Notes from the dressing room: I wanna see your peacock!

MANILA, Philippines - Overheard backstage: “Ang lamig, tumitigas nipples ko!” It’s a bit chaotic backstage at this year’s Cosmopolitan Bachelor Bash. It’s Cosmopolitan Philippines’ 10th anniversary and they’re making sure that everything is perfect for their jungle-themed event. I had fun watching last year’s show but wasn’t able to get to go backstage. This is the first time I’m seeing so many (almost) naked men up close.

The models are getting nervous. They’re all fussy with their airbrush-enhanced abs, the layers of foundation on their faces, and the gunk in their hair, to the point that some of them bump into us. It’s a little overwhelming for me, but when I look to my right, I see my best gay friend, Nyko, absolutely not complaining and clicking away on his camera. I remember that I agreed to do this for him, take a deep breath, and decide to look directly at the men. It’s actually fun to stare and take pictures of their bodies, making them a little uncomfortable. Guys stare at girls all the time. It’s wonderful to be able to turn the tables on them at least once a year.

Wonder what he needs that plastic bag for

Animal-print briefs, oiled-down torsos, last-minute weights and push-ups — they’re all gearing up as if they’re about to go hunting when we know they’re tonight’s prey. There are models, rock stars, TV personalities, all stripping before stepping on stage and subjecting themselves to the screaming crowd, a crowd equipped with water guns to target their prey of choice. The men may be wearing their skimpy, jungle-inspired outfits, but it’s the women who will be going wild tonight.