No boyfriend since birth

Dear Tita Witty,

I’m 22 and I’ve never had a boyfriend. I’m a fresh grad and have been working at my first job for three months now. Syempre pag bago ka sa office, people would ask me if I was in a relationship. I would say no at NBSB ako, and they’d ask why. How do I answer them when I myself don’t know the answer?

I went to an all-girls school in grade school and high school. I don’t have a brother and almost all my cousins are girls so I was only exposed to boys when I was in college. I know it’s not an excuse, but when I was still in school, I prioritized my studies. But people don’t believe me when I tell them that.

Ngayon, halos lahat ng friends ko may love life na. Tita Witty anyare dun sa sa’kin? Ganun ba ka-traffic sa EDSA? I know I should wait because people tell me it comes unexpectedly. Pero Tita, napapaisip kasi ako — may problema ba sa’kin? Boys always seem to like my friends, especially my best friends. Ang hirap kaya. Feeling mo ang panget mo. Hihi.

I’m not bitter and I’m totally enjoying my single life. I just want to feel how others feel. ‘Yung may makakausap kang isang tao na alam mong hindi ka huhusgahan. How do you boost the confidence of an NBSB girl?

Thanks, Tita!

Love,

NBSB girl

Dear NBSB girl,

Pansin kong ilang beses mong sinabi ang “other people.” ‘Teh, wapakels tayo sa kanila! Bakit, sila bang nagbayad ng tuition mo? Humihingi ka ba ng pang-lunch at shopping sa kanila? And most importantly, si Adam Levine ba sila? What other people think and say about what you do with your life may seem so important now that you’re young, but as you grow older, you’ll see that it really is. Cheka.

I think it’s very admirable that you chose to prioritize your studies; a lot of young people choose not to do that. Do not be ashamed that you made that choice and it’s not an excuse for anything.

To answer your question, yes, ‘teh, ganun kalala ang traffic sa EDSA. From QC to Pasig matatapos mong basahin ang Lord of the Rings pati The Hobbit and you would actually enjoy it. Hindi ko masasagot kung may problema sa’yo. Baka naman kasi um-order ka ng extra rice sa first date at no-no ‘yun sabi ni Ramon Bautista.

But seriously, ‘wag kang mainip dahil bata ka pa! You’re only three months into your first job! Ang dami mo pang makikilala. ‘Yung mabango, ‘yung parang ang tali-talino niya pag nagpe-present siya sa meeting, ‘yung okay lang na um-order ka ng extra rice and he won’t judge you. You have a whole career waiting to be built and it is while you are building it that you will gain confidence.

I understand na medyo nakakababa ng self-esteem kapag friends mo lagi ang nagugustuhan and I don’t think there’s anything I can say that can actually boost your confidence. But I do know that being romantically involved with someone will not do the job. It will just have to come from within yourself; nobody else can give you the validation that you need. Isipin mo na lang, candidates and friends mo na ma-heartbroken. Bwahahaha.

XOXO,

Tita Witty

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