Be confident!

(Part II)

Here are more excerpts from Susan Jeffers’ The Little Book of Confidence.

Reclaim your power.

• Let go of the victim mentality.

The victim mentality is a product of our lower self. When you play the role of victim, you give away your power. When you take responsibility for your life, your power is restored.

• Don’t blame yourself.

The path to greater confidence and self-fulfillment is a lengthy process of trial and error. There is no need to blame yourself for your past, present or future behavior. It is all part of the learning process.

• Are you a complainer?

Complaining is a very common activity of everyone’s lower self. It is also a big clue that you are not taking responsibility for your experience of life.

• Take action.

Complaining will not change things in your life. Only action will. Make a list of all you need to do to change what doesn’t work in your life and, little by little, begin making those changes.

• Sculpt your life.

Few sculpt their lives. Most accept what comes their way and then gripe about it. You have the power to create what you need. Commitment, action and positive thoughts will take you a long way.

Speak confidently.

• Watch your words.

The words you use impact on how you feel about yourself. Certain words are destructive. Others are empowering.

• Choosing is powerful. The words "I can’t" imply that you are helpless, whereas, "I choose not to" implies confidence and strength.

• See the gifts. Instead of seeing life’s obstacles as problems, see them as opportunities, opening the door to growth. Each time you have the opportunity to stretch your capacity to handle the world around you, the more powerful and confident you will feel.

• The key to security. People who have been forced to face their worst fears and more re-emerge, much stronger. Remember, security lies not in having things, but handling things.

Expand Your Limits

• The comfort zone. Most of us operate within a zone that is comfortable, outside of which we are uncomfortable. For example, you may happily initiate friendship with colleagues, but won’t approach "the higher ups." Notice what situations in life make you uncomfortable.

• Start taking little risks. Each day take a little risk to expand your comfort zone. Phone someone you feel intimidated about calling. Walk proudly into a restaurant where you are uncomfortable dining alone. Not to worry, you’ll handle whatever happens.

• Watch your confidence grow. Each time you move out of your comfort zone, your confidence builds. Your world becomes larger and larger. Expanding your comfort zone becomes easier and easier with each risk, despite any fear you may be experiencing.

You Are Not Alone

• Everyone feels fear. Not only do you experience fear whenever you are in unfamiliar territory, so does everyone else. By virtue of the fact we are all human beings, we share similar feelings. Fear is no exception.

• It only looks like others have no fear. You may think others such as celebrities are lucky because they are not afraid to put themselves out there. Not so! They had to push through a tremendous amount of fear to get where they are today and they are still pushing.

• The fear never goes away. As long as you keep stretching your capabilities and expanding your horizon, you are going to experience fear. It’s the human condition. But as your confidence builds, it will become easier to feel the fear and do it anyway!

Open Your Eyes To Abundance

• The art of gratitude.

The art of gratitude is being able to make ordinary things in your life extraordinary. Write or think of 50 extraordinary ordinary things for which you are truly grateful. And do this every night before you go to sleep. Life is not only huge. It is rich.

• Remember the bright side.

Train yourself to stop complaining and look for the blessings and beauty that surround you every moment of every day, despite what is happening in any particular situation in your life.

Give it away!

• Do you give or do you simply exchange?

Most of us operate on a hidden barter system. Few genuinely ever give away any thing without expecting something in return – money, appreciation, love or whatever.

• When giving is about getting, fear is created.

If getting is your motivation for giving, you worry about not getting anything back. Then you worry about not getting back enough. Your fear of being short changed or taken advantage of destroys your peace of mind.

• Genuine giving. When you give with an open heart, with nothing expected in return, peace reigns. Genuine giving creates joy within our being. It is a great boost to our confidence.

• Give of yourself. When you help others, you become powerful. And when others use what they have learned from you, your effect in the world is greatly magnified.

• Your higher purpose is to be a giver.

In whatever you do in life, rise above the petty details and find the many ways to give to the world around you. In so doing, you will receive so much. Most of all, the confidence in your life really makes a difference.

Confidence. Remember that it lies within you. You just need to unleash it.

I hope that some of what you have read today will open your mind and your heart to what is in you and the knowledge of it will help you go through what life has in store for you, for all of us.

(E-mail me at babyjackster@hotmail.com)