A kiss
The most memorable kiss I ever had was the kiss I gave my dad on my wedding day. That was the least expensive gift of gratitude and his response was also a kiss, one of relinquishment in unselfish surrender to an ingénue’s preference for another man. How come I’m on to the topic of kissing? Because everybody’s kissing one another, even upon first meeting, after “Hello, how do you do?” It’s usually seen as a gesture of kindness between women or between girls, but between boys and girls or women and men, the opening kiss is out of sync.
A teen’s mom said to me, “I can’t understand why some young kids in high school are kissing each other socially. I never did.” Neither did I in high school, and I danced one meter away from every boy. So what’s a kiss to me? A kiss is a warm greeting. It can be a peck on the cheek filled with good intentions. A kiss can be a wonderful submission to someone’s charm. It’s a show of appreciation, when you — a woman — offer your cheek to be kissed.
Kissing is socially acceptable, but it’s good to be cautious regarding whom we kiss, because a kiss may not be sincere all the time. You and I shouldn’t kiss anyone just to comply socially nor return the kiss of anyone we’re not familiar with nor one who doesn’t mean much to us. Otherwise, we cheapen our kiss. Besides, we end up being untrue to ourselves.
I recall the story about a fashion gal dressed like a harlequin with stiff and sharp starched ruffles around her neck. She was kissed matter-of-factly by a woman. Well, the social kisser found her lips in midair kissing a ruffle and cutting her upper lip. I think that was a suspended kiss, or maybe even a pretentious kiss. Some women prefer the former. With their makeup or clearer complexions they don’t want their cheeks contaminated with bacteria or soiled by a lipstick mark. So lips are halted midair with an audible “Mwah!”
Some men don’t want a lipstick marks on their cheek either. If they’re going to get into trouble it might as well be two lips on his lips. And a woman should be the first party to indicate that she welcomes a kiss. The woman presents her lips by tilting her face upward without moving it to either side, so the gentleman has no choice but to perform. Lip kissing is indeed a lady’s choice. A gentleman should not pull her closer to him, even ever so lightly; please wait for your cue, guys.
The power of kissing can be dangerous. Kisses can lead to — wow — social chaos! From that first sign of passion when two people embrace and their blood pressure rises and hormones go on alert, the euphoria it creates is tremendous. Bang — here’s trouble!
How about symbolic kisses? Like the Mafia kiss that sometimes means sure death? Kissing a religious or a secular leader can show loyalty and full trust. Kissing dice for luck in a casino seems silly, but it’s done. A mother’s kiss can drive the hurt away and that’s what makes a child run along until his next injury. A kiss of farewell brings peace and security — you’ll want to literally hold it on your cheeks forever — and who doesn’t want to awaken Sleeping Beauty with a kiss?
Two cheeks to kiss? More European or Middle Eastern? Right cheek then left cheek and even the right cheek again. Three kisses. How about the hand? It’s safer and one is less susceptible to catching a kisser’s cold. It’s like the chivalrous kisses of Sir Walter Raleigh and Sir Lancelot: oh, so romantic.
The effect of a kiss is always memorable and everlasting and I believe kissing leads us to the language of maturity and sophistication as well as back to infancy, because a kiss is like a pendulum with memories swinging between childhood and adulthood. In primitive times, women chewed food for their babies and passed this to their children’s mouths so they could chew and eat more easily. From this maternal gesture, mother and child ended up with a show of affection that, perhaps, turned into a sweet kiss. Kisses bond, soothe and give comfort, reassuring an infant and adult of being loved.
Every kiss from infancy onward reverberates with feelings of attachment and satisfaction but they can also mean distaste or betrayal — like the infamous “Judas kiss” — depending who does the kissing and its intentions. Really, how powerful a kiss can be! And how wonderful that there are kisses that forgive misdemeanors and smile at our mistakes. When you want a nagging woman to stop, just kiss her on the lips: no words can come after that.
Kisses are ever-present in office situations, too, and so we should ask, “Am I kissing a friend or a superior?” So respect from the bottom must be observed. Your boss is above you, and may not want any intimate familiarization, particularly from those with pending cases and office delinquencies.
A kiss, like a brush of the hand, leaves a tingling sensation that sends out signals that must not be misunderstood. The basic pleasure of touch is felt in many ways and could be misconstrued. But for me, the best kiss is from my favorite tykes. When they’re busy playing I like to interrupt them, rather like being a nuisance to them to reassure myself of their affection. So I say, “Stop! Give me a kiss.” They drop everything they’re doing. Five kisses from little boys. Wow! And my heart goes throb… throb… throb.
