Dear Prom Kid

Dear Prom Kid,

We’re sure you have your outfit ready for your big night. If not, relax. You can borrow an outfit from your older sibling and have it altered — or if you really want to, sure, go to Power Plant and treat yo’ self. But be cautious of overspending. If your prom committee is not willing to spend that much on your prom, then you shouldn’t spend too much on your prom outfit. That’s lesson number one. Have you asked that girl/guy you like yet? If yes, great, but again, be cautious. The worst thing you can do is inviting someone who’ll say yes, only to back out on the eve of prom. True story. It actually happened to one of us — and we’ve already said too much. If you didn’t succeed in bringing the date you wanted, go to Mercury Drug and buy yourself a chill pill or that thing John Lloyd Cruz keeps endorsing. It’s only prom. It’s not your wedding day. Odds are, you probably won’t be with your prom date after three years or even three weeks (which is still longer than some marriages nowadays). It’s always a safe bet to bring a friend to prom rather than a potential hook-up. That’s not to say that your friend can’t be a potential hook-up but just don’t expect, okay?

Speaking of expectations, keep them reasonably low or if possible, non-existent. In case you haven’t figured it out, you aren’t Zac Efron/Vanessa Hudgens and your life isn’t a high school movie. Don’t expect prom to be the greatest experience of your life that you’ll tell your children about for eight seasons until it seems like you’re just dragging everyone along and we all just start to hate you, Ted Mosby! Really, prom is nothing more than a glorified soiree; only prom has a lot more adults who wished they were at home watching Suits. So don’t get mad if your date isn’t funny enough or if the band is awful, because they’re all pretty much thinking the same about you.

Don’t get drunk before or during prom. That’s for the after party. As much as you want to impress everyone that you’re a big boy/girl who likes to drink his/her share of Johnnie Walker, everyone will be too busy pretending to have fun to care, and you’ll just end up as the subject of next week’s “Did you hear what (your name) did?” Speaking of the after party, make sure you go to the right one. People cooler than us have said that the after party is actually the real prom. Choosing the right after party is basically where all your friends will be, whether it’s in the hottest club in The Fort or your rich friend’s house in Forbes, or in that most rare of occasions: your rich friend’s hot club in The Fort. Also, if you tell your date that the after party is “in your pants,” you will get punched in the face. Twice. If we haven’t said it enough, basically, relax. It’s only prom. It is the one time in all your teenage life where the world is telling you to go crazy, crazy, crazy. Stressing about your date, your outfit, and whatever else is the opposite of fun. If you don’t have a date, who cares? Just go stag or bring a friend. No one will think less of you. Clothes too big? Just work it and say it’s the coolest trend from Moscow Fashion Week. True story. Your date hates you? Just… well, maybe that’s something to actually think about. So stop worrying and thinking if you’ll have a fun prom and just have a fun prom. One more thing: do not live-tweet your prom.

DearPromKids

Armi Millare – @armimillare

“It’s just one night and this night will probably forget about you, but you can stay still in that memory, looking rather sharp but operate smooth. For the love of god, cut your fingernails, wear clean shoes, and bring a hankie for unexpected soda-accidents. Wear the most classic-looking suit — one that is simple and fits you well, a dozen clean-cut long-stem white roses for her — and if she gets a bit upset, this gives you pass to get her the most beautiful red ones next day. Don’t come on too strong and just be calm. If it doesn’t work out the way you expect, it’s because you had expectations!”

Tricia Gosingtian – @tgosingtian

“Bring your best girl friend as your date, and make her bring her fabulous gay friend as her date. That’s what I did and I didn’t experience any self-conscious and awkward moments at all!”

Ron Cruz –  @donronX

“Words of wisdom from an uncle talking to his daughter who was going to the prom. He said Remember… holding hands can get you pregnant! I’ll probably say the same thing to my daughter when the time comes.”

CJ Rivera – @cj899

“Always carry breath mints. It’s a plus to have fresh-smelling breath when having those ‘close dancing’ convos!”

Tin Gamboa – @suzy899

“This is a major milestone in your life — take as many pictures as you possibly can! This is one night you’re going to want to remember for the rest of your life!”

Marie Jamora – @mariejamore

“I guess my advice for you would be to learn from Pretty In Pink. You can go stag to the prom and find the boy of your dreams.”

Julia Sniegowski – @Julia_Snieg

“My advice is to really have fun with your prom dress in terms of trends and colors but keep in mind that it’s also a time capsule. So 20 years from now you don’t want to cringe at the outlandish trend, so make sure your dress flatters your shape. Most importantly, wear something that makes you feel like a million bucks!”

An Estrada – @An_Solo

“I think it’s important for guys to bring a ‘surprise baon’ to prom. For instance, every man should learn how to dance the Dougie. It’s an essential skill. And most girls find guys who can Dougie more attractive. Learn it. You’ll thank me later! For girls, use whisper cottony clean for utmost confidence (may chance ka pa to win a date with Daniel Padilla!)”

Erwan Heussaff – @erwanjheussaff

“1) Don’t try to stand out and be unique with your suits. They are called classics for a reason. 2) It’s about the girl, not about you. Learn this now and the next 80 years of your life will be awesome. 3) You probably won’t get laid tonight. So don’t put a box of condoms in your pants. People will see it. 4) You are there with a date. Last I checked, you aren’t dating a group of six guys. Stick with your girl. 5) It’s never okay to wear a hat. 6) You won’t look good in a white tuxedo. Your mom is lying. 7) If you look like you’re floating in your suit, you are probably floating in your suit. 8) Only Channing Tatum is allowed to dance like a black guy.”

Gang Capati – @gangbadoy

“Girls, bring flat shoes for the after-party. Choose a date you can talk to or you actually talk to already on a regular basis — do not, I repeat, do not ask someone you don’t really know, unless you’re okay with 5-7 hours of pregnant silence in a gown. Last: it only happens once; smile for the photo. Boys, act like gentlemen. Open her door. Offer to carry her bag — unless it’s tiny and it matches her gown. If you decide on a corsage/flower — go for a wrist corsage to avoid awkward pinning it on her gown. Choose a white or pale-colored flower, so it will somehow match with her gown. If you meet her folks, be polite, po, opo, good evening po, thank you, the works. Stick to the curfew if there is one. Again — smile for the photos.”

Sean Anthony – @SeanAnthony_10

“Just enjoy the night because you are only young once, and bills, responsibilities, and work are just around the corner. Make memories and have fun!”