Children and the media

That's the title of the message by Pope Benedict on the occasion of the 41st World Communications Day celebrated just recently. Its subtitle is a challenge for education.

It's done in the Pope's signature style. The fluid, easy and generous flow of words, thoughts and logic actually embeds a very substantial content, a clear beam of light and a daring challenge.

I encourage everyone to give more attention to papal statements, because this time they are dressed in a more casual style, attuned to today's youthful sensibility, while the content remains orthodox, provocative and practical.

Thing is we cannot ignore this aspect of our duty to take care of children insofar as they are affected by the media. Children these days are not anymore taken care of only by parents, Church and school. The media also have become their surrogate parents, babysitters, teachers and even priests.

What they imbibe from the media can go deep into their soul, making a big contribution to the formation, for good or evil, of their character. Everything has to be done to ensure that the media leave a positive mark in the children. We cannot be naïve.

I appeal to parents to be more conscious of this duty, and to carry it out with more scientific rigor, without trading off the parental affection and understanding that are always indispensable. The responsibility falls on them first before it falls on anybody else.

Ideally, parents should talk among themselves and set out plans and strategies in this regard, being clear with the criteria and considerations to make, the goals to reach, the means and time-frame, etc., to use.

They have to know well what is objectively good and bad in the media these days, what are the particular characteristics and circumstances of each of their children, and what could be a prudent way of supervising them.

They should know the diet of shows and other materials the children are getting in the media. They should be most sensitive to how these things affect their children, quick to read the good and bad signs.

Are they helping the children, or are they spoiling them, converting them into some junkies who neglect their other duties-observing household schedules, doing chores, studying, praying, errands, etc.?

This is not a matter of control and domination. Effective parenting and upbringing of children always respects and fosters freedom, the kind that goes together always with responsibility. For freedom is not freedom unless it is accompanied by responsibility.

How good it would be if parents can do this task hands-on with their children! Parents should value highly the need to spend, even to 'waste' time with their children. The ideal is when they can talk with their children in a natural and spontaneous manner.

That way they can effectively monitor the children, and can give in a direct, immediate way the proper responses the situation may need at the moment.

Parents should have a way of knowing whether the children are learning how to be discerning and discriminating in the selection of shows, how they are living order and sense of priority amid the many things they have to do.

They should know whether the children are developing good habits, like studying and praying. Of course, example more than lectures works best here.

They should be active in giving suggestions to media outlets about the kind of shows that would be proper to their children. Especially now when there's trend for more participative media programming, they should let their ideas be known.

Educating the children on media is also educating the media on children. The media should be made to be more sensitive and responsive to the real needs for children to grow up properly.

At the moment there are shows, songs, printed materials, Internet sites that need to be purified, if not changed completely. It's amazing how some ditties, for example, with filthy lyrics, can still be played in the open with impunity.

Some people may have a good laugh, but these songs are clearly deforming, especially to the children. Parents, and any citizen, should take proper action.

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