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Opinion

The height of male chauvinism

ESSENCE - Ligaya Rabago-Visaya - The Freeman

Senator Tito Sotto III, in his way of providing a "lighter" topic in a forum that requires propriety, discussed the personal life of Department of Social Welfare and Development Secretary Judy Taguiwalo during the Commission on Appointments hearing. Such move ended up commenting about her being a single mother and likened the situation to the street language of getting knocked up.

Being a single parent is not a joke. It should never be made as a joke. It is obviously not an issue for one to achieve in life or be a basis for one to aspire and succeed in life.

There is the right time and place for everything. And definitely a forum of supposed-to-be dignified men and women is not the right place to joke about being a single parent.

Let us think of the many sacrifices to raise children single handedly. And it may be a choice for some to be all alone in rearing the children but of course there are situations that led them to choose such difficult situation. Under the ideal situation we want to have partners who can lessen the load of raising children to become responsible persons in the future.

We need to have sensitive persons who truly understand the circumstances behind single parenthood. And legislators who, instead of making fun of the situation, would create more laws that would pave the way for increased support and better conditions for single parents.

I am certain that no individual would like to raise a child on his or her own. But the circumstances leading to it would render one to accept it. The breakup of parents, the death of either the mother or the father are circumstances that render one to provide love, guidance, and support to the children all alone.   

I know for one who for many years has raised her children all alone. The husband, after a few years in the US was discovered to have another family. And for this, immediate family members could not just be blinded by financial difficulties the family in the Philippines has been going through. And so I have been supporting them in my own little way. And the rest family members are doing the same.

With still a predominantly prevailing regard that fathers are expected or should provide the needs of the family, the single mothers are left with the hard option to fill in the gap and so lessening their nurturing time for their children. And it is no joke for single mothers to assume both the dual roles as providers and nurturers.  

Joking about single mothers is the height of male chauvinism. Due to either personal choice or uncontrollable circumstances, many children are raised by single mothers who struggled to put food on the table every day and educate their children while working hard. Some may have been widows but they did not give their privileges or distinctions that spared their toil of raising their children.

To the women who may take this derision with a grain of salt, they need to get out of the shadow of the male species and understand that this world is made better when we think for ourselves and stand together as women.

And before anyone can taint others, it becomes imperative to look into the mirror first for self-reflection. The forum where such comment was given is not the right venue, and should never be regarded as a joke just for the amusement of others and yet to the disadvantage of the marginalized.

[email protected].

ESSENCE

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