The letter heads

Reggie Belmonte

MANILA, Philippines - Q. I am a victim of the Freshmen 15. With the harsh adjustment from high school to college, piles of schoolwork that still needs to be done, I resort to stress eating to calm down. How do you get rid of this habit? —The Froshie

A.There’s no surefire way to break a habit. You have to be really, really determined to wean yourself off it, and you have to invest some effort in creating a healthier new habit. You have to set a definite goal for yourself.

The easiest way to stop snacking is to make snacks inaccessible. Keep a candy stash in your drawer? Toss it out, give it to a younger sibling (if you have one), or put it somewhere that isn’t as easy to get to as the desk where you work. If you can’t go cold turkey, lessen the number of snacks that are immediately available. Cut down bit by bit until you manage to put a complete stop to unnecessary snacking.

You can also opt to switch to healthier snacks. Scour your grocery for low-fat, low-sugar, low calorie goodies that you’ll actually enjoy eating (because eating food you don’t like is a waste of calories, really) and stock up on those.

Eating isn’t the only way to relieve stress. If you’re starting to feel tense or if you feel like taking a break, then take a break. You deserve it. Take five or 10 minutes off to decompress; play a computer game for a while, read through your favorite blog, then get back to work once you’re a little more relaxed. Yes, it’s important to study hard, but you have to look after your sanity, too.

Saab Magalona

Q. My mother is the eternal worrywart. Whenever something good happens to me, she ruins the excitement by being so negative all the time. How do I let her know that it’s not necessary for her to worry all the time without hurting her feelings? — Gina V.

A. Hi, Gina! It’s okay, you’re not alone! My mom used to be overprotective. In grade school, while everyone was going to Robinson’s Galleria (or Galle, as the cool kids called it) I was at home with a one-hour limit on Internet usage. She was a little crazy back then but I understand her now that I’m older. My dad wasn’t a figure of authority at all (he was more like another brother to us) and she was a young mother raising eight children (nine if you count my dad). I never answered back to my mom nor did I question her because I knew her answer would be “because I’m the mom and I say so.” Life is unfair ha-ha-ha. I do remember there was a time when she was feeling very sad and I sat in bed with her and started talking to her like an adult. I told her I understood what she was going through and that she didn’t have to worry all the time. She was a very strict parent but I don’t regret not going to Galle, I liked reading books all day instead. I might have turned out differently if it was the other way around. I told her that if she’s confident in the way she raised us then she wouldn’t have to worry so much. I think she did an excellent job! She’s way more lenient now and there’s no more secrets between us. When I go out I let her know who I’m with, if I’m drinking, who the designated driver is and when I’m home I let her know! It’s all about communication and compromise. I even talk to her about my relationships! As long as there is trust then she will be able to let you do what you want. Unless you’re 12 or something, then you’ll just have to wait. Because she’s mom and she says so.

Ramon Bautista

Q. I’d like to have a social life! What do I do?  — Blyanboy

A. The first step to having a social life is blending in. Observe the people you want to socialize with and find out what they like and what they don’t like. Evaluate yourself and which of your attributes will be accepted or rejected. Adjust your personality to match theirs. It doesn’t sound as romantic as “just be yourself,” but that’s just how society works. Not that I’m telling you not to be yourself but I’m suggesting you put your best foot forward - and that means whichever foot is best to your potential peers. When they start liking you, you can start revealing your true colors as you have gained their adulation and undying friendship. Good luck!