‘Age doesn’t matter, as long as...’
June 15, 2003 | 12:00am
Pops Fernandez is one of those rare showbiz birds who continues to make waves two decades after she first burst into the entertainment scene. The country’s undisputed Concert Queen, she is also a movie actress, a TV and events host, an entrepreneur with her Pipay line of funky T-shirts, and an in-demand endorser of a wide range of products.
Now, Pops breaks new ground as the first image model of a Philippine mall, Ortigas’ swank Shangri-La Mall. Its marketing manager Sandra Garcia says the mall’s management chose Pops because she projects the mall’s vibrancy, class and versatility. And as expected, Pops has taken on the role with the professionalism and high style that have marked her successful showbiz career.
Though Allure’s pictorial with Pops is set for 3 p.m. on a Sunday, she is there a full hour ahead of schedule. "To have dinner with my sons," she explains, adding that with her perennially busy schedule, it is one promise she wants to keep. Pops then gamely poses in different venues in the mall, attracting oglers wherever she goes.
But after going through five outfit changes with their corresponding hair and makeup requirements, Pops is unable to make it to dinner with her sons. But – and this is the most revealing of all – one does not hear a single complaint from Pops. Instead, she joins the group for dinner, smiling sweetly and showing nary a diva-esque tantrum over losing precious time with her sons.
That kind of response speaks volumes about Pops who is not one to sulk over missed opportunities or to go into a fit if things don’t turn out the way she expects them to. From her failed marriage to Martin Nievera, of which she says there is no more bitterness ("Forgiveness is knowing that deep inside, you have no anger regardless of whatever happened," she says), to the constant speculation over her love life, Pops has learned to take things in stride – with peace in her heart.
Yes, she admits, she is dating 22-year-old upcoming actor and commercial model Brad Turvey, but what others have to say about it doesn’t ruffle her one bit. Asked why people seem to make a fuss about a woman dating a younger man, Pops replies, "Maybe it’s interesting for them. I think age doesn’t matter as long as you’re dealing with character and the right personality. My choice will always be questioned anyway; if I go out with an older man, it will be also be questioned. I guess it will always be interesting to know – not just about me but other celebrities. Other people are just curious to know."
"You have to get to know a person," Pops continues, "and the only way to do so is if you converse. We do have the tendency to judge other people by the way they dress or the way they carry themselves. But what really matters is how a person is inside."
Discover more of how Pops Fernandez is inside in her very own words.
"My son Robin is 16 while Ram is 13. No, they don’t ask me who I’m dating. Honestly! They don’t read the newspaper; as a matter of fact I’m the one who feeds them the information. I’d rather they hear it from me than from other people who would explain it to them differently than I would. Maybe other people’s explanations would be based on their opinion and not on my opinion. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being honest with your kids.
"It’s good my sons have their own sets of friends. Robin has his own life. Ram is still enjoying his childhood. They’re both definitely into cartoons pa and I still catch them playing with their toy figures. But I know they’re maturing. Every week Robin goes to church then after church he goes with his cousins and his church-friends.
"Do they ask questions about girls and sex? Sometimes I’m the one who offers the information. (I say) ‘Hey, just in case you guys are curious...’ (And they go) ‘Mom, we know... yeah, yeah!’ (And I tell them) ‘Okay, so long as you’re not confused or afraid.’ Because they might think sex is bad or it’s not something to talk about.
"Maybe the only difficult part in this situation is that I am a working mom and time is very important.
"I still hug and kiss them – they have no choice! We’re pretty cool. But I also know that they’re growing up so when we’re outside, they’re young men and I respect that."
"I don’t give my sons false hopes (that their dad and I will reconcile). The only thing I say when it comes to that is, ‘You know, it’s nice to hope because when I was a little girl I was also wishing for the same thing (Pops’ parents, Dulce Lukban and the late Eddie Fernandez, separated–Ed.) and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. I tell them that in case it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t mean God isn’t listening to your prayers. It only means that people have their own choices, or maybe there’s something else in store for mom and dad.
"I believe in destiny and that God works in His own mysterious ways. For the kids it’s safe enough to say that whatever He wants is best. I don’t stop them from hoping – that would be cruel. Even as we grow up we have our own wishes and hopes."
"Not a lot of people would be as honest as I am in admitting that, yes we date, or yes, we do go out. A lot of celebrities would rather not talk about it or probably do so discreetly. I also don’t blame them. If guys want to make friends with me, there’s nothing wrong with that. As far as Brad’s status is concerned, it’s not my fault that I worked hard and spent a lot of time in the business. And I don’t think that it’s anybody’s fault that they’re actually just starting (their careers). Correct me if I’m wrong but that’s my basis in life. I think people try to judge us without knowing our heart and our personality."
"Shopping is very important. We always say that times are hard. But we still see families in the malls and for them it’s a time to bond. Before when you say, ‘I’ll go shopping,’ it was in a department store, it was just to buy things. Now, malling means you go to the movies together; now malls have spas, restaurants – it’s for everybody.
"When we’re going through a problem, it makes us feel good to find something and say, ‘My, I saw a good bargain in this store!’ Parang there’s more to life than my problem! When you go to the mall, you go to the salon and have a hot oil. Not only do you nurture your hair and put it back to life, you feel good. The massage that goes with it relaxes you.
"I was honored when they asked me to be the image model of Shangri-La Mall. (The management) has made a lot of changes and is still doing a lot of changes here. There are so many choices in this mall; it’s complete with a range of stores to choose from whatever your taste – trendy, hip, conservative. A lot of people come here because even if it’s big, it’s very comfortable, not intimidating at all. Sometimes ‘spacious’ can be tiring; this is just right. The different sections are easy to find, whatever your needs."
"I try to be more active. I’m into boxing two or three times a week for an hour each with a trainer. I also attended taebo classes. When I can’t, I watch the tape and do (the routine) by myself in my bedroom. I’m also starting badminton.
"I tried almost every diet but I realized that every time I tell myself I’m on a diet, I get more hungry and I eat more. I don’t really stop myself from eating. I just don’t eat certain types of food like pork.
"Eating out with my kids is therapeutic. In life, we all need to eat and we love to eat. We don’t get to spend that much time together so these things count a lot."
"My t-shirt line Pipay is doing very well. By the end of this year we will open a Pipay store in Shangri-La Mall.
"Yes, I do design the shirts. We’re a small team. The reason I gave birth to Pipay is because even before when I wasn’t as busy, I was already designing. Yes, I do spend a lot of time and I do have a lot of say with the Pipay line. I figured that if it’s not gonna be a hands-on thing with me, ’wag na lang. I hope to come out with my own beauty products line. It will start with a lipstick."
"I promised myself that for as long as I’m having fun and enjoying myself, I will be here. There’s always room for growth. Just because I’ve been here a certain number of years doesn’t mean that’s it. I would want to – I’ve already started – production. I’ve also directed my concerts.
"I’ve been in this business for a long time. More than ever, I am working harder because I want a good future for my kids. I’m proud to say that my mom raised me pretty well considering the odds and the difficulties. I guess what happened during those times (is something) not too many people go through.
"Like any woman, I’d want to be with somebody who would love me for who I am. I also get hurt, upset. I’m also very simple. I really am a quiet, private person.
"We should have fun and goals and we should try to live our dreams. But we should not stress or pressure ourselves. I think the most important thing is living life to the fullest.
"How? Make a list of things you might still want to do. Even if it’s just to ride a roller coaster, write it down. Or try a new dish or something. These are small things we miss out on. I do have that list because I am also guilty of sometimes being so stressed with my work.
"Also, enjoy each day, whatever you’re doing. Especially in our culture, since we were kids we’ve been taught to know what’s right and what’s wrong. If you know what’s right and if you’re not hurting anybody, then do it!"
E-mail the author at: annmondo@yahoo.com
Now, Pops breaks new ground as the first image model of a Philippine mall, Ortigas’ swank Shangri-La Mall. Its marketing manager Sandra Garcia says the mall’s management chose Pops because she projects the mall’s vibrancy, class and versatility. And as expected, Pops has taken on the role with the professionalism and high style that have marked her successful showbiz career.
Though Allure’s pictorial with Pops is set for 3 p.m. on a Sunday, she is there a full hour ahead of schedule. "To have dinner with my sons," she explains, adding that with her perennially busy schedule, it is one promise she wants to keep. Pops then gamely poses in different venues in the mall, attracting oglers wherever she goes.
But after going through five outfit changes with their corresponding hair and makeup requirements, Pops is unable to make it to dinner with her sons. But – and this is the most revealing of all – one does not hear a single complaint from Pops. Instead, she joins the group for dinner, smiling sweetly and showing nary a diva-esque tantrum over losing precious time with her sons.
That kind of response speaks volumes about Pops who is not one to sulk over missed opportunities or to go into a fit if things don’t turn out the way she expects them to. From her failed marriage to Martin Nievera, of which she says there is no more bitterness ("Forgiveness is knowing that deep inside, you have no anger regardless of whatever happened," she says), to the constant speculation over her love life, Pops has learned to take things in stride – with peace in her heart.
Yes, she admits, she is dating 22-year-old upcoming actor and commercial model Brad Turvey, but what others have to say about it doesn’t ruffle her one bit. Asked why people seem to make a fuss about a woman dating a younger man, Pops replies, "Maybe it’s interesting for them. I think age doesn’t matter as long as you’re dealing with character and the right personality. My choice will always be questioned anyway; if I go out with an older man, it will be also be questioned. I guess it will always be interesting to know – not just about me but other celebrities. Other people are just curious to know."
"You have to get to know a person," Pops continues, "and the only way to do so is if you converse. We do have the tendency to judge other people by the way they dress or the way they carry themselves. But what really matters is how a person is inside."
Discover more of how Pops Fernandez is inside in her very own words.
"It’s good my sons have their own sets of friends. Robin has his own life. Ram is still enjoying his childhood. They’re both definitely into cartoons pa and I still catch them playing with their toy figures. But I know they’re maturing. Every week Robin goes to church then after church he goes with his cousins and his church-friends.
"Do they ask questions about girls and sex? Sometimes I’m the one who offers the information. (I say) ‘Hey, just in case you guys are curious...’ (And they go) ‘Mom, we know... yeah, yeah!’ (And I tell them) ‘Okay, so long as you’re not confused or afraid.’ Because they might think sex is bad or it’s not something to talk about.
"Maybe the only difficult part in this situation is that I am a working mom and time is very important.
"I still hug and kiss them – they have no choice! We’re pretty cool. But I also know that they’re growing up so when we’re outside, they’re young men and I respect that."
"I believe in destiny and that God works in His own mysterious ways. For the kids it’s safe enough to say that whatever He wants is best. I don’t stop them from hoping – that would be cruel. Even as we grow up we have our own wishes and hopes."
"When we’re going through a problem, it makes us feel good to find something and say, ‘My, I saw a good bargain in this store!’ Parang there’s more to life than my problem! When you go to the mall, you go to the salon and have a hot oil. Not only do you nurture your hair and put it back to life, you feel good. The massage that goes with it relaxes you.
"I was honored when they asked me to be the image model of Shangri-La Mall. (The management) has made a lot of changes and is still doing a lot of changes here. There are so many choices in this mall; it’s complete with a range of stores to choose from whatever your taste – trendy, hip, conservative. A lot of people come here because even if it’s big, it’s very comfortable, not intimidating at all. Sometimes ‘spacious’ can be tiring; this is just right. The different sections are easy to find, whatever your needs."
"I tried almost every diet but I realized that every time I tell myself I’m on a diet, I get more hungry and I eat more. I don’t really stop myself from eating. I just don’t eat certain types of food like pork.
"Eating out with my kids is therapeutic. In life, we all need to eat and we love to eat. We don’t get to spend that much time together so these things count a lot."
"Yes, I do design the shirts. We’re a small team. The reason I gave birth to Pipay is because even before when I wasn’t as busy, I was already designing. Yes, I do spend a lot of time and I do have a lot of say with the Pipay line. I figured that if it’s not gonna be a hands-on thing with me, ’wag na lang. I hope to come out with my own beauty products line. It will start with a lipstick."
"I’ve been in this business for a long time. More than ever, I am working harder because I want a good future for my kids. I’m proud to say that my mom raised me pretty well considering the odds and the difficulties. I guess what happened during those times (is something) not too many people go through.
"Like any woman, I’d want to be with somebody who would love me for who I am. I also get hurt, upset. I’m also very simple. I really am a quiet, private person.
"We should have fun and goals and we should try to live our dreams. But we should not stress or pressure ourselves. I think the most important thing is living life to the fullest.
"How? Make a list of things you might still want to do. Even if it’s just to ride a roller coaster, write it down. Or try a new dish or something. These are small things we miss out on. I do have that list because I am also guilty of sometimes being so stressed with my work.
"Also, enjoy each day, whatever you’re doing. Especially in our culture, since we were kids we’ve been taught to know what’s right and what’s wrong. If you know what’s right and if you’re not hurting anybody, then do it!"
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