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Supreme's guide to New Year's resolutions | Philstar.com
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Supreme

Supreme's guide to New Year's resolutions

Cate de Leon - The Philippine Star

MANILA, Philippines - We celebrate each new year with a tinge of doubt. We push it to the farthest recesses of our minds as we ecstatically drink to fresh beginnings and a chance to do things over. But we know that the novelty and good vibes will soon wear off. Resolutions are usually doomed to a short run because pretty soon they bump up against our old habits, our old fears, our old conditions and, well, life going back to being life.

Here at Supreme we don’t believe in distracting our readers with pom-poms, but we can give you our two cents’ worth on how to deal and have a good life while at it. So if you feel your feet settling back down to the ground, don’t worry. You don’t need to deny reality to keep your dreams. After all, heaven on earth wouldn’t be possible without the dirt.

Be choosy

It’s fun to throw around the phrase “Wag maging choosy kung hindi ka yummy” as a joke, but it’s also hard to imagine a self-respecting person who actually subscribes to this teaching (but with Valentine’s being just a month away, who knows?). The thing is, everyone and everything will take a toll on you. Whether it’s lovers, friends, jobs, parties, lifestyles, engagements, projects — you name it, they will all eat your time and your energy, keep you away from other opportunities, and give you problems you wouldn’t otherwise have. So cut the mediocre crap and choose the troubles that are worthy of your life. Make only the commitments that set you free. When the going gets tough, you’ll at least want to be sure.

Love the haters

It’s good to receive heartwarming buckets of praise, but the token negatrons are there to remind you that you will never, ever please everybody. You don’t risk being disliked. You already have it coming, and it doesn’t matter where you choose to stand. Haters set you free. They’re there to make sure you don’t get too attached to being in people’s good graces, and to keep bringing you back to that place where you’re simply doing your thing, complete with the middle finger attitude. Best place to be.

Don’t take your issues too seriously

By the time we hit our 20s and beyond, we’re all damaged. We’ve been hurt, wronged, disappointed, teased, rejected, humiliated, left out in the cold, and consequently developed our own set of insecurities and complexes. Either that or we’re worried sick about how life isn’t happening to us. The point is, you’re not as especially screwed as you think. We’re all fucked up, which also means we’re all just fine.

Live to inspire

Let us not even start to pretend that we have what it takes to be role models. You have to be general patronage material for that, and we’re pretty sure you have a Facebook photo history that would prove otherwise. The good news is that it doesn’t matter what kind of lifestyles we indulge in, or how socially acceptable our beliefs and sexual preferences have become. Besides, what business do we have wanting converts and people to follow in our footsteps? Live in such a way that it doesn’t even matter how different you are, because through you people are moved to do their thing.

Just give ‘em what you’ve got

We all fantasize about being the kind of person who’s at the top of his game and knows exactly how to deliver. You’d think we would have gotten there by now, but no. Ito na yun. We will always have to live with a degree of uncertainty about ourselves and feel like we don’t know enough. We will continue to find reasons to scramble and struggle. I’m here trying to give you inspirational New Year’s advice when just a few hours ago I had nothing solid to say. Plus I was worried sick about sounding too touchy-feely for such an edgy section. “Why don’t I just pitch my cheese to Chicken Soup for the Soul?” But here we are, from one pseudo life expert to the next.

Don’t get too worked up about “getting it right” because there really is no such thing.  In fact, if you don’t come up with something, there’ll be nothing to deem wrong or right. Someone once told me that real confidence isn’t knowing that you have it all together. It’s being unsure, knowing everything you don’t know, and daring to get the job done anyway. Just give the world what you have to give every single time, and trust that you’ll be able to figure the rest out as you go. None of us really know what we're doing.

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Tweet the author @catedeleon.

 

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