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‘How love turned my life around’ | Philstar.com
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‘How love turned my life around’

HEART TO HEART - HEART TO HEART By Ann Montemar-Oriondo -
Gretchen Barretto obliges a peek into her heart and reveals how her love for businessman Tonyboy Cojuangco–and Tonyboy’s love for her–has turned her life around.

"I live for love.

Among the people I know, the one who personifies love is Tonyboy. Why? Because... basta! Yun na yun!

I have no doubt I am in love pag sinabi kong ‘basta,’ yun na yun. Nagloloka-lokahan na ko. ’Pag di na ko makatulog, yun na yun. I know I am out of love pag sinabi kong ‘Ayoko na!’ Di na ko bumabalik.

The greatest thing I’ve done for love is give up my career. Masakit yun! (laughs) Minsan gusto kong tumigil... pero minsan lang.

The stupidest advice someone gave me about love was ‘Balikan mo na lang ang career mo, iwan mo na yan! Pelikula ka ulit!’ Pero hindi ako masunurin!

The best thing about loving is being loved back in return. The most fulfilling thing about loving is when that person loves you back the same way twice and when you’re appreciated for any little or big thing you’ve done. I think that’s what keeps a relationship going. Sometimes for you, you’re not making an effort, you know it’s an obligation as a wife or as a mother and you do (what has to be done) and then you always hear a ‘thank you’ when you know the person doesn’t have to thank you for it. These inspire me to be a better person.

The sweetest way someone (Tonyboy) has expressed his love for me was when he gave everything up for me, turned his back on the world just for me.

He is an introvert, I am an extrovert. Why do we click? He needs me to be happy; if I’m quiet, too... you know what I mean?

Which among my qualities does Tonyboy appreciate most? I may be matapang as a defense but I really am kind, very caring.

What are the secrets for keeping our love and relationship alive? It’s hard to give advice when it comes to love because each person has a different attitude and experience. I cannot play for effect and say, ‘This is how it should be,’ di ba? (People might say) ‘Nagpapagaling, nagpapa-perfect ako. My relationship is different from 10 million other people. Iba-iba. You know what I mean. But advice can be taken or not, di ba? So...

The three basic ingredients of love are trust, patience and understanding.

Love because you love. Some people stay for the wrong reasons when it comes to love; some stay in a relationship just because they have invested a lot of time and pain. Or they say, ‘Ah I have to keep this relationship because of the children,’ or ‘I’d like to keep this relationship because of financial reasons,’ or ‘If I leave it now wala akong trabaho.’ Love because you love. Love because of the right reasons. That’s how I think.

You also have to be exciting! I have a lot of male friends and when I ask them, ‘What’s your problem, why are things not okay?’ they always say, ‘We just lost the magic. It has become boring.’

You’ve got to be exciting in everything, not just one specific thing. You’ve got to have life, have that ‘it.’ For example, people who have been together for a long time take their bodies, their looks, or way of dressing for granted. And not just their appearance–everything they take for granted. That’s when it becomes boring. You don’t want to have a boring partner.

You must also fight for your love. The best advice someone gave me about love is ‘Fight for it!’ Pag may humahadlang sa relationship, harangin mo na sila (laughs)! How? It depends on the situation. In my case, the more na may hahadlang, the more I fight for the relationship, the more I stick with it. It’s like reminding me that hey, this person is precious. I didn’t say (you should) fight others; fight for your love. I’m not a weakling; hindi ako nagpapa-pressure sa mga kumokontra. I don’t ignore (criticisms), but I hold on to my relationship. I don’t let go. That’s how I am.

If you want to be loyal, don’t go out (laughs)! Stay away from temptation! Close your eyes! If you respect him, you’ll stay loyal.

If I were to lose a loved one–if it’s death and not just breaking up–it’s something I don’t want to think about. If I really love someone, I don’t know how I will cope.

I haven’t come to a point where I can experience what could be most frustrating about love. Right now, the eight years Tony and I have spent together have all been beautiful."

AH I

GRETCHEN BARRETTO

IF I

KNOW

LOVE

PAG

RELATIONSHIP

TONY AND I

TONYBOY

TONYBOY COJUANGCO

YUN

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