Honor thy father

MANILA, Philippines – Kanye West’s self-proclaimed “best album of all time” is about to drop in less than two weeks. Since the announcement, Kanye’s been undeniably busy, regularly dropping fire and launching Twitter beefs with the ex of an ex. The high road is about as appealing to Kanye West as humble pie, so there may be a risk that he’s fallen off and has not actually completed his new album “Waves,” the album formerly known as “Swish” formerly known as “So Help Me God.” Our theory is that in its place will stand a series of dad raps filled with his newfound fatherly woes. Will they be just as lit? We’ll let you decide. And no, Kylie was not here. 

I Am A Dad

? (Intro) ?I am a dad ?I am a dad ?I am a dad

(Hook) ?I am a dad

Hurry up with my damn massage

Hurt my back helping North collage

Get the Porsche out the damn garage?

I am a dad

Even though I’m a man of dad

My whole life in the hands of dad

So y’all better quit playing with dad

(Verse 1)? Soon as your kids like you make ‘em unlike you

Cause khakis and Tod’s is so unlike you?

The only rapper compared to Michael

So here’s a few Jordan colorways in youth size 2

And here’s a list of dogs who might bite you

And I don’t even wanna hear ‘bout what n*ggas might do

Put a tracker in North’s phone till she’s in high school?

Until her college say her thesis is due

Pink-ass polos with a f***ing backpack

Make sure the school lunches got a f***in’ snackpack

Kindergarten had no swag, man,

kids with onesies out the sale rack

Saint got Pyrex, Don C snapback?Ivan, diamond, Chi-town shining?

Worried bout nature’s future with this change of climate?

Hop in this b*tch and get the same thing I’m in

Dad until the day I get struck by lightning??

I am a dad

So hurry up with my damn massage

In a French-ass restaurant

Hurry up with my damn croissants

I am a dad

I am a dad ?

I am a dad??

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

(Outro: Justin Vernon) Ain’t no way I’m giving up. I’m a dad.

Flashing Lights

Flashing lights, lights

Flashing lights lights

Flashing lights, lights

Flashing lights, lights

(Kanye): She believe in shootin’ stars,? but she off to school to design cars?

Wood floors in the new apartment

Can’t believe Nori’s in college

Saint more loves to sculpt sh*t, I’m more of the trips to Florida?

Order the hors d’ouerves, views of the water??

Straight from the page of your favorite author?

And the weather so breezy,? man, why can’t life always be this easy?

Saint in the corner applying to RISD,?

I get a call like where are you, Yeezy?

Try to hit you with a “Oh you’re choppy”?

Till I get flashed by the paparazzi??

Damn, these n**gas got me, ?I hate these n**gas more than the Nazis.

(Dwele): ?As I recall, I know you love to show off?

But I never thought that you would take it this far?

What do I know? Flashing lights, lights?

What do I know? Flashing lights, lights???

(Kanye): Nori, You know it’s been a while,? Sweetheart, we hardly talk, you out there doing yo’ thing?

I was thinking maybay baybay,? a-bay late-ly you been all on my brain

And if somebody would’ve told me a month ago?

Empty nest would suck, yo, I wouldn’t wanna know

If somebody would’ve told me a year ago?

it’d go, get this difficult?

Feeling like Katrina with no FEMA??

Like Martin with no Gina?

First class with the seat back I still see y’a?ll in my past, you on the other side of the glass??

Of my memory’s museum, ?

I’m just saying,

Hey, Mona Lisa,? come home you before you max out your Visa.

Gold Digger

Nori, I ain’t sayin’ be a gold digger,

But better not be messin’ with these broke brokes

Now, I ain’t sayin be a gold digger

But don’t be messin with these broke brokes,

Make plans, girl, go head make plans

Make plans, girl, financial plans

Make plans, girl, go head make plans

Make plans, girl, retirement plans

Make plans, girl, go head.

Think you cutie the bomb

Going to the beauty salon

With a baby Louis Vuitton

Under your underarm

But you already rock

You already got charm

Need to get savings on lock

Before you get some charms for your arm

I know you know the one

From Margiela

My psychic told me you copped PS4 and a Beemer,

Bring your own drinks and just pay for corkage,

And I gotta say buy your house in cash f**k a mortgage

Okay, then have kids, but when they get they friends

Don’t pull up in a Benz or they all get up in

Then they all want to dine and then you gon’ pay

You know why??Having children will cost ya

From what I heard future tuition’s a busta

My best friend say it’s best to start a saving culture

While you still young so I learn to trust ya.

Nori, I ain’t sayin’ be a gold digger

But better not be messin’ with these broke brokes

Now, I ain’t sayin’ be a gold digger

But don’t be messin’ with these broke brokes,

Make plans, girl, go head make plans

Make plans, girl, financial plans

Make plans, girl, go head make plans

Make plans, girl, retirement plans

Make plans, girl, go head.