Making more time for your spouse

One of the benefits of being alone with my husband for an extended period of time is discovering ways to love each other more. One of them is to make bonding a regular part of our schedule – not only during vacations. After our much-needed trip to Europe, we both vowed to make each other a priority. We decided to take each other out for a date either on a Friday or Saturday. This has helped me become more certain of our devotion to each other. As a result, I make it a point to keep those days sacred in my calendar. There are countless things a couple can do together. Don’t schedule meetings with other people, rather, it must be as exclusive as possible. After all, it’s an opportunity to rediscover each other. Distractions should be minimized. Texting should be done only when extremely necessary. I was so touched when Anthony decided to stash his cell phone in his closet on my birthday. I felt so special having his total and undivided attention. Dates with each other don’t have to be expensive or grandiose. It could be sharing the simplest things in life. I remember when my Kuya Joseph took his wife, Ate Vicky, for a tricycle ride (from her dental clinic at St. Luke’s) to the nearest ice cream parlor. It touched her so much because it reminded her of memories shared when they weren’t married yet. What matters most is that you share something to build you up as a couple.

I like what Anthony said: That we go out on a date every week, whether we like to be with each other or not. I suggest that you do the same. Here are some ideas you might want to consider for your date.

• See a movie – You may not share the same passion for the same movies but as you give in to each others’ tastes in what to watch, chances are you’ll get to enjoy your spouse’s choice of films. I personally am not too excited about gory action pictures but when I see how fired up Anthony gets watching such films, I can’t help but give in. He ends up being more open about watching drama/love stories with me which I enjoy so much.

• Eat out – Go to a new restaurant to try something different. It will give you a chance to discover new dishes that could lead to new topics for your conversation. Check out Citrio on Tomas Morato – they have beautiful works of art done by children and the ambience is cool with great food to boast. Uno in the Scout area is another favorite. You’ll feel special with the personal touch given by owner/head chef Mari Relucio. His wife Lea did the interiors and sewed the curtains herself. Truly homey classic food and atmosphere. You have to try The Barn on Katipunan. You’ll get your money’s worth with their sumptuous dishes in large servings. You’ll also feel young with the vibrant energy of couple Ronnie and Mariz Ricketts to greet you. Saraap!

• Have a spa day – You’ll find a spa at almost every corner of every commercial district. Not all spas are the same though. I’ve tried quite a few myself and one that I’ve enjoyed the most so far is The Urban Spa located at Shangri-La Plaza Mall. Anthony had to literally drag me there because I dreaded the thought of having myself pampered for half a day! I figured there were many other things I could do with so much time at the mall but I’m sure glad I submitted to this kind of date because it proved to be such a fulfilling experience. I fell in love with their interior as soon as I came in. The Urban Spa has a French motif (with owner Tessa Prieto-Valdes no less as interiors designer). Everything was coordinated, the ambience serene and the service fantastic. They even have a couple’s suite so you can get pampered together. You’ll be amazed to experience a taste of heaven for as low as P280 to as high as P2,150.

• Do some nature tripping – Ever heard of romantic stories about couples at the UP Campus Lagoon? Yes, you’ll find many couples there under rubber trees –many lost in each other’s embrace. Some in deep conversation while sitting on a mat laid out on the grass. It won’t cost you anything and strolling through its lush garden makes you grateful of God’s creations. Other places you could visit are: The Orchidarium in Luneta, Quezon Circle, and Greenbelt 3.

• Exercise! – You have a variety of activities to choose from like walking, playing badminton, biking, etc. The idea is to get fit together.

• Have a silent retreat – Spend the day or even half of it in silence with a sensitive heart to listen to God. Read passages from the Bible and other books related to what you want to discover about your direction in life or in your marriage in particular. Our friends Ammi and Leo Armas shared how refreshing this is to their souls and how this unique experience makes them deeply connected as a couple that puts their trust in God.

• Stay home and have a nothing day – When the kids are off to school and you’ve scheduled a relative or friend to care for the baby for the day, enjoy yourselves at home and do nothing.

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Schedules for the yaya seminar: March 29 at the Westgate Tower, Alabang and April 26, Avalon condominium. Text Vera at 0918-9293129.

Would love to hear from you. E-mail me your thoughts at: mommytalk@businessworks.com.ph.