True love, tadhana: Ride-share driver shares how he married his pen pal
MANILA, Philippines — Before the internet, couples would send each other love letters. Admirers would woo their crushes with sweet notes and wait excitedly if the postman would deliver a reply. This past Valentine’s Day season, PHLPost encouraged this tradition by offering a special Love Month stamp featuring pastel colored teddy bears designed by children’s book author and illustrator Beth Parrocha.
Grab Driver Danilo A. said that love letters were effective in courting his long-time pen pal who later became his wife. “Pen pal ko siya, hindi kami nag-meet until malapit na kaming ikasal.”
Danilo was in Grade 6 in Pampanga when he started writing to a girl in Roxas City.
His neighbors, who were a few years older than him told him to write to their cousin in Roxas City, and that started a correspondence that lasted through the years. "Nung nag-high school ako, ang mga kaklase ko, naghanap din ng mga pen pal nila kasi nakita nila ang ganda ng pen pal ko. Scented pa ang mga papel nila, ako yellow pad lang kasi walang pera. Pero wais naman ako, gumugupit ako ng rose tapos dinidikit ko sa sulat. Dun naman siya bumilib. May effort."
He courted her in earnest when he was in second year college in 1979, and she initially accepted his intentions but suddenly cut communication. Then, he left for Saudi Arabia in the 1980s on a two-year contract, during which time he wrote to other pen pals to pass the time. “Nuong 1985, naalala ko siyang sulatan. Hindi naman nagbago 'yung address niya. At saka alam mo naman noon, basta ilagay mo na Roxas City, mahahanap siya ng kartero. Boom, sumagot!”
His pen pal was surprised to hear from him, and they caught up with each other through their letters. “Tinanong niya kung may family na ako, sabi ko sa sulat, ‘Oo. Nanay ko, Tatay ko, at mga kapatid’.” He joked.
Since they were both single, he proposed to her in writing. “The whole time, palitan lang kami ng litrato. Ni hindi ko narinig ang boses niya, kasi mahal ang long distance noon.”
Before accepting his proposal, his pen pal traveled to his home and met with his family, wanting to check if everything he was saying is true. “Baka daw kasi may asawa naman ako na tinatago,” he laughed.
His family approved of her. “Ang tatay ko, tuwang tuwa, kasi ang ganda daw niya. Magkakaroon na daw kami ng lahi na maputi at matangos ang ilong!"
He returned to the Philippines in 1986. “Pag-uwi ko, first time, naming magkita, kinasal kami.”
He brought her to Saudi Arabia with him, where they stayed for nine years. They have been happily married for 37 years, with two children, and uses the word “tadhana” or fate when talking about their love story.
He has this advice for those still looking for their "tadhana."
"Ang dali ngayon makipag-kaibigan. May makita ka sa Facebook na tipo mo, alamin mo, kilalanin mo. Makikita mo naman later on kung worth it. Kasi kung hindi mo hahanapin, hindi mo makikita,” he said.
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