The Internet and our children

Here’s a letter from a very concerned parent. Hopefully, it will be an eye-opener for all of us. 

Dear Maricel, 

I would just like to know your stand regarding children’s exposure to the Internet, particularly the Friendster website. We all know that in order to successfully register or create a Friendster account, one has to be 18 years old, at least.  But is this strictly being followed? I’d have to say No!!! Based on my personal knowledge, here are some facts I gathered:   

• A 10-year-old girl created her own Friendster account, with parental consent, but registered herself as being of legal age. The viewing of her profile is, however, restricted to her “friends.”   

• A mother of three created Friendster accounts for her 11-year-old daughter, 10-year-old son, and, would you believe, six-year-old daughter? Of course, all of them were made to appear as aged 18 and above! See my point? We aren’t teaching the kids the right values here, when they can clearly see that their parents themselves lie about their ages just to be able to have Friendster accounts. What happened to “Never tell a lie, or else Mommy and Daddy will get mad” or “Always be truthful” of “Honesty is the best policy”?  We all know that the best way to teach kids is by example. It’s so sad to know that most kids now are so hooked on the Internet, IMs, videogames, PSPs... instead of playing outside, enjoying the sun, engaging in sports. We see kids making online acquaintances instead of personally bonding with their friends.  Aren’t they too young to be exposed to Friendster, Facebook, and the like?  Parents certainly aren’t around their kids 24/7,  What happens if the kids’ photos are “grabbed” for whatever purpose, or when a kid chats with an adult who happens to be a pervert? We are aware of child pornography online these days. Now that’s way too scary!!! 

I truly believe that kids need to be exposed to today’s technology — mobile phones, the Internet.  But how can we ensure safety? Anybody can tell all sorts of lies on the Internet, in chatrooms. No one will ever really know, or even care. My eight-year-old niece, a third grader, recently told me that a classmate asked her what her age was on Friendster. My niece just shrugged, and her classmate replied, “Me, I’m 19 na there!” 

Gosh!! I’m just a concerned individual. I used to work in a preschool, and I care so much about children.  I hate to think that we might be teaching them the wrong values without being really aware of it. 

Sincerely, 

Peachy Villamayor 

Dear Peachy, 

Thank you for your letter. Sadly, many parents do not actually know that in order for their children to sign up for certain accounts on the Internet, they must be of a certain age. Some are helping their children “lie” to get these accounts because they fail to realize the dangers behind the seemingly small white lie, believing that their kids just want to have fun online. Our children must be 18 to have a Friendster account, 13 years old or older to register as a member of Multiply or use the Multiply.com website or service. In order for them to go to certain clearly-labeled areas of the service that contain adult or mature content, they must be 18 years of age or older to access and view such areas. Facebook and Bebo set a minimum age limit of 13 for users to register online and Myspace sets the limit at 14. Parents have to set clear boundaries when it comes to the use of the Internet.  They must also be aware of the sites that their children frequent and must also monitor who they are constantly communicating with in the web.  You are right when you talked about parents being their children’s best example.  Parents must be firm on certain guidelines imposed by sites as they were placed there for a purpose. If the parents do not abide by them, they are actually endangering their children.

The Internet is a great tool for connecting, learning, and enriching one’s life, but it is also a very dangerous place for immature users.

Maricel 

* * *

One for the book

Kudos to my friend Kristin Canon whose new book Ang Tahimik na Mundo ni Bunso by Vibal Publishing is now available. It is a children’s picture book written in Filipino about the discovery of Bunso’s hearing loss and how the family helps their bunso to cope in the hearing world. Her two sons, who are both hearing-impaired, and other special children whom she works with at their school are her inspirations for this new story. She has not been vocal about her career as a children’s picture book author, but because of her children, she now feels that sharing this new book is a responsibility to them and those like them. Other books written by Tin are the award-winning Bakit Matagal ang Sundo Ko, Si Pilong Patago-tago, and another new release by Adarna House, Sampung Magkakaibigan.  Hope you all can support her cause. 

* * *

E-mail author at mommymaricel@gmail.com.