Friendship or career?
August 15, 2003 | 12:00am
SISTERS ACT By Mai Mai & China Cojuangco…AND MOM REACTS By Tingting Cojuangco
Dear China, Maimai And Tingting,
I have this problem with my officemate who is also my friend and kumare. Both of us hold good positions in the office but she, being the administration officer, handles and monitors the time of all the staff. Last year, she got the award but I know that in my officemates’ mind they wonder: "Does she deserve it?" She always has excuses not to attend meetings and I was able to prove twice that she was telling a lie. My boss doesn’t know this is one of the reasons why I’m leaving the company. I am concerned that my replacement might feel the same way and resign as well. How do I tell my boss without ruining our friendship?
Concerned Employee
You have to make a decision based on the greater good. If you think the greater good is for you to keep the friendship, then just keep quiet and let things be revealed naturally – and you know this will be revealed. However, if you think the greater good is for you to tell your boss now, then by all means, do so. You can tell your boss that you are raising the concern in confidence so it doesn’t leak out that you exposed your friend. The bottom line is you should be comfortable with your decision and you should be able to sleep at night.
China
I’m sure you have a better reason for leaving your office than the bad work ethics of your kumare. In the first place, you should have told your friend about the office talk as soon as it started. It would have alerted her and who knows, she would have curved this bad habit now. But since you kept quiet, yes, I think you should tell your boss. You have an obligation as an employee in a position of trust. Still, as a friend, I think you should tell her about your misgivings.
Maimai
The nasty talk about your friend should have been nipped in the bud. You should have confronted her and informed her about it up front. Still, it isn’t too late. I think you should have the courage to speak out especially because you are her kumare. She probably would be more hurt if she learned about this from another person. After you’ve talked to her, I think you should warn the boss about her ways. Since you’ve opened your friend’s eyes, you should also keep your boss alert.
Tingting
Dear China, Maimai And Tingting,
It sucks! I really want to pursue a career in the call center industry but my parents are stopping me. It pays really well but one of their concerns is me getting sick doing the graveyard shift. Another is travelling at weird hours of the night. I know I’m ready for it but my parents don’t seem to trust my capabilities. I finished college and although I have jumped from one job to another, I’d like to pursue this one this time. What should I do? I’m so disappointed and confused.
Little Distressed Girl
It’s understandable for you to feel disappointed. You can remedy this by pursuing the career you want. Of course, your parents have a right to their opinion and their advice should be studied carefully. Going on the graveyard shift could be really taxing and your parents probably just don’t want you to discover this once you’re committed to the job already. Still, since you’re of age, you are entitled to your own choices. Just be sure of your decision so that you won’t hear any "I told you so’s."
China
Your parents’ concerns are very legitimate. Of course, being a girl and going home at odd hours of the night would keep them awake. Your parents probably think that because you’ve been jumping from one job to another, you’re not yet ready to take on another one. Worse, it may have reflected instability and your inability to make crucial decisions. Tell them why you like the job so much. Convince them that this is really what you’d like to do now. When you’ve done that, be more commited and stick to your chosen work.
Maimai
I am sure your parents have your best interests in mind when since they don’t want you to get into the call center industry. Money is not always the deciding factor. Even if it earns much, when your health and safety are compromised, you should take a second look at your options. Of course, the decision should really be yours especially as you’ve already graduated from college. Still, I think you should give some weight to your parents’.
Tingting
Dear China, Maimai And Tingting,
I hope you can help me with my eyebag problem. I am reluctant to face people because of the dark linings under my eyes. People say I’m too young to have eyebags. I’m not even an insomniac. Do you know of any medication or can you give me some beauty tips to remedy this? I hope you can help me get a not-so-expensive solution. Thank you and God bless.
Dark Eyes
The cheapest way is for you to use the right concealer. If you go around the malls, there are plenty of sales ladies in the cosmetic department who offer trial treatments. Try their products and find the one that best suits you. Of course, the usual eight-hour sleep is a must. Avoid eye drops and be careful in choosing your makeup. Your eyes might be allergic to these and might irritate it more.
China
Eyebags are puffiness under the eyes. Eye fluids that accumulate in the folds under the eyes usually cause this. I suggest you put an extra pillow when you sleep to avoid the puffiness. Exercise and a cut-down on salt can also help. But you were also talking of dark circles under your eyes. I know that this is caused by high skin pigmentation under the eye and is usually hereditary. For this, I think you should go to a doctor and find a more permanent cure. However, makeup is always an option.
Maimai
Some women’s dark circles are a result of high amount of pigment under their eyes. It is said that irritants like dust and cigarette smoke may cause it to be more stressed. I really suggest you go to an ophthalmologist so he can determine if the problem is eye-related or not. I don’t think it is, but better to be safe than sorry. Then, you must go to a dermatologist to get expert opinion. I don’t think this is going to be expensive. In the meantime, the easiest remedy is camouflage. Use a light concealer.
Tingting
Send questions to sistersact_ys@yahoo.com
Dear China, Maimai And Tingting,
I have this problem with my officemate who is also my friend and kumare. Both of us hold good positions in the office but she, being the administration officer, handles and monitors the time of all the staff. Last year, she got the award but I know that in my officemates’ mind they wonder: "Does she deserve it?" She always has excuses not to attend meetings and I was able to prove twice that she was telling a lie. My boss doesn’t know this is one of the reasons why I’m leaving the company. I am concerned that my replacement might feel the same way and resign as well. How do I tell my boss without ruining our friendship?
Concerned Employee
You have to make a decision based on the greater good. If you think the greater good is for you to keep the friendship, then just keep quiet and let things be revealed naturally – and you know this will be revealed. However, if you think the greater good is for you to tell your boss now, then by all means, do so. You can tell your boss that you are raising the concern in confidence so it doesn’t leak out that you exposed your friend. The bottom line is you should be comfortable with your decision and you should be able to sleep at night.
China
I’m sure you have a better reason for leaving your office than the bad work ethics of your kumare. In the first place, you should have told your friend about the office talk as soon as it started. It would have alerted her and who knows, she would have curved this bad habit now. But since you kept quiet, yes, I think you should tell your boss. You have an obligation as an employee in a position of trust. Still, as a friend, I think you should tell her about your misgivings.
Maimai
The nasty talk about your friend should have been nipped in the bud. You should have confronted her and informed her about it up front. Still, it isn’t too late. I think you should have the courage to speak out especially because you are her kumare. She probably would be more hurt if she learned about this from another person. After you’ve talked to her, I think you should warn the boss about her ways. Since you’ve opened your friend’s eyes, you should also keep your boss alert.
Tingting
It sucks! I really want to pursue a career in the call center industry but my parents are stopping me. It pays really well but one of their concerns is me getting sick doing the graveyard shift. Another is travelling at weird hours of the night. I know I’m ready for it but my parents don’t seem to trust my capabilities. I finished college and although I have jumped from one job to another, I’d like to pursue this one this time. What should I do? I’m so disappointed and confused.
Little Distressed Girl
It’s understandable for you to feel disappointed. You can remedy this by pursuing the career you want. Of course, your parents have a right to their opinion and their advice should be studied carefully. Going on the graveyard shift could be really taxing and your parents probably just don’t want you to discover this once you’re committed to the job already. Still, since you’re of age, you are entitled to your own choices. Just be sure of your decision so that you won’t hear any "I told you so’s."
China
Your parents’ concerns are very legitimate. Of course, being a girl and going home at odd hours of the night would keep them awake. Your parents probably think that because you’ve been jumping from one job to another, you’re not yet ready to take on another one. Worse, it may have reflected instability and your inability to make crucial decisions. Tell them why you like the job so much. Convince them that this is really what you’d like to do now. When you’ve done that, be more commited and stick to your chosen work.
Maimai
I am sure your parents have your best interests in mind when since they don’t want you to get into the call center industry. Money is not always the deciding factor. Even if it earns much, when your health and safety are compromised, you should take a second look at your options. Of course, the decision should really be yours especially as you’ve already graduated from college. Still, I think you should give some weight to your parents’.
Tingting
I hope you can help me with my eyebag problem. I am reluctant to face people because of the dark linings under my eyes. People say I’m too young to have eyebags. I’m not even an insomniac. Do you know of any medication or can you give me some beauty tips to remedy this? I hope you can help me get a not-so-expensive solution. Thank you and God bless.
Dark Eyes
The cheapest way is for you to use the right concealer. If you go around the malls, there are plenty of sales ladies in the cosmetic department who offer trial treatments. Try their products and find the one that best suits you. Of course, the usual eight-hour sleep is a must. Avoid eye drops and be careful in choosing your makeup. Your eyes might be allergic to these and might irritate it more.
China
Eyebags are puffiness under the eyes. Eye fluids that accumulate in the folds under the eyes usually cause this. I suggest you put an extra pillow when you sleep to avoid the puffiness. Exercise and a cut-down on salt can also help. But you were also talking of dark circles under your eyes. I know that this is caused by high skin pigmentation under the eye and is usually hereditary. For this, I think you should go to a doctor and find a more permanent cure. However, makeup is always an option.
Maimai
Some women’s dark circles are a result of high amount of pigment under their eyes. It is said that irritants like dust and cigarette smoke may cause it to be more stressed. I really suggest you go to an ophthalmologist so he can determine if the problem is eye-related or not. I don’t think it is, but better to be safe than sorry. Then, you must go to a dermatologist to get expert opinion. I don’t think this is going to be expensive. In the meantime, the easiest remedy is camouflage. Use a light concealer.
Tingting
BrandSpace Articles
<
>