Jodi Sta. Maria on family wounds: ‘Healing is our responsibility’

MANILA, Philippines — As a mom in real life, Jodi Sta. Maria could easily relate to the issues tackled in the family dramedy “Ganito, Ganyan, Ganoon,” now streaming on Netflix, particularly the themes of healing and forgiveness.

Co-written and directed by Cholo H. Laurel, the film follows the story of Jodi’s character, Joanne or “Jo,” an independent TV writer whose carefully rebuilt life unravels when her estranged mother, Paz (played by Agot Isidro), resurfaces after 27 years — with a secret that changes everything.

“What would it take for a mother to leave her only child just like that? At first, when I was reading the script, mas para akong nag-focus kay Paz, I was like, ‘Why Paz, why?’ But we cannot judge her especially if we don’t know her real story, what she went through and the wounds she carries,” Jodi told The STAR during Netflix Philippines’ media launch at Casa Buenas in Newport Mall. The event was also attended by direk Cholo and cast members Agot, Gabriel Lazaro and Ruby Ruiz.

“There are times na yung mga wounds na meron tayo ang tendency is pina-pass on lang din naman natin sila doon sa, let’s say, sa susunod na generation or sometimes to the people closest to us. So it’s always good to say that whatever general traumas you have, you have to take it upon yourself and say, ‘It ends with me,’ so that I don’t get to pass it on to my children. I don’t pass it on to the people closest to me. Yung sharp edges ko won’t hurt other people and healing is our responsibility,” she continued.

Filming “Ganito, Ganyan, Ganoon” turned into a “therapy session” for Jodi, as she and the director would discuss the heavy scenes to help her better understand the character and refrain from judging her. “It has been helpful,” she said.

The family dramedy follows the story of Jodi’s character, Joanne or Jo, an independent TV writer whose carefully rebuilt life unravels when her estranged mother, Paz (played by Agot), resurfaces after 27 years — with a secret that changes everything.

Photos courtesy of Netflix

Beyond its “authenticity and fearlessness in exploring such familiar family dynamics,” the film also delves into the complexities of forgiveness, raising the question of whether one can truly find closure without ever receiving it.

As direk Cholo elaborated, “(The film) prescribes that we have to resort to proper communication. It requires only that. That you talk. That you expose the wounds. It does not prescribe you to do anything: it does not prescribe you to forgive, to say that this is good, that it is bad — no. It just tells you that this is the Filipino family; these are what relationships are like. You decide.”

“There is no absolute right or wrong. There is good, there is bad, and there is what is real. And then you piece together why things happen the way they do. We all have our own stories and our own reasons for being the way we are. At the end of the day, we are all only human,” he added.

Jodi poses for a groufie with her fellow cast members.

Agot agreed, saying that “peace” is only possible when it comes from within — from oneself: “I just turned 60, mas ngayon, parang for everyone, ayaw na natin ng bagahe sa buhay. Naiisip mo na that the healing and forgiveness ay nanggagaling sa sarili. It’s really an inner work.”

For Jodi, who describes herself as non-confrontational in real life, forgiveness begins with processing and acknowledging her emotions.

“I acknowledged what I felt. It’s not as if something is done to me, all of a sudden, ‘OK na, sige na, I forgive.’ I sit down with my feelings and emotions if I feel hurt, betrayed, disappointed or whatever,” she admitted.

“After that, I will have to be proactive in forgiving because forgiveness hindi naman dun sa ibang tao eh. You forgive a person para sa sarili mo, so that you let go of the emotional hook that that person has over you. It doesn’t even mean that you are minimizing the pain, hindi din yung parang sinasabi mo na maliit na bagay lang yung nangyari sayo.”

Agot, Jodi and direk Cholo.

Meanwhile, Jodi also opened up about how she explained her “blended family” setup to her son, Thirdy, whom she shares with ex-husband Pampi Lacson. She described their conversation as a “hearty, moving, humbling and lengthy conversation,” although she chose not to go into details.

“To be honest, I just told myself that I will take the cue from my child. The moment na magtanong siya about the situation, I will tell him because that will give me a clue and a signal that he is ready. Because when a child asks you na, it means that he is already ready for answers,” she said.

Jodi and Pampi tied the knot in 2005 and called it quits in 2011. Their marriage was eventually annulled. Pampi now has two children with actress Iwa Moto.