It's not me on Facebook so unfriend me

I am not on Facebook. I do not have a Facebook account, or whatever it is that allows me to be part of this hugely popular social networking site. I am issuing this disclaimer because it has come to my attention that there is somebody else on Facebook with the same name as mine.

Not being on Facebook, I did not give this fact much thought until I discovered that the person on Facebook with the same name as mine actually befriended a sister of mine living in the United States.

I do not know why the person on Facebook with the same name as mine befriended my sister. But I now shudder at the thought of the many scenarios that could arise if you deal with someone who is not who you think it is.

Of course, it is perfectly possible for someone to have exactly the same name as I have. But if there is such a person, I would like my friends and relations to know it is that person who is on Facebook, not me. 

So if, for whatever reason, anyone needs to get in touch with me, please know you cannot do so on Facebook because I am not there. The person who is on Facebook with a name the same as mine is not me. I appear on Facebook only as a post, citation, or quotation of others.

To my friends and relations (you all know who you are) who may have already connected and became “friends” with somebody with the same name as mine on the assumption that it is me, please “unfriend” me because, well, it is not me.

My name is not exactly unique. But it is far from being common either. So the chances of somebody having the same name is rather slim. Still I have not closed my mind to the possibility that somebody would come along answering to the same name as mine.

I have come to this realization many years ago when the fact that somebody has exactly the same name as mine was thrust upon my unsuspecting self in a most unusual and frightening manner.

Early in my journalistic career, I got a call from a judge, now since deceased, who asked me to come right over to his courtroom because — hold your breath — he was about to issue a warrant of arrest against a person who, except for the initials, had the same name as mine.

The judge said the person he was to issue a warrant against was involved in a stabbing incident up north. And while I was not the subject of the warrant, he cannot be sure the police would come looking for the only person they are likely to know with that name — me.

The judge explained that if that happens, and it already being late into Friday, chances are I would not be able to post bail and would have to spend the weekend in jail until I am able to sort things out.

So I almost literally flew to see the judge, who then told me to execute an affidavit that I and the person named in the warrant are “NOT” one and the same person. I went to see another judge, an uncle of mine, who quickly prepared the affidavit.

That affidavit was attached to the warrant of arrest issued against the person with the same name as mine. The issuing judge also went further to specify that the warrant was not to be served against me.

I don’t know if the authorities eventually arrested the man in the warrant. But for several years I had to carry those documents in my wallet, fearful the police might come for me, just for the heck of scaring one pesky columnist.