The 12-round snoozefest
Howdy!
As the 26th Southeast Asian Games draws near and the PBA Philippine Cup heats up, a score of sports personalities dropped their letters on my mailbox, hoping to squeeze out the juiciest answers to their most outrageous questions.
In this edition, a promising coach and a prized fighter wonder what looms ahead while an official from the Philippine Olympic Committee questions the wisdom behind the bloated SEA Games contingent.
Also, I'll try to answer the query of a well-respected mentor who have already won titles in various leagues but couldn't find his groove in the ongoing PBA Philippine Cup. Is he being jinxed or are his players do not find him commanding at all?
All that and more only here in this week's edition of Dear Brutus.
(And as always; the answers are real, the questions were fabricated)
***
Dear Brutus,
Have you already seen our SEA Games lineup?
Holy. Crap!
What do you think went wrong? Yes, we have a criteria to make sure that only the best and the brightest will go, but why were there some disqualified athletes who were smiling their way to Indonesia, gloating that they have a wealthy godfather who will finance their participation.
Is it fair?
Confused,
J.R. of Makati
Dear J.R. of Makati
Hey, Joey Romasanta, I don't want to sound like a villain, but I know that you are a seasoned sport official who knows that the SEA Games is in the bottom of the totem pole when you're talking about the quality of the games. It is nothing but a mere sportsfest aimed at fostering camaraderie and promoting goodwill among Southeast Asian nations.
But to bloat the delegation is quite unfair, especially for a third-world country such as the Philippines.
Okay, let's pretend that the PSC is your dad and it has only P30 million on its wallet. However, it has to spend P80,000 each for its 500 children – otherwise, it will look like an evil father in the eyes of its relatives, nosy neighbors and other critics.
What do you think the PSC should do? The answer: Send some of its children to their wealthy godparents for financial support. Yes, it's embarrassing, but that's the quickest fix, the band-aid solution.
The most logical answer, however, is to manage the number of children early on. That's why condoms were invented. But we're not talking about babies here. We're talking about athletes who will represent the country. Remember: sending 10 athletes who won 10 gold medals is way better – and cheaper – than sending 100 athletes.
Assembling a SEA Games delegation is not rocket science. Instead of sending 500 athletes, you should have sent 200 of our brightest athletes and invested the entire P30 million for their equipment, food and nutrition, coaches and foreign exposure.
Do the PSC and the POC erred on this one?
Yes – as they always do.
Cheers,
Brutus
***
Dear Brutus,
Despite Tim Cone's departure, Alaska fans were still confident, knowing that his successor would be equally capable of giving them the crown. After all, that person has been with the organization for quite some time and had patiently repaired the loopholes in Alaska's zone defense to perfectly compliment Tim's triangle offense.
Okay, to cut the suspense, that person was me.
Brutus, I honestly feel that I am a good coach. Look at my resume: 2002 UAAP champion with Ateneo and 2003 PBA champion with Talk 'N Text. Is that a bad record? I don't think so.
But after four games since assuming the head coaching chore, why am I still winless? Are my players still playing under Tim's shadows? Or do I have to call a voodoo doctor to cast away the evil spell? What the hell is going on?
Please help.
Still having sleepless nights,
J.B. of Quezon City
Dear J.B. of Quezon City,
Joel Banal, I know you as the great enforcer for Great Taste so shed your tears and quit acting like a brat.
You know what, Tim's resignation came as a surprise, and nobody – not even Fred Uytengsu or Joaqui Trillo – was prepared to kiss him goodbye after two decades of partnership.
Then, the following morning, you woke up as the team's new head coach. You went into practice acting as if you're Tim Cone and the players believing that, indeed, you are Tim Cone – the blue-eyed grand slam-winning, former RP Centennial Team mentor who preaches the gospel of discipline and unselfish basketball.
The following day, you realized that you are not Tim Cone.
You are Joel Banal – and there's a lot of work to be done.
Joel, everybody goes through a period of transition. The four consecutive losses you had were not brought by jinx or by your players' unwillingness to cooperate. Rather, it is brought by the entire organization's unfamiliarity with the situation.
Everybody is still adjusting. Please be patient. W's will come soon.
Always in full support,
Brutus
***
Dear Brutus,
What's in store for me in Taft?
G.A. of Taft Avenue, Manila
Dear G.A. of Taft Avenue, Manila
I hate to say this but controversies – a lot of it – await you in your new role as head coach of the De La Salle Green Archers.
The eligibility scandal that rocked the UAAP to its foundation in 2005 can attest to the fact that the members of the De La Salle community are highly obsessive in winning.
They will not do everything to win. They will do anything to win.
They will move heaven and earth, come what may, till kingdom come, just to relieve their glorious past. So you have to win big – it's now or never.
And to make sure that you will work your ass off, they hired prized mentor Jong Uichico as consultant. Remember how Ateneo pressured Sandy Arespacochaga to deliver by bringing in Norman Black as consultant, or how NU gave the unknown Eric Gonzales the coaching chore for one season before the real Eric – Eric Altamirano – finally took over?
Gee, I'm not saying that your two week-old job is already in jeopardy with Jong on board. I'm just saying that you gotta be careful because Jong is breathing down your neck, ready to take over should you fail on your promise of awarding La Salle another men's basketball title.
The clock is ticking, Gee. Start working as soon as possible.
Regards,
Brutus
***
Dear Brutus,
If you have seen my fight against Omar Narvaez, I know you're very, very disappointed. It was a 12-round snoozefest. He climbed the ring with all the safety precautions. I gave him the chance to hit me, but he was not in the mood to box. All he did was run, run and run.
Do you think I made the right decision to sign up for a snoozefest with this erstwhile unbeaten boxer from Argentina? How do you will it affect my career?
Still fresh,
N.D. of San Leandro, California (via SMS from Manhattan, New York)
Dear N.D. of San Leandro, California
I'm sorry to say this, but your victory over Narvaez did nothing good on your blossoming career.
Look, Manny Pacquiao the stowaway kid became Manny Pacquiao the boxing champion and pay-per-view sensation because he survived all those bloody battles. He finished the respective careers of Marco Antonio Barrera, Erik Morales, Ricky Hatton and Oscar De La Hoya in a nail-biting fashion while serving as the Filipinos' ambassador of goodwill in the West.
Sure, he also met some phony fighters like Joshua Clottey, Antonio Margarito and Shane Mosley along the way, but he still gave the fans a spectacular display of speed and firepower to make sure that they were getting their money worth. That's what fans love about Pacquiao. He knows that boxing is entertainment and turning these douchebags into punching bags will earn him legions of fans, thus, increasing his marketability and pay-per-view value.
In your case, you are not as charismatic as Manny. Yes, you are a matador on the ring, but Filipinos are more concerned on what you do outside the ring rather than on top of it. And while Manny is perceived as the hero of the masses for helping the needy, you are seen as a black sheep who is engaged in a messy financial squabble with your own father.
A big fight in New York could have easily skyrocketed your appeal. Unfortunately, your foe, Narvaez, was such a jerk and instead of agreeing to become your moving target for the sake of the people who paid a handsome amount for this title fight, he ran and ran to his heart's delight. You should have crushed him. You should have turned this coward into a bloody mess. You should have ended his career with a resounding victory.
But what did you do?
Now, do you think people will pay a fortune just to see both of you fight the next time you climb the ring?
I don't think so.
Keep on punching,
Brutus
