to the local bar and sing their hearts out. (What was more surprising I’m not too sure - that they could sing, or that outside the office, they actually had social lives.) I figured law could always be an alternative.

Going to college, a passage that many of us take for granted, was such a wonderful opportunity. I was ecstatic at graduating into a position where I could be in control of my choices instead of having to choose from options that were already chosen for me. I wanted to do all those liberal arts courses whose categorization sounded exactly that - they were liberating. Such courses that appealed to me were comparative literature, philosophy, art history, sociology, anthropology, and classical studies. But I would hear a voice at the back of my head, I don’t know if it was my parents’ or if it was my own, telling me that a bachelor of arts degree wouldn’t get me very far in this life, in this money-driven society. I enrolled at UP as a freshman philosophy major anyway, and justified myself by affirming that I would do law later on. Some people told me it was a good move, that I’d find philosophy useful on my way to law school, but more people seemed baffled by this choice of study. They never questioned it outright, and they didn’t have to. Some of the things they implied was how philosophy was good only if I was going to teach that course as a university lecturer, or go on to law school and apply these argument and analysis skills. You see, coming from a close knit extended family, as most Filipinos are, with dozens of aunts, uncles and cousins (as well as their friends and family), most of the criticisms, constructive or not, comes from kin. Most of my relatives’ education consisted of such professional and straightforward courses as business, management, marketing, engineering, accounting and medicine, none of which interested me very much (or at least not anymore). When asked about what I’m studying in college to which I reply "philosophy", I often get this I-feel-sorry-for-your-future look, but when I add that I’m taking it as a pre-law discipline, they immediately give me this You-make-me-proud smile. Not that it mattered to me what anyone thought.

There weren’t that many of us in that batch doing philosophy. At most, there were probably only twenty of us. Compare that to the hundreds of freshmen doing commerce and administration, the sciences, business management, forestry, engineering, information systems, and communications. Every now and then, I’d imagine that studying in such a science research and mathematics oriented campus such as that in Los Baños, philosophy was never really deemed as a high-profile all-important career path. Certainly, this is not a fact, but in a sea of high school valedictorians, child prodigies and remarkable professors, one can feel quite insecure. Even with my roommates who were doing biology and communications, I felt that philosophy wasn’t as legitimate a course as theirs. I mean, all the business majors were going to go off and take over Makati, the communications majors were off to change the face of society, and the biology majors were off to make a difference. And the philosophy majors? Well, they better go on straight to law school, or they’ll just serve themselves useless in the real world!

While in college, whenever I met someone for the first time, trying to acquaint myself with that person and finding some common ground, the conversation usually always started with "So what are you doing?" pertaining to the course or major one took, to which that person answered and then asked, probably more out of courtesy than curiosity, "And you?". I wish I could find a better way to open up a conversation than that, but somehow, it always works more often than not, and thankfully the conversation goes from a few nods and polite smiles to animated talks and strong opinions about world peace or nuclear missiles (well, sometimes). That’s usually how it is, too, on first day of classes, or group and club orientations. In those instances, when asked to introduce ourselves, we generally did so by our course of study. Hi, I’m Dianne and I’m doing so and so. And since that was the main thing we based our new acquaintances upon, we instantly came up with stereotypes (mostly out of boredom I guess), like that all math and physics majors are mad scientists, or that those doing computer science are technology geeks, and that those who are into biology and natural sciences are exceptional high-IQ geniuses. (In turn, maybe they saw us philosophy majors as a confused bunch of people, I don’t know!) It’s as if we were what we did.

Of course, this is far from the truth, and I’m sure many of us don’t hold stereotypical views of our classmates founded on the subjects that they’re doing (and we shouldn’t). Although sometimes, on first impressions, I conceived of that classmate in PE who wanted to be a business tycoon as a competent and crafty young fellow, and that young woman in my dorm who wanted to be a doctor as an upright human being with a heart of gold. For all I know, he could have been a timid lamb who was incapable of making his own resolutions, while she could have just been a bitch. I also met the kind of people I’ve always known existed, and I suppose, envied a bit. You know, the ones who’ve always been sure of what they wanted in life. But I also met another group of people, the kind I’ve always known existed alongside, and I suppose, didn’t envy much. You know, the ones whose choices were already made for them.

I became friends with one of those people. She was a sharp young accounting major in her third year of college. She had only a semester to go before finally walking up that stage and soon into the much-anticipated real world. If all went well, she would be graduating with honors, and her parents would fly down from the U.S. to see her take that diploma as a symbol of her achievement and hard work. Sounds great right? Except for one tiny detail. She hates accounting, and even though she’s managed to get over the fact that she detests her course for the past three years, it’s definitely not something she wants to do for the remainder of her life. She’d much rather do psychology, something her parents had earlier convinced her that unless she practiced in the U.S., would lead to nothing except perhaps a stint as a school counsellor where she’d listen to some spoiled brat’s materialistic problems. Her parents, who incidentally, both hold BA degrees, told her it was either she took an accounting degree, or she’d just have to support her own education.

I understand how expensive it is in today’s times to get through college. And I understand that because of the money aspect of it, you might as well work towards a degree that you can exhibit some place other than your living room wall. This, I reckon is presumably one of the main deciding factors in a person’s choice of study. Also, since it’s usually our parents who are the ones bearing the financial cargo that comes with a good college education, most people are compelled to do whatever course their parents decide for them. Still, it isn’t all that bad. Parents naturally just want the best for their child by choosing courses that carry some sort of certainty for the future in one way or another. After all, what can go wrong with a med. school graduate? Besides, a lot of people, when suddenly faced with such decisions, don’t really know what they want, so their parents stepping in and making that choice for them can be at best, a relief.

I’m not saying that we should let ourselves be dictated by our parents, even though they are the ones who make it possible for us to even step foot into college. We’re the youth of the nation, the future of society - have a backbone for goodness’ sake! Do whatever interests you, whatever tickles your fancy! But neither am I suggesting that you drop your psychology course in favor of your childhood passion, paleontology, nor that if you despise math and just can’t get along with it, drop mechanical engineering and do music instead. It pays to be sensible. It pays to know what you want, and what you want out of it. You could save yourself a lot of time just with that. And every so often, it pays to listen to your parents too, even just a little bit. They just might have some advice worth taking. Weigh your options and look at all the possibilities in equal light. This is four years of your life we’re talking about here, not your parents’, not your relatives’, not your friends’. But just so we’re on the same page here, it doesn’t follow that whatever constitutes your four years in college is ultimately what’s going to decide your future. For example, just because you’re doing geology now doesn’t mean you’re bound to be a geologist for life, and only a geologist. I once took an information systems subject where the head professor of the course, an impressive proficient lecturer indeed, was a geology graduate. And I should add that having a diploma to add to your credentials doesn’t make you any better than someone who doesn’t. Thomas Edison didn’t go to college, but hey, I wonder who invented that light bulb you’re switching on right now.

In a society where education is a crucial determinant, it helps that you plan ahead. Also, if you’re going to spend the years from graduation till retirement applying that college education, it might as well be something you enjoy doing. Sure, accounting sounds like a great career move, but it is something you’d want to do for the rest of your life? Think about it, while it’s not yet too late. It’s your time, it’s your life. Your choice counts too, you know.

I’m glad I did philosophy. This sounds rather cheesy and I admit, a little absurd, but I don’t know what I would have been now as a person if I hadn’t taken that course. It’s changed the way I see things, the way I think, the way I look at life. (Why not take it as an elective next semester?) Sure enough, it has certainly helped me with my law studies too. As for that matter, I still sometimes wonder if law is something I really want to get into. I had better, or else all the late-night-early-dawn essay writing sessions, hours spent reading big heavy books with a font size of 5, and drive exerted going over countless case studies and interpretations would have all been a vain attempt! Only, I do enjoy the challenge that law imparts, and I do take pride in knowing that I’m working hard towards something. As I flicker through law-centered TV shows, movies (ever seen Legally Blonde?) and re-runs of the now defunct Ally McBeal (which had a phenomenal five-year reign on primetime television), I grin at how the portrayal of the industry is heightened and glamorized, and most of the time, unrealistic. I realize that most lawyers don’t really go out to a bar after hours and sing. I realize that after a long day’s work, the last thing they want to do is vocalize - they just want to get their worn-out sleep-deprived selves home to bed. And I also realize that in the middle of a trial, if you even try quoting that "You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!" line, the judge would probably tell you to cut out the drama and just answer the darn question!

Are influences as superficial as primetime legal television shows reason enough? Did I take law simply because it was the next best logical thing to do? Or did I take it because I can really see myself, years from now, being happy in this profession? Maybe this thing I have for law will wear out in a couple of years, I’ll never know. Maybe somewhere along my four years of law school, something life changing will happen to me, I’ll never know. Maybe when the results of my exams come out at the end of the month, I’ll be notified that I failed them all and I’ve been officially kicked out of law school, that’s certainly possible. Maybe, just maybe, I’d graduate, then work for a firm for a couple of years before starting my own, where I’d fight only on the good side and bring justice to thousands, and because of that, I’d touch everyone’s lives so profoundly that I gain celebrity status overnight for my integrity and my ardent campaign against evil that every producer on the planet wants to make me into a living documentary and make a few movies of my life story, which I all graciously decline one after the other, after which, just for fun, I walk into a bar and sing my lungs out, which a music producer notices and offers me a multi-million dollar contract, and at this point I’m tired of turning down offers so much that I accept this bid, after which I become the next Alicia Keys, becoming so famous that I retire after twenty or so years following the exhaustion from all the fame and glory in my name alone. I’ll never know.

Either that or I’ll just send up being a corrupt lawyer, taking bribes here and there, and finally ending up in prison, (although in the Philippines, I seriously doubt I’ll ever get caught, but still) you never know.

Email the author at diannababy@hotmail.com.