The Business of Tsismis

Tourism Secretary Dick Gordon declared on CNN that "The Philippines is the Beach Capital of Asia," hoping to erase the Western media tag of "Kidnap Capital of Asia." Other Asian countries with beautiful beaches may contest that, but for sure, nobody will deny that the Philippines is the "Tsismis Capital of Asia."

The whole nation is inundated with tsismis of all kinds – from business gossip that drives stock market fluctuations to idle banter in coffee shops, golf courses and salons where beauty parlor tales thrive. People talk about the excesses in show business and politics, whether it’s on radio, TV or whether they are merely exchanging kuwentong kutsero in the back alleys of urban slums. The modern-day text messages and e-mails have elevated the perverse art of tsismis to stratospheric levels of sophistication and efficacy (we send more daily text messages than all of Europe combined, according to a top telecommunications executive).

If only the rumor mills contributed to the Philippine gross national product (GNP) like the steel mills of Taiwan and Korea or the textile mills of China, then our country would be an economic power. If tsismisan were an Olympic sport, then our jueteng republic would have long walloped our neighbors and won gold medals, because rumor mongering is our true national sport, not basketball.

It’s still argued that ex-President Joseph Estrada lost his grip on government not due to People Power or a military coup, but due to "Tsismis Power."

Tsismis As Destructive Business Weapon

Business tsismis is more riveting than the Kris-Joey or Jules-Assunta scandals and definitely more significant in their impact on the life of the nation.

It is usually negative, pejorative, scandalous, controversial and destructive. Woody Allen, the brilliant filmmaker and himself the subject of salacious tsismis, said, "Gossip is the new pornography."

Negative tsismis is often deployed as a business weapon. False tsismis can acquire a life of its own, becoming self-fulfilling and running amok in destructive fury. It can become economic sabotage with consequences like bank runs.

A retail giant was once the victim of a ridiculous gossip meant to scare away female shoppers from dressing rooms, and sources said this rumor originated from another rival retail chain from southern Philippines. A major hamburger chain was once the victim of a destructive tsismis falsely accusing it of using earthworms instead of beef, and I heard one of the owners explaining that this was impossible, because worms were more expensive than beef and that these worms were then being exported by the Philippines to Japan. A famous powdered milk was once rumored to have "radioactive" products coming from Europe near the site of a nuclear accident. One of the earliest business tsismis goes that a top noodle restaurant was allegedly using cat meat in its bestselling siopao, with even Fernando Amorsolo drawing a caricature about this rumor.

Megaworld founder Andrew Tan recounted that before the 1997 Asian financial crisis, his firm suffered from the most vicious of rumors. During a meeting with the Puyat family to negotiate a joint venture, Puyat received a telephone call claiming that Tan had already fled the country due to financial problems but Tan was in a meeting for a new project at that precise moment. Ironically, the destructive tsismis forced Megaworld to strengthen itself financially prior to the 1997 Asian crisis, thus making it one of the few strong real estate conglomerates today.

A giant multinational firm was once a victim of a bizarre worldwide tsismis that its logo was a Satanic symbol and that part of its revenues were donated to Satanic cults. The late Jewish billionaire banker Edmond Safra was once the victim of a well-orchestrated tsismis campaign spread across Europe, South America and North America accusing him of laundering illegal drug money, but his decisive court victories later forced a major American bank to punish its top executives who were behind this smear campaign.

Tsismis as weapon of political warfare is as deadly, because it is easier to issue denials in mass media than to counter black propaganda spread via tsismis. Whether for business or political goals, the most ingenious practitioners of negative rumor mongering use the subtle tactic of weaving tales with half-truths. Even the most discerning people fall prey to elaborate yarns meshed with layers and icings of half-truths.

Tsismis Inc.

Guess who are now the top three "jueteng lords" of Luzon and how much cash they are raking in? What are the newest twists and turns in the NAIA3 airport project? What about the coastal highway construction scam? Will there be a surprise announcement soon about the clash of the titans between John Gokongwei Jr. and Manny Pangilinan and Tony Boy Cojuangco for control of PLDT and Fort Bonifacio? What are the new strategies of the Zobel-Ayala clan in their Makati real estate and telecom domains to ward off upstarts? What is the next big business family feud that will soon explode out of control? What’s the latest news on the Marcos billions? Who is this big entrepreneur raring to take revenge against which multinational bank? What will be the new name and direction of WG&A after the Aboitiz clan buys out the Chiongbian and Gothong families? What’s the next battle for the wealthiest barangay chief Jose Concepcion Jr. of Forbes Park?

What is Henry Sy doing as a new investor in San Miguel Corp. and how will Danding Cojuangco adjust to this? What surprise business maneuver will come next from Lucio Tan? How will the still influential Lopez clan pay their numerous loans and is Power Plant Mall really still for sale? Is it true that Ambassador Alfonso Yuchengco is bored at the UN and what will be his next business move if he indeed returns to Manila by year’s end? Who is this married cabinet secretary who is now allegedly playing with fire by secretly courting an entertainer? Who is this legislator who recently purchased a big mansion in the US?

Rumor-mongering can also be big business especially for print and broadcast media. While some publications like the STAR refrain from publishing unsubstantiated tsismis on the front page, sensational journalism is thriving in the country. Referring to this practice, Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist of The San Francisco Chronicle Herb Caen said, "Gossip? It’s mother’s milk of journalism." Edward Eggleston, 19th century US historian and novelist, also commented: "Journalism is organized gossip."

Forbes business magazine recently listed some quotes on gossip, reflecting perhaps its potent effect on Wall Street and on the traditionally sober field of commerce. Magazine founder Malcolm Forbes was quoted to have uttered: "People most worth talking about often are not." Comedian Milton Berle said: "My wife says she doesn’t like to repeat gossip, but she says: What else is there to do with it?"

Tsismis Unlimited

Neither high education nor religion exempts people from gossip. A prime example is the well-read Kris Aquino who relishes her job as an unabashed purveyor of tsismis on The Buzz. She herself seems to bask in her being the subject of the most rabid rumors. A top politician once told us that even eminent leaders of the Catholic Church are not immune from this delightful sin. A journalist said even the President and the opposition often hanker for political and other tsismis. A senator half-seriously told us: "If I propose a law making rumor-mongering a crime, majority of our people from all walks of life will pack our jails. Even I would be a habitual offender."

Dr. Jose Rizal once demonstrated how truth could be distorted out of proportion by using this age-old psychology-of-rumor exercise: He lined up some children and whispered a sentence to the first kid and let each child pass on the information, which eventually ended up distorted upon reaching the last kid.

Tsismis As Opium Of The Oppressed, As Weapon Of Rebellion

Writer Erica Jong said: "Gossip is the opiate of the oppressed." Indeed, one rationale behind the tsismis phenomenon in our jueteng republic is that it is due to the pent-up frustrations and disenchantment of the people on generations of traditional political leaders who failed to deliver on their promises. What better way to hit back at disliked leaders than to make them the butt of jokes, ridicule and tsismis?

Tsismis cuts down to size the oversized egos of the powerful as well as releases frustrations against the high and mighty. Gossiping is one real expression of people’s democracy in action. In our semi-feudal and oligarchic society which is still trying to become an American-style democracy, irreverent tsismis on the peccadillos, excesses, inanities and immorality of many icons of power is the people’s way of letting off steam and making sense of our national foibles. Filipinos have an uncanny talent of laughing at ourselves through tsismis. It has become a psychological and spiritual survival mechanism to cushion against the harsh realities of mass poverty, social injustice, criminality and pervasive corruption.

Since idleness due to lack of jobs can be a fertile breeding ground for more tsismis, our leaders should minimize political theatrics and create more employment by encouraging investments.

Tsismis is just another of our people’s innate and under-utilized creative energies and talents. It should remind our leaders that people are endlessly restless about our under-performing economy and oppressed with mischievous discontentment.

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Please send comments, suggestions, jokes or any tsismis to wilson_lee_flores@hotmail.com and wilson_lee_flores@yahoo.com or P.O. Box 14277, Ortigas Center, Pasig City.