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Sunday Lifestyle

No Regrets

- An Autobiography by Mary H. Prieto -
When we arrived in Manila, we went straight to my in-laws’ house. My mother-in-law didn’t recognize me. She said, "Hello, Morita." She mistook me for Morita Roces. I corrected her and she said I was so dark that she had not recognized me.

Then my other in-laws came around and we got reacquainted. They were some of the kindest people I had ever known. Papa Tony (Antonio Legarda Prieto) was charming and a thorough gentleman, and my mother-in-law was the sweetest and most considerate person ever. My sister-in-law Teresa was a beautiful girl whom I still had to get acquainted with. I also had a brother-in-law, Antonio Prieto Jr., whose nickname was Caruso, because he cried so much when he was a baby. Later on, he married Rosemarie Miranda.

I was expecting my child soon. My mother-in-law Rosario Prieto, whom I called Mama Cho, had gotten together the most beautiful baby layette she could. In a beribboned basket were diapers, little shirts and jackets, booties, caps and everything a child would need or want. Everything was handmade, embroidered and initialled. Apparently, the lady who made those things was quite famous for it and she was also the one who prepared the layette, Doña Mary Esteban. I was thrilled no end.

Manila was not completely liberated. There was still a lot of sniping going on. One could hear the gunshots, especially at night. There was no electricity, and things were not as yet normalized. During this time, many American officers were coming around visiting Teresa and the whole family. Actually, they were homesick and eager to speak English with people. Everytime they came, they presented us with chocolates, nylons, Elizabeth Arden cologne and other nice things. Teresa asked some of the officers to please try and turn on our electricity. They answered they would see what they could do.

About two weeks after our arrival from the province, I started having pains. We picked up my bag, which had already been packed, and went to the hospital nearby. We were living on Aguado St., practically in front of Malacañang and quite nearby the Singian Clinic. The pains went on for several hours and then stopped. I waited for two more days but the pains did not come back. Apparently it was a false alarm. I was terribly embarrassed and went home.

About a week later the pains started again, but this time I felt that it would be another false alarm. I was timing the pains, and Leo went upstairs to get Teresa. She came down and was trying to put on my dressing gown but I couldn’t even stand anymore because of the pain. So I lay back in bed and started screaming. Fortunately Leo’s uncle, Dr. Enrique Lopez who was staying upstairs, was a leading gynecologist in Manila. He came down and told me to close my mouth for the flies would get in. Leo was running back and forth getting hot water. Next door where the Roceses were staying, someone was shouting "Thief, ladron." And to top it all, the dog next door in Leo’s auntie’s house was also giving birth! Thank God the electricity came on for the first time. I finally brought forth my baby girl with no anaesthesia, no tranquilizer or anything. Then several stitches had to be made, which was done with an ordinary needle and thread. Our daughter was a tiny thing. She weighed less than five pounds. Meanwhile all the neighbors gathered in our sala and dining room and were drinking coffee as if nothing had happened.

After some days I was up and about. I was feeding the baby and in a few months she had put on at least 10 pounds.
Enterprising Leo Sells Soap
Mama Cho was a wonder at getting things done. Before I knew it, she had produced a Chinese amah for the baby. In those days, the amahs were the best care anyone could have for a child. They disciplined the baby until he or she had a fixed routine. Everything ran like clockwork from morning till night. After breakfast a bath, then lying in the crib or being out in the sun, then feeding, sleeping, changing clothes, going out for a walk, feeding then sleeping again. When the baby was still small, it wasn’t too difficult except for eternally changing the diapers. But when she was about one-year-old, it became a hassle. I remember that whenever it was the amah’s day off, it was Teresa and I who took care of Mary Lou, and when it came to bathtime we had to put on bathing suits because Mary Lou loved taking a bath and would splash and splash until everything was wet, including us. We breathed a sigh of relief when the amah came back. But, of course, all of this had a price. The amah was being paid P300 monthly by my mother-in-law. My husband was making only P200. Offices were still closed, and there were no jobs of any kind available. When some of our soldier friends came over, they sometimes came in trucks, on their way to make a delivery or dump something somewhere. One time they came by and had a truckload of rejected laundry soap. They asked us if we wanted it. I didn’t know what we could do with it. But Leo looked at it for a while and then said yes, and added that we would take all they could give us. I was surprised and wondered what he was going to do with it. Well, after they left, he told me he was going to have the stuff put in an empty room. We lived downstairs, and cleaned the soap and sold it! Well, he really was an enterprising person. He would spend the day scraping and cleaning the soap and sell it to the neighbors. But in the evening his hands would end up raw and I had to apply hand lotion constantly. This work garnered him P200 more or less a month. Not even enough to pay an amah.

And so the days passed. Mary Lou was the apple of everyone’s eye. Many of our relatives lived in the same area. So they would come over and shower her with presents, clothes, and even jewelry. She was the first grandchild and all the Prietos doted on her. Mary Lou was a good and happy baby, always smiling. My second child, Miguel or "Mike," soon came and the amah took care of him, too.

When Mary Lou was about two years old, one day she had a temperature which rose to 38 Fahrenheit. This is really not too high especially for a child. I was watching her when all of a sudden she went completely limp and her eyes rolled back. She looked like she was dead. I started screaming, not knowing what to do. Then my mother-in-law came, saw her and carried her. She was pleading to God not to take Mary Lou and I was following her around crying. Dr. Mandu Legarda lived very close by and soon reached the house. He gave her an injection and she came to. This same thing would recur for the next four years. Every time she started a fever we would go to the hospital. One time the doctor had to sit up with her because he was afraid she would swallow her tongue. Needless to say, Leo and I went through a terrible agony those four years. We never found out what the cause of those spells was. One doctor ventured to say that perhaps her nervous system was not yet stabilized.
A Lady Named Conching Sunico
One afternoon I was sitting in our living room and somebody, a lady, came in looking for Mary Prieto. I told her that it was I. She identified herself as Conching Sunico. She said that she was organizing a fashion show, and would like Teresa to participate in it too. So I called Teresa and Conching explained to her. She added that the affair was going to be for charity, so we gave our consent. Afterwards we ordered our gowns from the States and had fun doing the show. That incident was the beginning of my becoming a society girl.

Meanwhile, Mama Cho was discovered to have a malignant tumor. In those days if you had cancer, it was like being given a death sentence. She had an operation and obviously they had successfully removed all of the tumor.
A Malignant Lump?
I was about six months pregnant with my third baby, when upon examining my breasts I felt a lump in my right breast. My heart skipped a beat and I knew that I must see a doctor right away. So the next day Leo and I went. The doctor said that a biopsy was needed. So they took a biopsy and I would know the result in a few days. On the day that we were to know the result, I was fearful and worried as to what the doctor would tell me. He told us the worst – the biopsy was malignant. As they could not operate, on account of my pregnancy, they would give me radium applications starting the next day. When we went home and I saw my two children playing, I could not help but cry. I felt that I would not be around to see them grow up. I went to the hospital to start the radium applications, they piled thick rubber mats on my stomach so as to protect the baby. When I had finished the 21 applications of radium, my breast was blackened and atrophied.

Two months later my baby boy, named Leo Jr., was born. The poor child was born weak and under-nourished. For one whole year my child was between life and death, as I could not breastfeed him. The formula we gave him would make him sick everytime we added more milk. And when his first little teeth came out, they were as black as coal. Today Leo Jr., through his own efforts, has built himself up from sickly scrawny kid, to a physically strong and fit person. I am very proud of him.
And Then There Were Three
My third boy, Antonio or "Tony," was born big and healthy. He gave us no trouble at all and seldom cried. He was as sweet as he could be. As he grew he became very affectionate and went with me wherever I went. As he was my youngest, I kinda spoiled him. I was always hugging and kissing him. One time I had guests and he came up to me to ask permission for something. I made him sit beside me and I started hugging him. I guess I sort of embarrassed him and he nudged me and said, "Not now, later." Another time it was morning and I was on the telephone, he started tugging my dress, and asking to speak to me. I finally finished and he said, "Mommy, Egypt committed suicide." Egypt was a cocker spaniel we had. I asked where and he led me to the terrace. Sure enough, the dog was hanging on the side where he had jumped with the chain around his neck. He had broken so many chains we had put on him, that the last one we used was big so he could not break it. It never occurred to me that he would jump. I should have known better.

And so my son grew into manhood still as sweet and affectionate as could be.
Wrong Diagnosis
After five years had passed since I had been diagnosed as having a malignant growth, the doctor called Leo and me to speak to us. We went and he announced that there had been a mistake in the laboratory and I did not have cancer. I was relieved but at the same time indignant. After all that I and my son had gone through. I have always wondered what happened to the other person who was told that their specimen was benign.

Next Week: Into The Fashion And Social Scene
* * *
No part of this autobiography may be used in any form without permission from Mary H. Prieto.

BABY

CAME

CENTER

LEO

MAMA CHO

MARY LOU

ONE

TERESA

WENT

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