Feeling like sludge

I don’t know what I did yesterday except attend a lunch meeting with my Rizal cousins.  I know I ate a lot but I was so hungry when I got there and the food took so long.  Anyway, I left feeling stuffed.  Then when I got home and went to my kitchen to tidy up I had a slight bout of dizziness.  Nothing to worry about.  It didn’t make me fall down and faint.  But after that all I wanted to do was sit down at my computer and play Free Cell.  Yes, I am still addicted to Free Cell.

 But I began to not feel well. My muscles ached, my head ached, my nose was runny and I began to cough. I took my paracetamol, vitamin C and Chinese cough syrup, went to bed to read but fell asleep. I woke up feeling cold. So I covered myself with a monkey-printed flannel blanket that I fell in love with because that’s my Chinese horoscope. I’m a monkey.

 I think I got up six times to go to the bathroom. I suffered chills followed by  sweats, then I had to change my T-shirt because I had gotten all wet. You know how annoying it is to have to get up six times at night? But every time I got up I looked out my window and the lights spread out from San Juan to Manila Bay just took my breath away. Soon it will be six months since I moved in but nevertheless the view at night still takes my breath away. This flat has a lovely view.

Even in the morning the view is breathtaking. When I wake up the first thing I do is open the sliding door to my workroom, next door to my bedroom. There the view is different. It extends to Quezon City. It also has a strong breeze but not so strong as the porch outside my living room. There I see all sorts of houses and condominiums. There I see the MRT or LRT as it crosses EDSA.  Sometimes on Sunday afternoons I sit on the porch outside my bedroom, one strip with the porch outside my workroom, and just stare out at the life down below me, the little cars driving past, the motor bikes, the fire engines, everyone going somewhere while I just sit and watch and wonder.

 I almost always wake up early. Usually I am up and about at six in the morning. I make myself some coffee then bring my cup to my porch outside the living room. During this season, when you open the door that early, the air is cold. I wonder if that’s why the barangay just across the street from me is called Little Baguio. It reminds me of the coolness of the air in Baguio when I was a child, when Baguio was a beautiful mountain resort, not as crowded as it is now.

 There are times when I sit at my table on the porch for a while just enjoying the view, sometimes reading, other times planning my day. But there are times when I feel it is too dangerous for me to do that. Like today, Wednesday. There is a storm, Inday, I think, hovering and the air is so strong. It makes two terrible noises. One is rather shrill, like a lyric soprano vocalizing and threatening to shatter your eardrums.  It gets on my nerves but there’s nothing I can do about it. That’s the sound of nature, a creation of God. The other voice is deeper a baritone trying to scare you out of your wits. It succeeds with me.

Is it always like this here? I asked one of the maids who took the elevator with me.

Ay, ma’am, ganyan talaga ang ingay dito.  Over time you will get used to it. Don’t worry.

Yes, sure, I tell myself.

One of the maintenance people told me that they built this condominium thinking typhoons would only have strength of number three, I guess he meant signal number three. But now it is up to number five. If things get bad just call us, we can come and help you move your furniture as far as possible indoors and ask you to leave your glass doors open. Omigod! Then everything will be completely wet.

 Well, today I woke up feeling sick, no fever, but sick. I watched the news on TV and heard about the doctor who saved almost a thousand people from Ebola virus but died of the virus. Oh no, maybe I have the Ebola virus even if I haven’t been to Liberia or Nigeria. No, no, how can I have it?  I just have the flu, my annual bout that strikes when the weather changes. And I decide to write about it to let you all know that even I have days when I turn to sludge but in the end I live.

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