7 random things I learned from planning a wedding

Though some may consider me a “wedding expert,” I don’t have any hardcore advise or lecture here, especially on marriage. Instead, I thought I'd share some random things I've learned after a decade of planning weddings.

You see, I planned and orchestrated my own wedding more than eight years ago. While planning the wedding, I came across this line:

A Wedding is One day; A Marriage is a Lifetime.

It is so true in every sense. For most soon-to-wed couples, especially future brides, they get lost in the madness that goes with planning that “perfect” day. And through all the flurry of things, they tend to forget what really matters the most, and why they are having a wedding in the first place. So here’s my two cents for the future bride and groom, or if you know of engaged couples, do share these planning and preparation tips:

1. Set a budget and work with it

Unless money grows in your backyard, try to work within your means. Be creative, practical and realistic. It's bad enough that you go way over budget, but starting off your marriage deep in debt is far worse. I was a little under budget and it went a long way as pocket money for our honeymoon!

2. Communicate, compromise and commit

Say what you want and “say it now or forever hold your piece” -- from money matters to the confetti. Be honest and open. Talk things out and argue, it's natural -- that is a preview into your marriage you know. Resolve the conflicts as they come. And no finger-pointing!

3. Mind your details

It's really all in the details. From your monogrammed invites, poignant speeches, hand-written “Thank You” notes, a bespoke bridal shoes, or heirloom jewelry, these are what will make your day memorable, unique and more personal no matter how simple the event. So put some thought even in the tiniest of elements.

4. There's no such thing as a "flawless" day, so learn to live with it

Murphy's Law: Expect that there will always be something that will not go as planned, even from the most organized. Having professionals on hand will help make your day go smoothly and hopefully you won't even notice those strays along the way. Unfortunately for me, as the planner and director of my big day, I did notice! But we're happy, and the guests had a wonderful time, that's all that matters.

5. The rings and photos are what's left

After everything, the wedding rings are the only lasting items left, as with the photos that hold the precious memories. These are my top two priority items. Same goes for the food, which the guests will remember.

6. Be emotionally, financially, spiritually, psychologically and physically prepared

Check on all five and you're good to go. For me, aside from your devotion for each other, these should be an all-or-nothing condition.

7. Plan a wedding that you want, not what you see from others or what others want for you

It's your wedding, it's your marriage, it's your choice. Plan on what will make you happy for your special day. I've seen weddings that does not represent the couple -- it becomes their parents' or in-laws' event, not theirs. Go back to Nos. 2 and 3 and own your day. I am just blessed that I did get the wedding I wanted.

Reality check: Entering marital bliss requires more than just a perfect wedding plan, and this is only the beginning of your journey. This serves as a shout-out for soon-to-wed couples and the rest of you singles out there who still believe in marriage, bad days included. Love, patience, respect, compromise -- you need these while planning, and you definitely need lots of these in your marriage.