Loving the gorillas in our midst

Wrestling a gorilla is no easy task.

You don’t rest when you’re tired. You rest when the gorilla gets tired.–Manila Zookeeper

As I write this, I have just woken up from a much needed siesta. My husband Anthony has been down with the flu and sore eyes and has had to stay home for the last three days. Since then, life at home has been hectic. I have had to make sure the kids get to their different summer classes on time every day and that my husband is given enough care and attention for a speedy recovery.

I’ve also been very conscious about making Anthony’s surroundings clean and orderly and meeting his requests for merienda, medicine, etc. As usual, when things get hectic, the last person given attention is myself.

Towards noon, Anthony requested that I make myself beautiful just before guests arrive to see him. I told him I was not up to seeing anyone and wouldn’t come down to see the guests. He then emphasized that he wanted me looking beautiful (and not in my usual house clothes –batik shorts and super old shirt) for him and not for the guests or anyone else for that matter. Whew, off to the shower I went! One gorilla happy, four more to slay for the rest of the day.

Right before lunch, the children started to arrive and I shifted my focus on making sure they get welcomed and fed. I allowed them to play for a while and then warmed them up to take a nap.

Naps are not always welcomed by my super energetic kids especially when all sorts of things come up while I try to convince them to get some rest. I have made it a policy for the children to rest (not necessarily sleep but have a "do nothing" time in bed for at least half an hour) so that I won’t have to deal with their tantrums in the late afternoon when their tiredness surface and get uncontrollable. At the same time, this gives everyone a chance to re-charge for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, since taking a nap deprives more hours of play, I turn out looking like the villain. I encounter wild refusals, smooth talks, and I am asked to go to the bathroom or get water during the most inconvenient times – when my eyes are about to shut. The trick is not to have a tantrum myself. Many times, I’ve had to huff and puff my way to my bed when I feel like wanting to give up. When this happens, Anthony is quick to provide encouragement and hope. Soon, I’m up on my feet ready to face my kids.

I realized that when my attitude towards my kids is positive, I am able to get their cooperation and they do obey much faster. Before I know it, they are in deep slumber and I get to rest as well.

That hectic day, after a much-needed nap, the kids and Anthony were up and about and needed to be attended to. This time, I was more ready because I chose to befriend patience, perseverance and a positive attitude instead of welcoming distracting foes of tiredness, and impatience. May you do the same for the gorillas in your midst.

Have a great day!

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Three-year-old Hannah and her Daddy Anthony have a conversation.

H: Dad, who is president Bush?

A: He’s the president of America.

H: Why are so many people following him?

A: Cause he’s the president of a powerful country.

H: And he’s got the bullets?

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E-mail me your thoughts: mommytalk@businessworks.com.ph