Dual income, no kids (DINK): What drives couples to choose it and how do they stay committed?
MANILA, Philippines — In the Philippines, getting married and having kids have been the usual choice for Filipinos. However, for some couples, embracing the DINK (dual income, no kids) dynamic represents a conscious choice towards a lifestyle centered on personal fulfillment and shared goals. It’s about cherishing the freedom to pursue careers, hobbies, and maybe even adventures while nurturing the bond between partners.
This shift coincides with the decline in birth rates and the Total Fertility Rate, indicating changing attitudes toward family planning in the Philippines.
But what makes the DINK life appealing to couples nowadays? We caught up with three married couples to get their insights on why they've chosen this path, and here are some of their hot takes:
Financial stability and flexibility
The decision to embrace the DINK lifestyle often begins with a focus on financial stability and personal freedom. Some couples are opting out of parenthood to prioritize their financial well-being and the ability to live life on their own terms.
Even before the widespread internet popularity of the term "DINK," JM Conopio-Maceda and her spouse, Jave Maceda, had already chosen this lifestyle as their preferred path in marriage.
Raised in a family where financial constraints were a daily reality, 35-year-old freelance creative director JM learned early on the importance of being financially prepared for the responsibilities of starting a family. This background deeply influenced her views on finances and family planning, guiding the decisions she and Jave made together.
“When Jave and I decided to get married, I explained to him my views on (not) raising a family—and though he initially wanted to have kids, we got to a point in our relationship where the lifestyle we are enjoying now is really the best setup for both our personalities, means and priorities,” she shared.
According to JM, being in a dual-income relationship provides a safety net and more flexibility when it comes to shared financial responsibilities at home.
“It’s always beneficial to have an accountable partner for certain duties. Additionally, since both of our incomes may not fit the traditional mold of professional fields, we automatically cover for each other when needed,” she explained.
“We consult each other on major decisions that affect us both but we also value the space and freedom to make personal choices. For us, this is the best aspect of being a DINK—it's always just the two of us to consider, whether it’s in the present or future,” she added.
Fun in freedom
For nurse couple Fatima and Russ, the decision to embrace the DINK lifestyle came after a year of cherishing their time together as a couple, reveling in the freedom and joy of not having to juggle additional responsibilities.
Fatima, 25, emphasizes the sense of liberation that comes with not having children. "I saw how free childless couples are. They can travel freely and do whatever they want, buy whatever they want without worrying about a kid who is under their responsibility," she shares.
With their busy professional lives, Fatima and Russ find that not having kids gives them more time to nurture their relationship.
"On our downtime, Russ would cook our meals, we watch movies and TV shows while eating, we play games, and if I am not on-call, we would go to different places and try different restaurants or book experiences we could share," Fatima said. "All these help us remain committed to this setup because again, there are no kids holding us back."
Russ, 27, echoes her sentiments and emphasizes how being free from the responsibilities of raising a child actually strengthens their relationship.
"In this economy, it's difficult to afford kids. It's too expensive," he notes. Without this major responsibility, they can do much more. "The more things we do and the more places we go, the more excited I am for the future with her," Russ added.
Emotional maturity just as important
The same holds true for the couple Ia and Spencer. But beyond financial stability and freedom, 27-year-old virtual assistant Ia emphasizes the importance of emotional readiness when contemplating on starting a family.
“Will we be able to handle each other's emotions of having a child?” This is a question the couple has consistently pondered, weighing the significance of discussing and navigating the emotional complexities while assessing their preparedness for the journey ahead.
“Parents have to be at a certain level of emotional maturity so they don’t pass down generational trauma, and we don’t believe we are at that point right now,” she explains.
According to her, they want to give themselves more time by discussing how they should proceed and preparing step by step, rather than rushing and potentially realizing they were not emotionally equipped to handle raising children.
Like other couples, Ia and Spencer devote their time to each other and their beloved dog, who holds a special place in their lives and accompanies them on vacations, dining out, and socializing with friends—all without the added concern of children.
Navigating through pressures together
The importance of family is undeniable in the Filipino culture, prompting inquiries about marriage and parenthood. Once married, the focus shifts to when the couple will have children, adding pressure to conform to societal expectations.
For DINK couples, navigating these expectations can be challenging, especially during family gatherings. However, they stress the significance of communication, collaboration and commitment in embracing the DINK lifestyle.
When faced with questions, DINK couples communicate their aspirations and contentment with their chosen lifestyle. They emphasize that the decision was not impulsive, but the result of careful consideration and mutual agreement before marriage.
DINK done right: Safe, smart choices
Embracing the DINK lifestyle involves making informed decisions, particularly in contraception and family planning, to maintain their chosen lifestyle.
With contraceptive options available at different price points, couples can prioritize their sexual and reproductive health needs while remaining committed to their DINK lifestyle.
By opting for long-term contraception like IUDs, couples like Ia and Spencer prioritize their health and financial stability before considering parenthood. Similarly, Fatima and Russ prioritize open discussions and convenient contraception methods like condoms and pills.
Leading family planning brand TRUST Reproductive Health Choices provides access to a diverse range of sexual and reproductive health products, such as oral contraceptive pills, condoms, injectables, and IUD, ensuring that couples can make informed decisions about contraception that align with their preferences and goals.
Whatever reasons a couple may have for committing to the child-free life—whether it's personal goals, financial stability, or emotional readiness—the DINK lifestyle holds equal validity to having children. Ultimately, the decision to embrace DINK is one made through smart, careful family planning, and it's a journey that both partners genuinely desire and willingly commit to together.
Editor’s Note: This #BrandSpace story is created with TRUST Reproductive Health Choices. It is produced by the Advertising Content Team that is independent from our Editorial Newsroom.
