Wanted: Good house contractor

I am a foreigner in this country and have been living here with my wife for the past three years as an employee of a shipping company. My wife is Filipina. Last year, my wife and I bought a townhouse that needed a lot of repairs and renovations. We hired a contractor recommended to me by someone in the office. It was a disaster from the very start. I fired him halfway through the project even if I had paid him close to a million pesos in downpayment. Now, I am left without a contractor with my townhouse barely completed. My company is paying for my house right now, but I have to move out in three months or so, when the lease expires. I wouldn’t take recommendations anymore from any one in the office as I realized (it was a costly mistake) that people here recommend not on the basis of skill but on pakikisama. I want to hear a recommendation from an objective individual who has had some experience in renovating and building. Could you recommend a good contractor who is reasonable in price and has had a lot of experience in his biodata? – Frustrated Expat

I live in a condominium complex and during my last move, I had to renovate big time! It took me two contractors, some good money and a lot of wasted energy to find the one who was worth it. Five people in the building whose units he has done recommended him so I decided to try him out and to my surprise, he lived up to their recommendation. He is so good that the building’s administration would give me permission to do some improbable feats (like putting an aircon compressor on a ledge outside a window as long as it is covered by a wall) if this contractor would give his go signal. They trust his judgment as he is honest in giving his assessment of the situation. If you are interested in this recommendation, this is the company and number to call: Heredith Enterprises. Look for the owner, Herman Moral, tel. no. 916-5543. He will definitely live up to your expectations.

* * * It’s Not Unmanly To Cry

My friend Harry only cries at funerals. Sometimes, he hardly knew the person who died. Last weekend, we were at a funeral of a young, beautiful girl and he was crying like he knew her intimately. Actually, he hardly knew her personally, he just came to accompany me. I asked him why he was crying so loud as it seemed so inappropriate. He thought about it for awhile and said he thought that it was a place where crying was socially acceptable and he could therefore let go and cry about a lot of issues in his life that he wanted to cry about but couldn’t for fear of feeling like a weakling. So he reserves his pent-up ill feelings till he goes to a funeral. I think it is sad that he has to store it up until he has the opportunity to go to a funeral. What can I advise him so that he can cry when he feels like it without feeling that he’d lose his machismo? – Gil

Tell him that crying is cleansing. It removes pollutants from the body. According to a study cited by Robert Ornstein in the Healing Brain, an analysis of human tears emitted because of pain or joy shows a different chemical makeup from tears emitted because of eye irritations or cutting up an onion. "Real" tears contain higher levels of toxic substances that the body is evidently eliminating through crying, so it’s a good way of getting rid of the "junk" our bodies accumulate. Another interesting fact cited by Paul Pearsall in Superimmunity is that deep and prolonged crying in men has been found to normalize testosterone levels. High testosterone levels play a role in aggressive and competitive behavior and have been shown to be connected to strokes and heart attacks. So tell your friend not to be afraid to let go of his ill feelings by crying. When it’s time to cry, let go of your tears because it’s the healthy thing to do, is a very useful stress reducer and doesn’t make you less of a man!