Meet Jose Velarde

This is vintage Erap: he pours his heart out to a pretty woman, forgetting that cameras of ABS-CBN are rolling. In so doing, he inadvertently blurts out that he signed Equitable PCI Bank documents using the alias Jose Velarde.

Two days later, he throws a tantrum after the Sandiganbayan refuses to postpone his arraignment on the charge that he used an alias illegally. He dismisses his lawyers and moans that he’s ready for the gallows, complaining there’s no justice in this country.

I don’t know how a man who complains about the lack of hot water and no shower in his hospital detention room can be so eager to go to the lethal injection chamber. Since Joseph Estrada is already in the FAMAS Hall of Fame, the movie industry should create a new category for such superb acting.

At least Erap’s best friend, Fernando Poe Jr., has not lost his sense of decency. Amid all the media-inspired speculations (how we love to shoot ourselves in the foot) about FPJ seeking the presidency with Erap as his running mate in 2004, FPJ reportedly gave his standard reply: It’s easy to run, but what do we do if we win?

How you wish that just a little bit of FPJ’s mindset had rubbed off on Erap. We could have saved ourselves a lot of grief, and Erap would still be enjoying his women, his Petrus, his carousing and his millions. Or is it billions?

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You should feel for Erap’s lawyers. With a client like that, I would’ve quit a long time ago. Then again, with a client who pays as well as the man who signs using the name Jose Velarde, a hot-shot lawyer will probably stay on the team for as long as he can. How many people can afford the fees of a former chief justice, a former secretary of justice and the former city prosecutor of Manila? Only the man who used to give away P1 million as mah-jongg tip per senator, and mansions and BMWs to his women.

The most disturbing aspect of Estrada’s latest performance is that he actually looks like he believes he has done nothing wrong. Or at least he has done nothing that warrants his incarceration. This makes his performance so convincing, especially to his ever loyal fans, who always swallow everything he tells them.

His attitude seems to be: Everybody’s doing it, so why pick on me? And the answer, which he won’t like, is that he was the only one foolish and careless enough to leave a paper trail, with a slew of witnesses ready to testify against him. Ferdinand Marcos, whose IQ (that word again) must have been much higher than the current occupant of Malacañang, kept the paper trail so well hidden we still can’t get our hands on his wealth more than a decade after his death. Marcos’ wife was even smarter: she never signed anything. And none of the Marcoses ever made confessions on prime-time news.

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I’m betting people will be even more disturbed in the coming days by the administration’s response to Erap’s latest act, which could turn out to be the greatest performance of his life.

From Day One this administration has been open to the idea of sending Erap into exile. Erap might just get it, after his desperate gambit to appeal to public sympathy. Sure, the case is in the hands of the Sandiganbayan. But most people suspect our courts can be influenced by politics.

Even before his disastrous confession, political allies of the administration were already endorsing Erap’s medical treatment in the United States. Yesterday Metro Manila mayors and the head of the Metro Manila Development Authority joined the bandwagon, saying Erap could leave if he waived appearance at his court trial, which would continue in his absence.

What does this mean? Since Erap and his lawyers are no longer interested in participating in court proceedings, only government-appointed defense lawyers will be present at the trial. It’s highly likely that Erap will be convicted, but by that time he would be enjoying life in exile. After final conviction he will get a pardon, and then he can return and claim that his cases were all railroaded anyway. His relatives will seek public office and win. Everybody happy.

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Like EDSA Dos and Tres, Erap’s latest antics once again remind us of the weakness of our institutions. We’re headed for more trouble, more political wheeling and dealing, as the campaign for 2004 approaches.

I guess a year is too short to put Erap out of the national consciousness. Will someone please rescue the Burnham couple and Ediborah Yap already? We need to be distracted from the recurring nightmare of Jose Velarde.