Highered selves

For the modern day nine-to-five Juan de la Cruz, no business is quite as good as your own. And though the pay check is far plumper in the cutthroat world of large-scale corporations and high-end business firms, there’s always a lingering sense of achievement in being your own boss. Belligerence is practically a virtue in the dog-eat-dog market, and self-employment seems to be the final bastion of honorable livelihood, or so E-Male would care to think. Besides, nothing is quite as fulfilling and utterly ridiculous as hiring yourself. Not that E-Male has problems taking orders.

As a matter of fact, E-Male considers himself quite the obedient employee – making sure that all office facilities are in good working condition; spending as much time as possible by the water cooler, the restroom, and all cubicles of lady co-workers who seem to have misplaced their staplers.

But in any case, E-Male has also considered himself as more of his own man than anything else, from a ripe old age of six already trying to get a foothold in being his own source of income. Not that there was anything wrong with selling his father’s shirts at generously discounted prices during recess – it still was a low-cost, high- return venture. The tongue lashing that quickly followed was a minor setback of course, but the path to greatness is always riddled with obstacles, quandaries and unforeseen overhead costs. Since then, E-Male has taken to heart that the idea of taking orders from a superior is asking far too much of his independent, free-spirited streak; with exceptions, of course, to certain romantic relationships.

Alas, the variety of businesses one may enter is as diverse and imaginative as a woman’s underwear drawer.

There’s one for every possible occasion, situation and style. There are pairs that suit the exciting, and there those for the more conservative – and when you strip down to it (slight pun intended), it’s all but a matter of taste and preference.

More often than not, high-wire entrepreneurs try their hand at ventures they’ve already had a knack for. Real world business pursuits need to be a bit more lucrative than E-Male’s own personal ukay-ukay or run-of-the-mill lemonade stands – and, lest we forget – his pioneership of Mc Isaw joints. And so the talents that have been stashed away along with these skeletons and ex-lovers may come far handier than even mother thought they would.

Then again, some talents are more bankable than others. There are fine reasons as to why meatless crispy pata and odorless deodorant went quickly out of fashion – as did singing telegrams and Michael Jackson. There is an unwritten rule about ensuring the practicality of your service before heading off to the land of self-employment. Advertising does its job yes, but scantily clad models and powwow catch phrases can only bring you so far (and then some).

In a statistical sense, the life expectancy of starting businesses is hardly worth bringing out a calendar for. If businesses left cadavers, cemeteries would be oligopolies.

From a local perspective, a single jeep ride along the metro is a good enough field trip to snatch glimpses of popular trends in independent ventures. Street vending is a classic example of Filipino resilience at its finest. As small as they may be, they are living proof of investors’ misperception of a stagnant Filipino industry. From a torpedo economy that thrives on the purchasing of fishballs, adidas, isaw and sago gulaman, to locally pirated VCDs, DVDs and audio CDs – the Filipino’s predilection to tiny, more manageable exploits is actually characteristic of a native low risk, solo-flight mentality. The tubero signs all along Metro Manila ares already enough to make the Philippines the non-unionized plumbing capital of the world.

Regrettably enough, job security is a serious issue when trying to set up your own fledgling business. But on the upside, nothing seems to come close to the feeling of being able to fire yourself from your own job (employees would simply term this as "quitting") which is seen from a totally different light from an employer’s point of view. Not only does it save you the drama of that awkward pre-departure lecture, but it also saves you the hassle of fishing from co-workers about clues of the boss doing an early axing job. In this case, you can do the axing at your own time and at your own space.

The paperwork and bureaucratic palaver does get a bit daunting at times, but a charitable three-hundred pesos on the side for the needy administrator can go a long way – be it for any permit, legality or issuance. Even the office space can be an easily found loophole. One could try keeping their current job and work right off their existing workspace. It’s two for the price of one. And if the cramped quarters get in the room of some financial headway; working straight out of your own home works just as well.

It still is a blow to the ego to have your own business run to the ground. But if it doesn’t, rest assured you’ll end up a brighter, happier, "highered" self.

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E-mail E-Male at argee@justice.com.