Love my own

MANILA, Philippines - It’s a selfish misconception that Valentine’s Day belongs only to those “happy in love,” or to the google-eyed couples. In a twisted sense of irony, instead of celebrating romance, most have a keen aversion to the love holiday, finding it more than depressing, irritating, unnecessary, and commercialized. Of course, that could come from the bitterness of most being single, but hey — I’m comfortably with someone but I can so totally relate.

Not that I’m the Scrooge of the Cupid season, but I honestly feel that it doesn’t take just one day to make everyone else feel special. It’s a work in progress. And I’m against the fact that having a day devoted to love actually alienates the singletons (making them feel resentful) and magnifies the fact that they’re abysmally alone. It’s not unusual to find single women bemoaning their plight as if they’re the last girls in the entire wedding party conspicuously standing in the middle to catch the bouquet — left behind by time and with their biological clocks ticking. Hmm, don’t think that helped at all.

Being single has the age-old conception of tortured, all-consuming alone-ness. But the forward-thinking happy singles of this generation know very well that being by themselves is not a pitiful state but an empowering position. (No expectations, no disappointments, no fights!) It means that they’re strong enough to be independent, that they’re taking their time to know themselves, that they’re having fun and not stopping their lives just because love hasn’t happened, and that their happiness doesn’t depend on someone else’s attention.

What I’m trying to say is, loving yourself is the best relationship to build the groundwork for everything else. This is a piece for the Team Single. I’m on your side. Hearts Day, after all, is also your day. And lucky for me, Manila’s hottest eligibles (and when I say eligible, they’re drop dead gorgeous, smart, witty, funny and super interesting, THE catch in other words) slowed down to a halt to show some love, reaffirming that being single is ultracool, and that love, indeed, is all around.

Anna Canlas, 22

Editorial assistant, writer

I love it when... I receive handwritten letters, or find a new song no one else knows about just yet. I guess I have a thing for the analog and the obscure, ‘cause I tend to be territorial about my favorites. Plus, it’s always exciting to find that one-in-20 who knows what song that lyric you posted came from! But be warned, “Just because s/he likes the same bizarre crap that you do, doesn’t mean s/he’s your soulmate.”

I love people who ... can be genuinely happy for other people’s successes. I just feel that some people fall into the trap of measuring themselves up against others  rather than doing well on their own. But there’s enough fabulosity to go around!

I love myself ... in shirts that masquerade as dresses. Ha Ha! Guilty!

Liz Uy, 27

Fashion editor, stylist

I love it when... I surround myself with family and friends (who showers me with much love).

I love people who... stimulate me intellectually.

I love myself... Every single day.

Leeroy New, 24

Sculptor, designer

I love it when ... I’m on a creative roll. Constant creative production is the desired mode of action for me. Efforts to realize a good design or art idea are always an exhilarating challenge.  

I love people who ... are able to intimidate me. The effect usually is you’re driven out of complacency. It’s the best kind of intimidation and more like a challenge to exceed yourself. 

I love myself when ... I feel I’ve produced excellent work. And the corresponding pats on the back from peers, whose opinions you respect, just add to it.

Jigs Mayuga, 31

Make-up artist

I love it when ... I get to see friends and loved ones in the middle of the week despite my busy schedule. I think it’s essential to touch base with the important people in my life every once in a while. It keeps me sane and reminds me how lucky I am to be surrounded by friends who care about me.

I love people who ... are spontaneous yet know how to take care of themselves and their bodies. It shows that these people know how to enjoy their lives and care about the quality of their health.

I love myself ... because I am unique and I treat each and every person I meet with the same kindness and respect that I do myself because each person is special in his own way.

Erwan Heussaff, 23

Operations coordinator, Asia Pacific Region

I love it when ... I find myself alone in a kitchen staring at a thousand fresh ingredients with no idea of what I’m about to cook, but with the anticipation of knowing that the possibilities are seriously endless. I love it when I’m able to say that I love my profession without having to lie.

I love people who ... are willing to spontaneously pack up a duffel bag and drive for no apparent reason while listening to good music, top down with nothing but a stretch of boring pavement ahead of us and passing landscapes at our sides. I love people for whom silence is not an issue but a comfort.

I love myself ... when I manage to say the right thing at the right time, those moments when everything inexplicably fits, when the person you are talking to pauses and ponders what was just stated. I wasn’t ever able to describe this feeling up until I read a book that defined it perfectly. Those moments of eerie quiet, when everything is right, when realization sinks in, when we simply feel “infinite.” If you still don’t get it, try and remember the very last scene of the movie The Graduate or listen to The Smiths.

Georgina Wilson

Model/VJ

I love it when ... I’m happy. I also love it when I meet new people or rediscover old friends and I have that moment where I think “I’m really happy to have this person in my life.”

I love people ... who are driven, successful, and intelligent. I love learning from others especially those who have travelled the world and led interesting lives.

I love myself because ... I challenge myself. I love that I’m not afraid to be pulled out of my comfort zone and explore/live in new cities without knowing what to expect. I usually end up falling in love with the people and the place.