Altruism vs Narcissism

We have to be aware of this danger. With how things are now, it is quite easy and tempting for something that is good to be spoiled because of a rotten intention one has in carrying it out. Yes, one can give alms, do a lot of social work and many works of mercy, but the motive is not true love for God and for others, but self-love.

This is when altruism is used as a mask for narcissism. How many times do we notice that some prominent people—usually politicians and even clerics, bishops not excluded—showing off their good work! It’s truly a pity.

They simply go against what Christ said. “Be careful not to perform your righteous acts before men to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.” (Mt 6,1)

They simply go against the example of Christ—the way, the truth and the life for us—who performed a lot of miracles, but who always told the beneficiaries not to announce these miracles openly.

Christ knew how to pass unnoticed even while carrying out the most important mission for mankind. When he was asked to go to Jerusalem to show his good works there, he refused. (cfr. Jn 7,1-10) But when disciples went there for the Jewish Festival of the Tabernacles, he also went, but not publicly. He did it in secret.

We have to be wary of our tendency and the strong temptation to bask in the limelight, flaunting whatever we have or have done. Such tendency and temptation is our way of glorifying ourselves because we would then be acting on our own authority and not on the authority of God.

Regarding this point, Christ said, “He who speaks on his own authority seeks his own glory. But he who seeks the glory of the One who sent him is a man of truth. In him, there is no falsehood.” (Jn 7,18)

To be able to distinguish between authentic altruism and a fake one that can only masks one’s narcissism, we need to defer always to the authority of God. Our thoughts, words and deeds, our intentions, desires and plans should only be inspired by God’s will and ways, by his tremendous love for us that knows how to pass unnoticed.

It’s amazing that nowadays we see a lot of prominent people, including high clerics, falling into the false charms of narcissism by deftly using the mask of altruism. They do a lot of selfies, they flaunt their accomplishments, they show unashamedly the foreign places they gone to, the restaurants and the food they have eaten, the number of fans they have, etc.

They talk a lot about themselves. Actually the spotlight is more on them than on their good deeds. The latter are mere props, simply used to feed their own egos. We have to be careful with this kind of leaders. Christ already warned us amply about false prophets, wolves in sheep’s clothing, etc. We have to be discerning to avoid being taken for a ride.

While it’s true that some kind of publicity is needed in one’s work, extreme care should be made so that we do not hijack for ourselves the glory that only belongs to God. In everything that we do, only Christ should be known, loved and served. We should try to avoid the incidental glory that can fall on us due to our work. And if it cannot be avoided, we should immediately refer it to God.

In this regard, constant rectification and purification of our intentions is needed. We should be able to echo what St. John the Baptist once said: “He must increase, but I must decrease.” (Jn 3,30)