Banking on family interests
March 28, 2005 | 12:00am
I trust you all had a meaningful and restful Holy Week and a euphoric Easter Sunday. I used to dread Holy Week when I was growing up. Holy Week meant hot days, long Masses, fasting, no meat, and (gasp) no TV (back then, all TV stations would shut down and there was absolutely nothing on-air). But over the years, I’ve come to appreciate the meaning of Holy Week. Oddly enough, I started looking forward to it. For busybodies like me, Holy Week is down time. I love being able to rest extensively while the rest of the world is also resting. Sometimes, when I take a leave, I can’t fully rest because the world doesn’t stop with me. Even when I’m on vacation, I get bothered by business calls, so I can’t totally enjoy some peace and quiet. But during Holy Week, you don’t get bothered that much because everyone else is taking a break.
And, of course, there’s the spiritual aspect that I love. Believe it or not, I now look forward to the prayers, the meditation, the Masses – and yes, even the sacrificing. Once in a while, it’s good to discipline oneself from the joys that this material world can offer. It’s a refreshing feeling. I know this may sound a little heretical but in some ways, I enjoy Holy Week more than I enjoy Christmas. Christmas is sometimes full of self-indulgent pleasures. Also, Christmas could be really chaotic, what with all the gift-shopping and countless reunions and parties. Holy Week is more serene and tranquil.
From a family perspective, Lent and Easter provides a more solemn and more sober mood to gatherings. During Christmas, there’s a lot of drinking, music, merrymaking, and eating during reunions. Not so during Lent. Unless you’re in Boracay partying, Lent offers a period of fewer distractions. There’s a lot more time spent on meditating, introspecting, reminiscing, soul-searching and bonding. And as party-pooper as this sounds, I really enjoy that more now. Somehow, the idea of partying the whole night and dancing the night away just doesn’t appeal as much as it used to. I like family bonding more. Yup, I must be getting old. But you know what? I like it.
And speaking of family bonding, last Holy Week, my wife and I went to Silay and spent some quality time with my in-laws, the Ledesmas. And there, I once again got immersed in the family ties of my wife. And I loved it.
I have always been interested in family ties. In our own Nepomuceno/Henson reunions in Angeles City, I always find myself in awe of the number of relatives I have. I am amazed by the different inter-connections – how this or that person is related to me – and I love the thrill of discovering that some people I deal with in business are actually my relatives. My cousin Marc Nepomuceno, the official family historian and genealogist, came up with this amazing book a number of years ago, entitled The Nepomucenos of Angeles City. I was fascinated by all the information – the various branches, the family history, the information on our great, great, great-grandfathers and mothers, how so-and-so was related to this person, etc. From the book, I was finally able to confirm that I am not related to Willie or Paeng after all – well, at least not closely related. There may still be a connection somewhere up the family tree. And from the same book, I learned that Ninoy Aquino is a fourth or fifth cousin of mine. By simple deduction, that makes Kris… my niece! Wowowee. Or should I say, "Game ka na ba?"
When I got married to a Ledesma from Silay three years ago, I suddenly found myself belonging to yet another huge family. And interestingly, it’s a family that equally treasures its roots and genealogy. The Ledesmas are quite a family. It seems that they are related to almost every clan in Negros! Wherever I go there, I inevitably meet someone who is somehow related to my wife’s family. When people find out I am married to Teemy Ledesma, I always get lines like, "Oh, Teemy? She is my cousin" or "Oh, Teemy? Her father is my mother’s third cousin" or "Oh, you’re Teemy’s husband? So you’re my sister-in-law’s in-law’s nephew-in-law!" Ever heard of the six degrees of separation theory? Well, in Bacolod, it’s two degrees of separation – tops! I used to spend countless hours with my father-in-law Nicolas Ledesma, talking about the history of the different Negros clans and their interconnections. I was totally fascinated because everyone I saw in the street was a potential relative.
The Ledesma relatives that particularly intrigued me were the Locsins, one of the pioneering clans of Silay. My father-in-law’s middle name was Locsin. During his wake last year, I had the chance to meet some of his Locsin cousins and relatives and I was overwhelmed at how they went out of their way to make me feel "right at home," even if I’m Kapampangan (I heard that historically, Kapampangans and Ilonggos tended to clash). One of the Locsins I had the privilege to meet was Nelia Locsin Puentevella-Jacinto, who, if I’m not mistaken, is a third cousin of my father-in-law. She introduced me to Lolita Locsin-Conching, who, at 81, is one of the matriarchs of the clan. Lola Lolita’s passion and zeal for the Locsin clan is quite extraordinary. In fact, I’d say it’s almost legendary. You’ve heard of the old adage "blood is thicker than water?" Well, she gives that saying a whole new meaning. She is so animated when it comes to her clan and its rich history. Through her, I learned that the Locsin genealogy starts in the year 1750, and that it is the only genealogy in Asia filed in the Genealogical Society of Utah, Yale and Syracuse Universities. How about that? They’ve been around for some time, haven’t they? During the first Locsin nationwide reunion back in 1974, more than 1,400 people attended – from as far north as Nueva Ecija to as far south as Davao and Zamboanga. Ramon Magsaysay awardee Raul Locsin, former second lady Celia Diaz-Laurel, actress Susan Roces, former Solicitor General Frank Chavez, staunch Marcos ally Roberto Benedicto and anti-Marcos activist and Free Press publisher Teodoro Locsin Sr. are all part of this illustrious clan.
"What’s so special about them?" you might be tempted to ask. After all, every clan in the country can somehow boast something that makes them unique. And most, if not all, would have the bragging rights of saying that they are somehow related to some popular or famous figure. Almost every full-blooded Pinoy takes pride in his/her family’s history, right? After all, that’s what we’re known for – our extended family ties.
Very true. But what strikes me about Lola Lolita and the Locsin clan is the way they have used the blood relationship within the clan as leverage not only to preserve the history of the clan (which is what most people do) but more importantly, to do positive works in society and serve the less fortunate. Lola Lolita, together with her relatives Marina Locsin Gamboa, Gloria Locsin Locsin, Carmen Locsin Kilayco and Connie Locsin Locsin continued the research on the family genealogy initiated by patriarch Carlos L. Locsin. In the process of doing so, they committed to establish a foundation – the Locsin Genealogy Foundation – that was to perpetuate the work of Carlos L. Locsin, and, at the same time, serve as a catalyst in helping ameliorate the living conditions of distressed citizens.
And for that, I tip my hat to the Locsin clan and to all other clans who still believe in the influence of families. Somehow, over the years, this type of family commitment to society has diminished over the years. A lot of families now only look after themselves. Instead of thinking what they can give to society, a lot of clans now tend to be clannish, particularly those families who have dabbled in business and have what I call the "what’s-in-it-for-the-family?" mentality. While, indeed, family must be the top priority for everyone, it doesn’t mean that family interests should be the only priority. Families, as the basic unit of society, must go beyond their house walls and think of their civic responsibilities.
Yes, charity begins at home. But charity certainly mustn’t end there. Families, especially financially successful ones, must always bear in mind that after the family needs have been met, the next step is not to further accumulate wealth for the benefit of the next generation. The next generation can take care of itself. Let them earn their keep. Let them appreciate the value of hard work. In a way, families must be like corporations – they should have a purpose for existing. And they should live that purpose. And it’s up to each family to determine what their purpose in society is. It’s not that easy. Sometimes, there could be family feuds. But it can be done. And it can be done precisely because there is a common denominator – you are all of the same blood.
My grandfather’s brother, Juan Nepomuceno, a very successful businessman and a civic leader, was once asked about his thoughts on a proposed business venture. You’d imagine that the first question he’d ask would be, "What’s the ROI?" or "What’s the capital required?" You know what his first question was? "How many jobs will be created with this new business?" How many businessmen still think this way? I really don’t know, but I bet there’s only a handful.
Bottom line is this – God has blessed all of us with families. And we should all be proud of our families. But let’s not end there. There’s a strong temptation to be self-indulgent and overly proud about one’s roots that we become almost narcissistic. In the Bible, people would tell the Lord, "We are children of Abraham." To which the Lord replied, "I could turn one of these stones into children of Abraham." It’s not where you belong that matters. It’s recognizing that we all belong to one big family that counts. And the more people in your family that you can convince on this, the closer you get to finding out the meaning of "family interest."
After all – if you think about it – our country is just one big family. Let’s do our part in making it a happy and loving family.
Thanks for your letters, folks! You may e-mail me at rodnepo@yahoo.com. By the way, the Locsin clan will be having another grand reunion on April 2 and 3 at the Sta. Teresita Academy, Silay City. If you happen to be part of the Locsin clan of Silay City, you know where to go.
And, of course, there’s the spiritual aspect that I love. Believe it or not, I now look forward to the prayers, the meditation, the Masses – and yes, even the sacrificing. Once in a while, it’s good to discipline oneself from the joys that this material world can offer. It’s a refreshing feeling. I know this may sound a little heretical but in some ways, I enjoy Holy Week more than I enjoy Christmas. Christmas is sometimes full of self-indulgent pleasures. Also, Christmas could be really chaotic, what with all the gift-shopping and countless reunions and parties. Holy Week is more serene and tranquil.
From a family perspective, Lent and Easter provides a more solemn and more sober mood to gatherings. During Christmas, there’s a lot of drinking, music, merrymaking, and eating during reunions. Not so during Lent. Unless you’re in Boracay partying, Lent offers a period of fewer distractions. There’s a lot more time spent on meditating, introspecting, reminiscing, soul-searching and bonding. And as party-pooper as this sounds, I really enjoy that more now. Somehow, the idea of partying the whole night and dancing the night away just doesn’t appeal as much as it used to. I like family bonding more. Yup, I must be getting old. But you know what? I like it.
And speaking of family bonding, last Holy Week, my wife and I went to Silay and spent some quality time with my in-laws, the Ledesmas. And there, I once again got immersed in the family ties of my wife. And I loved it.
I have always been interested in family ties. In our own Nepomuceno/Henson reunions in Angeles City, I always find myself in awe of the number of relatives I have. I am amazed by the different inter-connections – how this or that person is related to me – and I love the thrill of discovering that some people I deal with in business are actually my relatives. My cousin Marc Nepomuceno, the official family historian and genealogist, came up with this amazing book a number of years ago, entitled The Nepomucenos of Angeles City. I was fascinated by all the information – the various branches, the family history, the information on our great, great, great-grandfathers and mothers, how so-and-so was related to this person, etc. From the book, I was finally able to confirm that I am not related to Willie or Paeng after all – well, at least not closely related. There may still be a connection somewhere up the family tree. And from the same book, I learned that Ninoy Aquino is a fourth or fifth cousin of mine. By simple deduction, that makes Kris… my niece! Wowowee. Or should I say, "Game ka na ba?"
When I got married to a Ledesma from Silay three years ago, I suddenly found myself belonging to yet another huge family. And interestingly, it’s a family that equally treasures its roots and genealogy. The Ledesmas are quite a family. It seems that they are related to almost every clan in Negros! Wherever I go there, I inevitably meet someone who is somehow related to my wife’s family. When people find out I am married to Teemy Ledesma, I always get lines like, "Oh, Teemy? She is my cousin" or "Oh, Teemy? Her father is my mother’s third cousin" or "Oh, you’re Teemy’s husband? So you’re my sister-in-law’s in-law’s nephew-in-law!" Ever heard of the six degrees of separation theory? Well, in Bacolod, it’s two degrees of separation – tops! I used to spend countless hours with my father-in-law Nicolas Ledesma, talking about the history of the different Negros clans and their interconnections. I was totally fascinated because everyone I saw in the street was a potential relative.
The Ledesma relatives that particularly intrigued me were the Locsins, one of the pioneering clans of Silay. My father-in-law’s middle name was Locsin. During his wake last year, I had the chance to meet some of his Locsin cousins and relatives and I was overwhelmed at how they went out of their way to make me feel "right at home," even if I’m Kapampangan (I heard that historically, Kapampangans and Ilonggos tended to clash). One of the Locsins I had the privilege to meet was Nelia Locsin Puentevella-Jacinto, who, if I’m not mistaken, is a third cousin of my father-in-law. She introduced me to Lolita Locsin-Conching, who, at 81, is one of the matriarchs of the clan. Lola Lolita’s passion and zeal for the Locsin clan is quite extraordinary. In fact, I’d say it’s almost legendary. You’ve heard of the old adage "blood is thicker than water?" Well, she gives that saying a whole new meaning. She is so animated when it comes to her clan and its rich history. Through her, I learned that the Locsin genealogy starts in the year 1750, and that it is the only genealogy in Asia filed in the Genealogical Society of Utah, Yale and Syracuse Universities. How about that? They’ve been around for some time, haven’t they? During the first Locsin nationwide reunion back in 1974, more than 1,400 people attended – from as far north as Nueva Ecija to as far south as Davao and Zamboanga. Ramon Magsaysay awardee Raul Locsin, former second lady Celia Diaz-Laurel, actress Susan Roces, former Solicitor General Frank Chavez, staunch Marcos ally Roberto Benedicto and anti-Marcos activist and Free Press publisher Teodoro Locsin Sr. are all part of this illustrious clan.
"What’s so special about them?" you might be tempted to ask. After all, every clan in the country can somehow boast something that makes them unique. And most, if not all, would have the bragging rights of saying that they are somehow related to some popular or famous figure. Almost every full-blooded Pinoy takes pride in his/her family’s history, right? After all, that’s what we’re known for – our extended family ties.
Very true. But what strikes me about Lola Lolita and the Locsin clan is the way they have used the blood relationship within the clan as leverage not only to preserve the history of the clan (which is what most people do) but more importantly, to do positive works in society and serve the less fortunate. Lola Lolita, together with her relatives Marina Locsin Gamboa, Gloria Locsin Locsin, Carmen Locsin Kilayco and Connie Locsin Locsin continued the research on the family genealogy initiated by patriarch Carlos L. Locsin. In the process of doing so, they committed to establish a foundation – the Locsin Genealogy Foundation – that was to perpetuate the work of Carlos L. Locsin, and, at the same time, serve as a catalyst in helping ameliorate the living conditions of distressed citizens.
And for that, I tip my hat to the Locsin clan and to all other clans who still believe in the influence of families. Somehow, over the years, this type of family commitment to society has diminished over the years. A lot of families now only look after themselves. Instead of thinking what they can give to society, a lot of clans now tend to be clannish, particularly those families who have dabbled in business and have what I call the "what’s-in-it-for-the-family?" mentality. While, indeed, family must be the top priority for everyone, it doesn’t mean that family interests should be the only priority. Families, as the basic unit of society, must go beyond their house walls and think of their civic responsibilities.
Yes, charity begins at home. But charity certainly mustn’t end there. Families, especially financially successful ones, must always bear in mind that after the family needs have been met, the next step is not to further accumulate wealth for the benefit of the next generation. The next generation can take care of itself. Let them earn their keep. Let them appreciate the value of hard work. In a way, families must be like corporations – they should have a purpose for existing. And they should live that purpose. And it’s up to each family to determine what their purpose in society is. It’s not that easy. Sometimes, there could be family feuds. But it can be done. And it can be done precisely because there is a common denominator – you are all of the same blood.
My grandfather’s brother, Juan Nepomuceno, a very successful businessman and a civic leader, was once asked about his thoughts on a proposed business venture. You’d imagine that the first question he’d ask would be, "What’s the ROI?" or "What’s the capital required?" You know what his first question was? "How many jobs will be created with this new business?" How many businessmen still think this way? I really don’t know, but I bet there’s only a handful.
Bottom line is this – God has blessed all of us with families. And we should all be proud of our families. But let’s not end there. There’s a strong temptation to be self-indulgent and overly proud about one’s roots that we become almost narcissistic. In the Bible, people would tell the Lord, "We are children of Abraham." To which the Lord replied, "I could turn one of these stones into children of Abraham." It’s not where you belong that matters. It’s recognizing that we all belong to one big family that counts. And the more people in your family that you can convince on this, the closer you get to finding out the meaning of "family interest."
After all – if you think about it – our country is just one big family. Let’s do our part in making it a happy and loving family.
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