Finding non-physical ways to deal with anger

It’s always this time of the year when the roads get full and people are always in a rush to get here and there that incidents of road rage become a regular thing on Metro Manila streets. We’ve seen it so many times. Drivers get into screaming matches, altercations ensue, and sometimes these fights escalate into the showing of guns or other weapons, and even into fights.

There have already been so many instances of this happening in Manila and we’re no strangers to fights on the road. However, when these road rage incidents become physical that’s when it goes from being a casual road rage encounter to something more. Like in the case of Joseph Russel Ingco who media has tagged “the driver of the blue Maserati,” the driver that got into an altercation with MMDA officer Jorbe Adriatico when the latter was caught on film assaulting Adriatico and dragging him by his shirt alongside his moving vehicle.

*      *      *

We’ve all seen the story – in one way or another – as it has been all over the media as well as the social media outlets. Adriatico made his statements immediately and his story was splashed all over online portals, causing a social outcry among netizens condemning the driver of the splashy sports car, and demanding justice. As is the case with most items that make the rounds on social media it was only a matter of time before Ingco was found and made to come forward.

Now, I know that trial by publicity is not a fair process and there are always two sides to every story, so as much as possible I try to remain impartial and fair when it comes to sensational stories like this.

However, with all my experience in the news business, I also know that when something like this happens it is important to make a statement right away or risk looking like the guilty party. After the incident the officer in question made his statement and filed his charges immediately whereas the owner of the infamous blue Maserati went into “hiding” making it look like he had something to hide.

Naturally with all the public attention and the fact that it is not that easy to hide a car as easily recognizable as a bright blue Maserati, the driver was found and Ingco had to make a public statement, due to the fact that he and his family were receiving very “bad publicity” and “death threats,” thanks to the incident.

His story on the other hand claims that the traffic enforcer was extremely rude to him and threatened him and that he only acted in self-defense because he was fearful for his safety. While that may be true to a certain extent, the fact that he only made this statement after he was forced into the open makes it look like a rehearsed defensive tactic rather than an honest emotional statement that came right after the incident.

Some say that Ingco has already received the raw end of the deal. The fact that he is considered yet another “rude rich” assailant already makes him look like a villain. Some even question if this story would have received as much attention had he not been driving a “blue Maserati.” And of course, many say that no matter what happens Ingco has already been labeled “guilty” in the court of public opinion. Can he really expect a fair shot now that all of this is stacked against him?

Personally, I feel that while he does deserve a blank slate when it comes to court proceedings (as Internet sentiment should have no weight in court), the fact remains that he committed physical assault on another human being and a person in a position of authority. Not only that, but he instigated it. I know that there are several persons in authority in Manila that are blatant power trippers and use their position to blackmail, threaten, and extort others. However, we always have to be cognizant of our responses to these people. Defend ourselves if necessary but never be the one to instigate the physical violence or it will always come back to you.

I don’t support the actions of either man. After all, I don’t think that Ingco would go straight to punching Adriatico without some sort of reason. The incident, it is said, was sparked when Ingco saw Adriatico taking photos and videos of him and his luxury vehicle as he was making an illegal left turn. The two men spoke through the window of the car and then eventually Ingco punched Adriatico and dragged him by his clothes alongside his moving vehicle.

According to Ingco and to some reports that have surfaced online, Adriatico is a bully as an officer and is known to threaten people. Ingco, in fact claims that he feared for his safety, which is why he reacted the way he did. However, even if this is true it does not give Ingco an excuse to escalate the fight to physical violence. I understand as well as anyone how angry you can get when in a fight with someone else, but if you resort to actually hitting someone you have taken the fight to a whole new level and this could have serious legal implications that you will have to face, especially if you instigate the violence. If, you are being hit however, that’s another story completely and you should defend yourself.

We can’t deny that there are those out there who may annoy us or bully us or even threaten us, but that doesn’t give us the right to assault them. At the end of the day, assault is assault. After all, if every citizen would be allowed to punch every person they disagreed with, we would live in utter chaos. It is important to remember that if someone does something to you – especially a person in authority – report these persons immediately and do not act on or justify irresponsible behavior. At the end of the day, it is far more beneficial to you not to give them ammunition to come after you in a court of law.

To say that it is dangerous out there is an understatement. We all must be careful and try to control our actions. After all, it only takes a few seconds to change our lives forever. Despite seeing red in the moment, we should do our best to keep our eyes on the bigger picture.