What's the right age for preschool?

Dear Nanay,

What is the correct age for a child to go to school? I believe in sending the children to preschool early, at even two or three years old, because I think it stimulates their brains and eventually makes them smarter. But my husband thinks it is a waste of money because they don’t really study anything in preschool anyway and he thinks it is just another expensive kind of daycare. — HTR

Dear HTR,

As with most things, I think that parents need to find a balance among the incredible number of different options that we are all given today. Nung panahon namin, wala namang mga preschool (We didn’t have preschool during our time). Basta nursery at kindergarten lang. Now, it seems normal that our children and grandchildren are going to school at an earlier age. Truly, even the lives of our children are becoming more complicated.

Having said that, I do not think that preschool is necessary for children’s later success in life. However, I also think it would be very unfair to call preschool “just another expensive kind of daycare.” Preschool curricula have come very far and have evolved a lot over the past years and I do not think that there is any doubt that it can definitely help the development of children.

I also do not think that children have to be “studying” in order to be “learning,” especially when they are very young. As a matter of fact, it may be just as important for kids to play and socialize with other kids as it is for them to study. At this young and tender age, play is a very important way for our kids learn. And without a doubt, socialization and development of emotional quotient (EQ) is probably just as important as the development of the more traditional intelligence quotient (IQ).

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, if you are really concerned about education and academics, arguably more important than preschool is what you teach your child at home. At most, a young child will stay in preschool for only a couple of hours each day. That leaves over 20 hours at home. And it can be argued that what he learns in those 20 hours at home with you will be far more important than what he learns in his two hours in school.

Sincerely,

Nanay

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…and the right age to go back to work

Dear Nanay,

On behalf of your many readers, thank you for enlightening us on how to get a job online these past few weeks. I am sure many of your readers will benefit from the advice that you, the Philippine STAR and your other readers gave.

However, my situation is actually sort of the opposite. I wanted to ask you what age you think is acceptable for work-at-home mothers like me to move on and find a regular job? Our kids are four and six right now and it feels like a good time to start job hunting because the kids are older already and no longer so dependent on me. More and more, they can do things with just their yaya and are requiring less and less of attention from me. — Ana

Dear Ana,

I think what you should do will depend on your situation and that of your family. You need to take a serious look at what you can and cannot do and what you are willing and not willing to do.

For example, some things you may want to consider include: who will take care of the kids and become the primary caregiver while you are at work? How completely do you trust this new primary caregiver? In terms of finances, does it matter if you continue your stay-at-home job or if you seek “normal” employment elsewhere? Do you really prefer to do regular office work instead of stay-at-home work? Why are you choosing one over the other?

After you consider some of your answers to the above questions, then you can start formulating a more well-rounded and reasonable answer to your question.

From experience, I have found that questions such as yours rarely have a clear cut and dry answer. Kalimitan, hindi naman basta “oo” o “hindi” ang sagot (Often, the answer is not a simple yes or no). Usually, a final decision will be reached with some compromises that have to be made and some pros and cons that have to be weighed. In the end, you need to think about what factors are most important to you, what you can do to achieve those goals while not having to make excessively unreasonable compromises.

Sincerely,

Nanay

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If you have a question, email us at asknanay@nationalbookstore.com.phor just drop your letter at drop boxes in all National Book Store branches nationwide.