Political correctness be damned

Now that the world is baffled and even scared by all the complex political realities and evils everywhere, it is but natural for a superhero – or superheroine – to appeal to the collective imagination if only for a couple of hours or so of fun, thrills and make-believe. Darna, probably the most successful local movie franchise, zooms in and out of local theaters every few years. And while they are still arguing over who will play Darna next – Judy Ann Santos, Jolina Magdangal, Ara Mina, or Assunta de Rossi? – Neo Films has offered as one of the six entries in the current Manila Film Festival the latest superheroine to fly the Manila – and Quezon City – skyline, Super B.

Truth is, there isn’t much difference between Super B and Darna. Both have alter egos that are your average ordinary girls; Darna has Narda, and Super B has Bi, whose family owns a rolling carinderia. Both are transformed into magical creatures with super powers that come in handy when crime is in progress. Yes, Darna, Batman, Spider-Man, and now Super B are the nemeses of all criminals (though not of the kind that are in high places in government – only the obvious ones).

Super B is born out of the box-office success of a similar character named Booba, both played by the shapely Rufa Mae Quinto whose screen persona carries word associations that start mostly with the letter B: big, brassy, brobdingnagian, booboo, boba, boobs, booby, breasts, brassiere. The basic difference between Darna and Super B is that the latter is funny and sexier, though both are supposed to be unaware of their sexiness. They fly and beat the daylights out of evildoers in skimpy attire – boots and bikini, so that while children may admire their powers and daring, older men may admire something else.

The whole thing may not exactly please feminists (the director of both Booba and Super B is a woman, Joyce Bernal, if it is any consolation to them), but the concept of both Booba and Super B throws all political correctness to the wind. Make fun of the physically challenged? The history of local showbiz is replete with that. How about picking on the hare-lipped? Or what to call the funny male lead who talks like one of those so-called mediums allegedly possessed by the Sto. Niño? Why, name him Lord, short for Lordino.

Lord is Marvin Agustin, on loan from his mother studio by Viva. Not too tall, but not too short either, Marvin is Bi’s determined suitor, forever pushed to marriage by his domineering manghuhula mom (Marissa Delgado). Lord is funny also because, like those tiny Sto. Niño icons, he dresses up in velvet and he sports this Mayor Sanchez hairdo (disheveled wig). One downside: His Tiny Tim voice is cute for a while, but repeated again and again becomes monotonous. In any case, everytime somebody calls out Marvin by that monicker, Lord!, religious zealots may be upset.

Still, I challenge those who protest Super B’s political incorrectness, especially people with, uh, hangups, to keep still and remain unaffected by all the comic goings-on and gags.

One joke – though maybe unintended – Bi’s great crush Troy Montero is a newspaper reporter. That’s a joke (you don’t find an animal of such glamor and beauty – okay, male beauty – in any newspaper office in Manila). The other joke about Troy – no, I will not spoil the fun by revealing it in this review. So if not ogling at Troy, Bi is always fending off Marvin’s well-meaning kakulitan (marriage proposal, actually) or, as Super Bi, crushing the bad elements of society.

Arch-villains are a pair of beautiful but devious recording artists and product endorsers called the Flower Pot Girls (the deliciously wicked Melanie Marquez and Mylene Dizon), a corruption of the cartoon characters Powder Puff Girls. Melanie and Mylene are super-popular pop icons who are in fact false idols and aliens who want to mesmerize and subjugate all the children in the world starting with the children in Manila (that’s a lot of kids).

For a time, these mean sisterly duo succeed like Pied Pipers. Hilarity erupts some more when Super B pursues FPG not by running or flying but all three tumbling like the Matrix warriors in an incredible chase that takes them to the famous landmarks in Manila: Rizal Park, Liwasang Bonifacio, the CCP, Fort Santiago, etc. (It’s reminiscent of that sequence in Juan Tamad Goes to Society made in the early ’60s, where Adorable Liwanag looks for her brother Juan and calls out to him barefoot in such scenic spots as the Banaue Rice Terraces, the Tagaytay hills overlooking Taal Volcano, Mayon Volcano, etc.)

It’s all fun and games until Super B soars into the Cubao skyline, and the movie soon falters. Local moviemakers should have known better than to show crude special effects, especially now that Manila folk are quite used to the technical marvels of Hollywood extravaganzas – for about the same admission price, too (Super B just after Spider-Man? Kawawa naman si Super B). But that’s only as far as SFX is concerned. All in all, it’s generally a fun, rambunctious laughfest, a worthy festival entry for the entire family, well-made and lustily-performed by a good cast especially Rufa Mae, Melanie and Mylene. And when you think the movie’s over, don’t leave. Rufa makes a tearful plea right before the closing credits; how hysterically funny, how insane.