The pleasure of growing old

I got the following eye-opening piece from Wyngard Tracy. I’m sure that he didn’t write it. Somebody must have forwarded it to him but he didn’t say who. He just requested Funfare to share it with readers. Here it is:

The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.

Old Age, I decided, is a gift.

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometimes despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don’t agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I’ve aged, I’ve become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I’ve become my own friend. I don’t chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn’t need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 a.m. and sleep until noon?

I will dance with myself to those wonderful tune of the ’60s and ’70s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will.

I will walk the beach in a swimsuit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.

They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten.

And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don’t question myself anymore. I’ve even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old it has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.

And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it).

May our friendship never come apart especially when it’s straight from the heart! May you always have a rainbow of smiles on your face and in your heart forever and ever!

Reader’s reaction

From Prof. R. Dinio (no address given):

Hi Ricky,

I am a faculty member of the College of Commerce at UST. I am writing to send a message to Rudy Fernandez who I know is going through a difficult phase in his life. When I was a very young instructor in the college, my first year of teaching, I was then Miss Peñalosa. Rudy became my student in Economics 1. He was a very likable guy, very young, dashingly handsome, very polite. When he walked the corridors, it was not just the girls who oohed and aahed. In the middle of the semester, he dropped out of school. He came to me to tell me of his decision. He didn’t have to do that, but he did. He said he was joining the movies full time. I watched how he grew to be a super action star. I never encountered him again; I just watched him on TV.

Since I heard of his illness I’ve been praying for him. I don’t think he remembers me, but please tell him I know he’ll hurdle this storm in his life. I’ll give you my cell number, (for him in case he has time to get in touch). I just want to tell him not to lose faith because God is good.

—Prof. R. Dinio

Cuaresma in Quezon

Here’s Fr. Joey Faller’s schedule for the rest of the Holy Week at the Kamay ni Hesus Shrine in  Lucban, Quezon:

• Today, Maundy Thursday, March 20 — Senakulo, 9 a.m. to 12 noon, and Washing of the Feet at 5 p.m. Exposition of the Holy Eucharist at Angel’s Hill, with background music and floral arrangement.

• Good Friday, March 21 —  Senakulo, 9 a.m. to 12 noon; Seven Last Words from 12 noon up to 3 p.m., with choirs in-between the Celebration of the Word of God; Veneration of the Cross, 5 p.m.; and private devotion starting at 7 p.m.

• Black Saturday, March 22 — Mary and St. John’s search for Christ’s tomb, featuring local talents, starting at 6 p.m.; Holy Mass at 10 p.m.; and Salubong (at Angel’s Hill) at 12 midnight.

• Easter Sunday, March 23 — Our Lord’s Resurrection (Healing Mass), 8 a.m. to 8 p.m.; and Worship and Joyful Celebration (with youths from Quezon), 8 p.m.

• Easter Monday, March 24  — Dedication of the Kamay ni Hesus Shrine with Healing Mass, 9 a.m.; and Dedication, 3 p.m.

What’s up?

• This piece of good news came from Funfare’s Big Apple correspondent Edmund Silvestre (news editor of The Filipino Reporter): Put on your dancing shoes, bell-bottom pants and Nik-Nik shirts for a night of (still hot and very much kick-ass) dancing with Archie Lacson & the Penthouse 7 gang of Marlyn Feliciano, Ray-An Fuentes, Rosie Garchitorena-Gan, Anna Garcia, Tito Garcia, Ronnie Henares, Sandy Hontiveros, Pipo Liboro, Mike Monserrat, Nini Ida Ramos, Gina Valenciano and some of their very special friends in a grand reunion on April 30 at the NBC Tent, Taguig City. (Note: For ticket inquiries, call Ticketworld at 891-9999 or the Manila Genesis at 721-4405 locals 105, 106 and 108, or 722-7821.)

• Oops #1: In some earlier editions of last Sunday’s (March 16) STAR, the birth year of 2008 Bb. Pilipinas-World Janina San Miguel was wrongly published as 1980. In fact, her birthday was Nov. 14, 1990. She’s turning 17.

• Oops #2: From readers Antonio Sy Jr. and Virgilio Luy: Grace Christian High School is located in Grace Village, near Sto. Domingo-Araneta Ave., Quezon City and not in Binondo (as erroneously mentioned in the Conversations with Ricky Lo feature last March 9 on  Dr. Vicki Belo and Dr. Hayden Kho who studied in that school).

• Little Asia’s two outlets (Tomas Morato, Quezon City; and Promenade, Greenhills, San Juan City) will stay open today until Easter Sunday.

(E-mail reactions at [email protected] or at [email protected])