'Mga pagmumuni-muni lamang'

Kung ang pagbabasehan ng pagiging mabuting Pilipino ay ang mastery of national language, then, suffice it to say, wala akong kwentang Pilipino.

I speak in English, write in English, think in English. I even dream in English. Wansapanataym, siguro ipagyayabang ko ‘tong over-proficiency in the global language. After all, the ability to speak in English spells GOLD: Great Opportunities Lie Der. Plus, English speakers are usually associated with money, more money, and a classiness acquired through years of practice. Well, at least sa konteksto ng ‘Pinas.

However, I’ve reached a point in my life where my ineptitude in the vernacular has become more embarrassing than “cute.” In fact, kung ‘di lang ako naniniwala kay Sartre tungkol sa responsibilidad natin sa sariling gawa, I’d blame my mother. Hinubog niya ako sa pamamagitan ng Disney movies at patakaran ng English lang sa bahay. But I digress.

Sa ngayon, gusto ko lang talaga matutong magsalita sa Wikang Filipino. At pagkatapos nun, Ilonggo, Bisaya, at Cuyunin naman. Pero isa-isa muna. I can’t even think in straight Filipino yet.

Bilang isang manunulat, nakakahinayang ang pagkukulang ko sa paggamit ng sariling wika. Indeed, for all my facility in English, wala naman ‘tong kwenta kung higit sa kalahati ng populasyon ng Pilipinas ay hindi naman nakakasalita o nakakaintindi ng Ingles. And while I’m not assuming anything about the number of people I actually reach with my writing, gusto kong isipin na ang pagsusulat sa bernakular ay nakakatulong, kahit papano, sa pagbubuo ng pambansang kamalayan at identitad.

But let’s face it, in this country — a third-world neo-colony of the US — English sells. Sabihin man natin na second language parin ang Ingles dito at ginagamit lang naman ng kakaunting bahagi ng populasyon (i.e. the wealthy and educated), the fact remains that English is the language for those who want to get ahead. Here, it’s no secret that affairs of business, government, education, medicine, science, etc. are all conducted in English. Small wonder, then, that our citizens are extremely marketable abroad. Because truly, ano naman ang laban ng isang sobrang techie na Koreyano na hindi marunong mag-Ingles kompara sa Pinoy na nakakaunting Ingles kahit walang alam sa kompyuter science? Kahit anong sabihin ng mga tao, the language barrier is still the first hurdle that has to be overcome sans everything else — at least in terms of selling oneself internationally.

Kaya nga ang galing ng Pinoy kung sa abroad eh. I’m saying this in general, because to a certain extent, our adaptive capability cannot be denied. That said, however, our inclination and familiarity with the English language should always be taken with a grain of salt and viewed as a double-edged sword. Pwede naman tayo maging ‘internasyonal’ na hindi kinukompromiso ang pagbibigay halaga sa sariling wika. Wala naman kasing masama sa pagpapakitang-gilas sa Ingles, at sabi nga nila, if you’ve got it, flaunt it. Subalit, nagiging problema lang ito kapag ang wikang Filipino ay namamaliit kumpara sa Ingles, at kapag ang nagiging mentalidad ng mga tao (lalo’t na sa mga upper class) ay na mas mainam mag-Ingles kaysa Filipino. Nakakatawa na nakakalungkot, kasi kung tutuusin, ang Ingles ay isang exogenous at imported na lengguwahe lamang. ‘Di naman talaga atin ‘to, pero mas nabibigyan natin ito ng prayoridad because it sells and because of the influx of cultural products abroad.

That’s the sad reality of our language here. I should know, having come from a school where Filipino class was one of the banes of high school existence and where one could be penalized for reciting in Filipino instead of English. Even the most nationalistic and well-intentioned of educators generally use English as their default language in teaching, (at least here in Manila) usually only switching to straight Filipino in those classes that actually call for it. And given everything I’ve said above, this is normal in our society. Pati sa iba’t ibang klase ng midya, print, radio, TV, at kung ano pa man, ang paggamit ng Filipino ay nalilimitado sa gags, tsismis, sensasyonal na drama, at yellow journalism in general (not including GMA and ABS-CBN’s primetime news, but still), habang ang Ingles ay nakareserba para sa mas pormal at masmataas na lebel ng diskurso (o para rin sa mga poseur na DJ nagkukunwaring Amerikano).

Sayang lang talaga.

Kung naging kasanayan natin na makipag-talastasan sa Filipino at kung na-socialize lang tayo ng ating mga lider sa ibang pamamaraan (in terms of developing a solid Filipino language base), lumabas na sana ang potensyal ng ating wika sa pagpapataas ng panlipunang diskurso.

In an ideal, parallel universe, I wouldn’t be writing in Taglish and we wouldn’t ever have to celebrate Buwan ng Wika. The former is pretty self-explanatory, and the latter should be too. The fact that we actually have to designate a month as a reminder for us to celebrate our national language says a lot about how we actually view Filipino as a mode of communication. Ano ngayon, gagamitin lang ang wikang Filipino dahil Agosto ang itinakdang buwan para dito? Think about it.

And now that August is over and done with, I’ve made it a resolution on my part to relearn the Filipino language, get rid of my conyo verbal crutches once and for all, and patronize authors who actually write mellifluously in the vernacular.

Namamatay lang ang isang sibilasyon sa pagkamatay ng kanyang wika. The onslaught of globalization and so-called “development” aside, huwag natin pabayaan na mamatay ang wikang Filipino.

Isa itong hamon sa ating lahat.