A ceremony that cost only P4 yields 50 years of marriage

MANILA, Philippines - We were pen pals at the start. Pong, then a cadet at the Philippine Military Academy (PMA) in Baguio, saw my picture in the locker of my nephew. All cadets in the academy are required to display in their locker the picture of a woman — mother, sister, friend, a movie star or whoever.

It so happened that my eldest sister’s son Rogie placed my small picture in his locker.

We were about the same age and went to elementary and high school together in Baguio City.

 “What is your relationship with the girl in the picture, “ he asked Rogie. When he learned I was his auntie, he asked to be introduced.

That started seven months of letter writing.

We finally met a few days before Christmas. The cadets were on holiday break and he came to visit me in my dorm. Of course, I was totally impressed with his height and good manners.

It wasn’t love at first sight. He was in civilian clothes but I wasn’t too impressed with the way he dressed up. This kind of gentleman with brains and personality was my top choice for a boyfriend or a husband to be. He was then in his third year yearling.

That Christmas and New Year we spent together as friends. He revealed to me that he had a girl friend for the past seven years, but we continued to write to each other. Sometimes, I was a contributor of short stories or poems about friendship in their PMA Corps magazine.

Out of the blue, a year before graduation, he mentioned in his letter that he would marry me. I was dumbfounded because I knew he had a girlfriend.

True enough, we got married three days after graduation. It was a simple civil ceremony in Binangonan, Rizal.

My nephew was our ninong.

Why a civil ceremony? It cost us only P4. He had just graduated and I was a working student. I worked as executive secretary during the day and at night I went to school at the University of Sto. Tomas taking up Commerce.

After graduation, PMA graduates have only a two-week break before they are assigned to duty. For Pong, it was months sea duty training. He was under the Philippine Navy then.

On Dec. 3, 1961 we were finally married at Camp Aguinaldo Chapel with most of his classmates drawing their sabers for us. That was one of the most memorable events in my life. God has been kind to us. He blessed us with three beautiful children: Richie, Rino and Ruffy.

As a military wife, it was not always a life of comfort and glamour. First, there was very limited budget to make both ends meet. Second, the pangs of pain due to the absence of my husband got worse whenever one of the kids got sick. Third, there was that constant fear that I might lose him in combat.

Then there were also long absences due to school in 1964. He went for a six-month combat and intelligence course in Okinawa, Japan. My second child Rino was just eight months then. In 1969, Pong was away for a year taking an Amphibious Warfare course in Quantico, Virginia USA. My children and I were alone. I was an orphan, my parents had long passed away. It was the constant writing to each other that kept Pong and I together.

On Aug. 24, 1969, Pong and I were able to get quarters inside the Navy Village in Fort Bonifacio. We were extremely happy to be blessed with a five-bedroom home with a wide lawn. It was a great change from our shabby place in Pasay City.

In spite of the constant change of assignments, the distance and long absences, we got in touch every night on a single-band radio. Then, when the children were big enough to travel, we would visit him in Mindanao to show the kids how he lived and worked. As the saying goes, “If Mohammed cannot go to the mountain, the mountain must go to Mohammed.”

By 1989, all our three children had finished college and settled down. Our daughter is an international flight attendant, Rino is a computer analyst in Canada and the youngest Ruffy is the Commissioner of the Bureau of Customs.

Pong and I were by ourselves in our quarters at Fort Bonifacio. I decided to go back to work.

Ex-President Corazon Aquino appointed me as a board member of the Movie Television and Classifaction Board (MTRCB). I was there for a good 17 years, under three Presidents until I opted to resign on June 30, 2000 to attend to my official functions as a senator’s wife and to take care of the home front.

We celebrated our 50th anniversary in the same Camp Aguinaldo chapel where we wed. I am proud to say I weathered the strongest storms yet I stood on tierra firma.

I have stood by my man as he rose from 2nd lieutenant to a four-star general. Pong was excellent in the field as company commander, as battalion and brigade commander, PMA superintendent, marine commandant, as a commanding general of the National Capital Defense Command where he played a vital part to defend our Constitution during the 1989 coup attempts.

To be the chief of staff of the Armed Forces of the Philippines is every officer’s dream. But only a few can achieve such a dream. Pong is one of the few.

I was quite hesitant about his entry into politics in 1992 but I finally gave in. It was his happiness and I wanted him to be happy as we watch the sunrise and sunset of our lives together.