In sickness and in health

Rio Diaz was in Manila last month to celebrate her birthday and wedding anniversary with husband Charlie Cojuangco. She should be back in San Francisco by now for treatment, but while on vacation here, I had the chance to talk to her and to Charlie. Here’s my interview with them.

Now that you are flying back to San Francisco and due for another checkup, the many that you’ve been through, do you still feel nervous or scared about the results?

Rio: Not much anymore because I really just lift it up to the Lord. Kinakabahan nang kaunti, but then, I tell God I don’t like that feeling and I give it to Him and then I begin thinking about the fun things I do there with my friends and get to eat the food that I like there. After a while, I forget about the problem na.

With the ailment still there, what do you do to make things normal for all of you as a family?

Charlie: We just don’t think much about it. We just go about our business and so do the kids. They go to school and play with their friends. From our end, we make time for God and make time for the kids.

So it’s still the normal husband-wife setup with you two?

C: We still have our ups and downs and trials at kaunting problems, but we have a lot of good times together, really good times during our eight years together.

R: Nine years!

Do you quarrel less now - or more?

C: We never quarrel. We discuss. Hindi quarrel. We argue.

Have you had big arguments?

C: Meron din! But we try to settle everything ASAP so that it doesn’t get big – at para walang magtanim ng galit sa amin.

Where do the arguments usually begin?

C: From me.

R: No, that’s not true!

I can say this because Rio is my friend. (To Charlie) But isn’t Rio really a bit stubborn?

C: Bunso kami pareho.

How do you handle that?

C: It’s easy to communicate with Rio. Madali siyang intindihin. She’s easy to talk to. In fact, it’s because of her that I’ve mellowed in my ways. I’ve become even more understanding - although I’m still working on that - but that was because of her. She’s done a lot to change me for the better.

R: He’s very patient with me. Ako naman, I know when not to push him to the limit kasi tao lang naman ’yan.

How did you spend your wedding anniversary this time?

R: With God.

C: Quiet lang. Walang magarbo.

What was the most precious moment you’ve spent together?

C: I can’t pinpoint just one. Just watching TV and eating popcorn together, that’s one. That’s special to me. Basta magkasama kami, that’s good enough.

R: Ako din, I can’t pick just one particular moment. Of course, special talaga ’yung day when he proposed to me on his knees. But special to me are those days when I know that he’s there for me. At saka talaga, in sickness and in health, he’s there for me.

What about special moments in the kitchen since Rio cooks very well?

R: He cooks for me.

But you cook very well, Rio, and I know that.

R: Kasi, if you marry into a political family, may cook ’yan and you don’t want to compete in the kitchen. Besides, Charlie is really the better cook between the two of us.

As a wife, do you think you still have shortcomings?

R: Oh yeah. You always think you can still be a better wife. But what I want is to be a spiritual friend to him, too.

When was the last time you said ‘I love you’ to each other?

R: Kagabi.

C: Probably last night.

Who is the more malambing?

R: Siya. Pero hindi siya marunong mambola. In fact, he speaks his mind and that sometimes becomes a problem when we are with other people. I kick him under the table and then he’ll say, Aray! Bakit ba? Siya talaga, if he says something, he really means it.

Do you plan to have any more kids?

R: No. I don’t think that‘s going to be good for me. And we have three na and he’s my baby.

This is a rather sensitive question. (To Charlie) When Rio got sick, didn’t you wish, at least in your mind, having married somebody who was healthier?

C: No. And from my end, I told myself, kung siya kaya niya, kakayanin ko ito. I will always be here to support her.

R: The hardest part lang talaga is with the kids. But I said to myself, instead of crying, instead of being sad, I’ll spend better time with them, teach them about God. I’m giving them a better foundation and I always tell them there’s no reason for them to be angry with God because of this. And whatever happens to them, for as long as Jesus is alive in their hearts, they will be okay. And I’m glad that there’s Charlie to watch over them and he loves them very much.

There must be something good that came out from this (ailment)?

R: In a way, cancer brings in a lot of blessings kasi you can say to your loved ones everything na nararamdaman mo - your feelings and affection for them . . . things that you will never tell them when you are okay.