Quarterlife realizations
July 8, 2005 | 12:00am
It happened suddenly. I don’t think I was even aware it was happening until one day – BOOM – like the dust that collects under your bed, the years have added up and suddenly you’re an adult… at least, when it comes to age (maturity, on the other hand, is something else altogether). In either case, this sudden entrance into the grownup world is a realization I’ve been grappling with since the year began. After all, I could no longer ignore that I’ve finally hit quarterlife this year after my 25th birthday. Heck, I practically had to hold back tears as I moved from the 20-24 tick box to the one right beside it. I think it may be because I’ve always told myself that so long as I was below the 25-year age group I still had the license to act like a kid – and by that I mean recognize no immediate responsibilities, spend my paycheck the moment I get it, and still be undecided about the future. This year all that has started to change and to be quite frank, it’s both scaring and exciting me.
The biggest sign happened way back in January on my 25th birthday. I partied hard with good friends and forgot about all the cares in the world, but the next day when that one final year of irresponsible childhood was gone for good, I started getting anxious about what was to come next. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t totally unprepared for this inevitability. I did put some thought into how I planned on jumpstarting my life this year. Before 2004 ended, I had already begun planning on starting a business with some good friends, I had made up my mind to further my education, and I had thought about how I was planning on working on my savings. So, in a way, I was already slowly making the transition before it actually happened. But still, planning remains worlds away from doing and now that I’m in the "doing" stage, I’m really starting to feel the changes in my life.
First of all (and this is the most shallow of all the changes), I’m actually awake during the day. Shedding my well-known vampire persona of years past I’m up and about during the day doing whatever I need to get done. Either I’m working on an article, meeting with suppliers, interviewing, shooting, or designing I’m finally finding ways to properly allocate my time and resources. I’ve made major steps in building the foundation for the business my friends and I began last year. And I’ve gone back to school. So the next step? Finally saving and beginning my long journey to financial stability.
So how different does the world look now without the rose-tinted glasses of my very prolonged youth? Different but not necessarily bad. As cliché as it sounds, I’ve begun to realize things I would have normally laughed off otherwise. Like, despite the passing years and heavy feelings of responsibilities and of needing to make money and boost my career, getting old doesn’t have to mean letting go of all the dreams of childhood. Even as the clock keeps ticking, it’s never too late to follow your dreams. Recently I was asked what my motto was and I realized that over the years it’s never really changed. In my grade school yearbook it was "persistence spells success," in high school it was "give me one firm point on which to stand and I will move the Earth" and to this day it’s "follow your dreams. When you want something badly enough, the entire universe conspires to help you get it"… in the end, the message they all portray is the same – go forth and conquer, seize your dreams and make them a reality. I believe this. These days, even as I fix my log books, or catalog my inventory, or try to balance accounts at the back of my head I have many more dreams I’m looking forward to making real. Quite frankly, I’ve had several come true already and the realization that I have the power to fulfill more is really becoming the (forgive the corniness) icing on my cake of life.
In a way, it’s both ironic and appropriate that I figure this out while dealing with the responsibility of hitting quarterlife. But whatever the case may be, I’m grateful that I still believe in Neverland. And do you know what one of the biggest things was that pushed me to this grownup realization? It was going back to high school. Yup, this year I was pleasantly surprised to receive a call from my high school alma mater, Assumption in San Lorenzo, to ask me if I would be interested in moderating their drama club, Assumpta Theatrica. Last year’s moderator and my good friend, Lesley, had recommended me and they gave me a ring.
Their offer was really a no-brainer for me. Back when I was in high school in Assumption, I was the president of Theatrica, so to be given the opportunity to come full circle was a welcome challenge and opportunity, and one that I happily accepted. When I finally met with the incumbent president and saw the members of the club it was really a moment of epiphany. The tables had truly turned. They were looking to me for guidance and asking me what I thought of their plans. For a while, whenever they asked a question I kept thinking of glancing behind me to see which grownup they were talking to before quietly realizing that they were talking to me. And even better, I realized that I actually knew what to answer them. It was indeed quite a full circle.
And yet, despite the fact that I’d taken on the role of the "adult" in the organization, it was nice to see that the girls could still relate to me and even feel free to express their real opinions to me. I was pleasantly surprised to be immediately taken in as "one of them" and it was this coupled with full circle transition and the realizations I’ve had this year that made me conclude that the best is yet to come. Quarterlife or not, I’ve still got a lot of things that I have to do and a lot of things that I have to accomplish that age will not put a stop to. After all, when I was younger I dreamt big and now I actually have the ability to make those dreams come true.
To make a long, and looking back at it, confusing story short, I just realized that it is possible to be both young carefree spirit and responsible adult – in equal doses. Don’t get lost in the business of being a mature and money-making grownup that you forget how wonderful and liberating it is to be a child. Growing up doesn’t mean letting go of that Peter Pan spirit that believes that with a happy thought you can fly. It simply means moderation, basically a time and a place for everything. Write down your crazy and exciting goals so that you never lose sight of them and in between establishing your career and making your fortune, get that tattoo you’ve always wanted (I certainly got mine) or go on that crazy African safari you’ve always dreamed of. It’s never ever too late to do anything. After all, regardless of how young or old we are, life constantly presents us with thousands of opportunities. All we have to do is simply take one.
The biggest sign happened way back in January on my 25th birthday. I partied hard with good friends and forgot about all the cares in the world, but the next day when that one final year of irresponsible childhood was gone for good, I started getting anxious about what was to come next. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t totally unprepared for this inevitability. I did put some thought into how I planned on jumpstarting my life this year. Before 2004 ended, I had already begun planning on starting a business with some good friends, I had made up my mind to further my education, and I had thought about how I was planning on working on my savings. So, in a way, I was already slowly making the transition before it actually happened. But still, planning remains worlds away from doing and now that I’m in the "doing" stage, I’m really starting to feel the changes in my life.
First of all (and this is the most shallow of all the changes), I’m actually awake during the day. Shedding my well-known vampire persona of years past I’m up and about during the day doing whatever I need to get done. Either I’m working on an article, meeting with suppliers, interviewing, shooting, or designing I’m finally finding ways to properly allocate my time and resources. I’ve made major steps in building the foundation for the business my friends and I began last year. And I’ve gone back to school. So the next step? Finally saving and beginning my long journey to financial stability.
So how different does the world look now without the rose-tinted glasses of my very prolonged youth? Different but not necessarily bad. As cliché as it sounds, I’ve begun to realize things I would have normally laughed off otherwise. Like, despite the passing years and heavy feelings of responsibilities and of needing to make money and boost my career, getting old doesn’t have to mean letting go of all the dreams of childhood. Even as the clock keeps ticking, it’s never too late to follow your dreams. Recently I was asked what my motto was and I realized that over the years it’s never really changed. In my grade school yearbook it was "persistence spells success," in high school it was "give me one firm point on which to stand and I will move the Earth" and to this day it’s "follow your dreams. When you want something badly enough, the entire universe conspires to help you get it"… in the end, the message they all portray is the same – go forth and conquer, seize your dreams and make them a reality. I believe this. These days, even as I fix my log books, or catalog my inventory, or try to balance accounts at the back of my head I have many more dreams I’m looking forward to making real. Quite frankly, I’ve had several come true already and the realization that I have the power to fulfill more is really becoming the (forgive the corniness) icing on my cake of life.
In a way, it’s both ironic and appropriate that I figure this out while dealing with the responsibility of hitting quarterlife. But whatever the case may be, I’m grateful that I still believe in Neverland. And do you know what one of the biggest things was that pushed me to this grownup realization? It was going back to high school. Yup, this year I was pleasantly surprised to receive a call from my high school alma mater, Assumption in San Lorenzo, to ask me if I would be interested in moderating their drama club, Assumpta Theatrica. Last year’s moderator and my good friend, Lesley, had recommended me and they gave me a ring.
Their offer was really a no-brainer for me. Back when I was in high school in Assumption, I was the president of Theatrica, so to be given the opportunity to come full circle was a welcome challenge and opportunity, and one that I happily accepted. When I finally met with the incumbent president and saw the members of the club it was really a moment of epiphany. The tables had truly turned. They were looking to me for guidance and asking me what I thought of their plans. For a while, whenever they asked a question I kept thinking of glancing behind me to see which grownup they were talking to before quietly realizing that they were talking to me. And even better, I realized that I actually knew what to answer them. It was indeed quite a full circle.
And yet, despite the fact that I’d taken on the role of the "adult" in the organization, it was nice to see that the girls could still relate to me and even feel free to express their real opinions to me. I was pleasantly surprised to be immediately taken in as "one of them" and it was this coupled with full circle transition and the realizations I’ve had this year that made me conclude that the best is yet to come. Quarterlife or not, I’ve still got a lot of things that I have to do and a lot of things that I have to accomplish that age will not put a stop to. After all, when I was younger I dreamt big and now I actually have the ability to make those dreams come true.
To make a long, and looking back at it, confusing story short, I just realized that it is possible to be both young carefree spirit and responsible adult – in equal doses. Don’t get lost in the business of being a mature and money-making grownup that you forget how wonderful and liberating it is to be a child. Growing up doesn’t mean letting go of that Peter Pan spirit that believes that with a happy thought you can fly. It simply means moderation, basically a time and a place for everything. Write down your crazy and exciting goals so that you never lose sight of them and in between establishing your career and making your fortune, get that tattoo you’ve always wanted (I certainly got mine) or go on that crazy African safari you’ve always dreamed of. It’s never ever too late to do anything. After all, regardless of how young or old we are, life constantly presents us with thousands of opportunities. All we have to do is simply take one.
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