How Chat touched my life

Rosa Rosal, Toni Rose Gayda, Coney Reyes and even Bibeth Orteza all planted the seed of faith in my heart in the early ’90s – but not necessarily within the fundamentals of the Roman Catholic Church, which was and still is the only religion that my family would allow me to embrace.

Then Chat Silayan came into my life.

I still remember the circumstances of our meeting. It was on the second week of April 1991. Prior to that, I had been desperately looking for her contact number because the Manunuri ng Pelikulang Pilipino was going to honor her father, the late Vic Silayan, as one of the Outstanding Actors of the Decade in the 14th Gawad Urian and I wanted her to accept the award on his behalf.

Days before the awards presentation, I suddenly saw her at the old Greenbelt lobby and ran after her. I introduced myself and told her about the award for her dad. She showed up at the awards presentation with her nephews and proudly accepted the trophy for the late great Vic Silayan.

More than a year later, respected PR lady Norma Japitana asked me to do a feature on Chat for this paper and I immediately said yes. We all met at the old Gene’s Bistro in Tomas Morato and Chat and I became friends after that. Campaigning for the re-election of her brother-in-law, former QC Mayor Jun Simon, I helped her one afternoon go around my neighborhood in La Vista distributing leaflets and knocking door-to-door at the house of people I knew. Driving for us was husband-to-be Mike Bailon, who that early was already devoted to Chat.

Shortly after, a major crisis occurred in my life. A writer for another paper had insinuated that I was on the take and was on the payroll of a major TV station. I wanted to sue for libel and Loren Legarda got me hooked up with a lawyer from the Siguion-Reyna Law Office. After several meetings with the lawyer, however, I was advised that my case might not stand in court because the article about me was written in the form of a blind item and I was not "identifiable" – even if all my friends in media were saying that it pointed to me and me alone.

Of course, I was very angry at that point. Toni Rose and Bibeth advised me not to get even anymore. Be a Christian and forgive. Although I got spiritual nourishment from them, I couldn’t grow as a Christian because I didn’t belong to a religious group. Then Chat suddenly called and asked me to attend her Catholic Charismatic group called Elim, which was founded by the father of former teen star Dondon Nakar. I went and got spiritually renewed.

Chat, Mike, Dondon with wife Candy (formerly Platon), our friend Lala, and I formed a group within that religious organization. On Mondays, we’d be attending Bible studies at the Elim headquarters in New Manila and on Tuesdays, we’d be at the prayer meeting at the San Carlos Seminary in Guadalupe. Of course, I was still closest to Chat, who was the one who brought me there in the first place. I’d tell her about my problems and she’d always find time for her "little brother." (For affairs of the heart, she’d promptly pass me on to Mike.)

Among all my female friends, Chat had a special place in my heart because she and my only (older) sister somehow had a physical resemblance. No, I’m not saying that my sister is also beauty queen material – especially now that she had grown so much horizontally (Peace, Ate!). However, they are of the same type – deep-set eyes, olive skin and all.

On the day of her wedding, I went to check on my sister in her bridal car and wearing a Steve de Leon Maria Clara outfit, the first thing she asked me was: "How do I look?" "You still look like my sister," I told her.

Less than 10 years later, on Dec. 30, 1992 at the St. James Parish in Alabang, I also went to check on Chat while waiting in her bridal car. Like my sister, she also chose to go Filipiniana and wore a Renee Salud terno with butterfly sleeves. When she saw me, she also asked me: "How do I look?" I thought I’ve been in that kind of a scenario years ago. It was like déjà vu. Or maybe all brides ask that question on their wedding day.

After the wedding, the couple settled in Chat’s old house in Moonwalk, Parañaque. Mike surely could have provided Chat and Victor (Chat’s son by a previous relationship – with an Italian director) a comfortable home. (As a bachelor, Mike lived with his family in a really huge house also in Parañaque.) But Chat loved that house – built from her earnings from show business.

Every so often, our group would drive to their house to have a taste of Chat’s pochero – the only pochero I ate because I don’t particularly like this dish, except when it is cooked by her.

When she got pregnant with her second child, Timothy, they transferred to a townhouse in Valle Verde to be near St. Luke’s Medical Center and we would spend time at their place.

Mike and Chat, however, are really southerners and eventually they moved back to the old Moonwalk home and I just got tired driving to Parañaque.

Eventually, I also became a fallen angel and dropped out of our religious organization – basically over an issue regarding The Last Temptation of Christ. Some of the elders advised me to just keep my mouth shut and I can never do that – so I left.

After that, I still kept in touch with Chat and Mike. Even if we didn’t see each other much during this time, in my heart of hearts, they were still my friends.

Then, I left for the US and during this time, Chat had given birth to Michaela, who is her mother’s spitting image. We now refer to her as "Little Chat." (Among family, Chat by the way was Charito, but to me, she will always be Chatty.)

In October of 1998, I went back for a visit here in the Philippines and I had the chance to speak to Chat on the phone. Ric Segreto, her former boyfriend (oh she was still very young then), had died in a very tragic vehicular accident in the EDSA-Makati flyover and I had so callously told her, "Had you married him, you’d be a widow by now." I sensed that she got uncomfortable because Mike is the jealous type. But Mike I swear is not unreasonable.

Shortly before Chat breathed her last, it was even Mike who arranged for his wife and Victor’s father to finally thresh things out between them. The Italian director flew over, had a long talk with Chat at the hospital and the two had what we call "closure."

Chat surely must have gone ahead of us peacefully – knowing that Mike would be a good parent to their kids, even Victor because Mike loves this boy (now 17 and a student at La Salle – Mike’s alma mater) like his own son.

Even with this little brother of hers’ – that’s me – she need not worry. I may not be part of a religious group today, but I am working on my spirituality. The seed of faith that she, among others, planted is still there.

The night before she was finally laid to rest, Nelson Canlas of 24 Oras asked me what I thought were the greatest achievements of Chat in this life. For a while, I thought of her Miss Universe third runner-up finish, her hosting stints in Suerte sa Siete and Student Canteen, her dramatic portrayals in The Chat Silayan Drama Studio and her movies with some of the great directors in cinema (Eddie Romeo, Celso Ad. Castillo, etc.).

But no, those showbiz accomplishments didn’t mean much anymore to Chat when she turned to the Lord.

What she strived to achieve was to be a good wife to Mike and a loving mother to their kids. But most of all, what she wanted was to be a good daughter to Christ. And now that she is with Him, she must now feel truly accomplished.