The SWS menace

I still can't get over last week's news, a headline that read: "SWS: PNoy gets 'very good' satisfaction ratings from Yolanda victims." When I first saw it on my Facebook newsfeed, I thought it was one of those Adobo Chronicles or Professional Heckler satires. I mean, in the name of all that is good and holy and right, it could not have been a legit news article, it read like sarcasm at best. That is until I saw that it was a link to the GMA news website. What crock!

When I read it out loud to the friends I was having dinner with, everyone, like a rehearsed speech choir performance, shouted in unison—"WHAT?! Ah, kadakong binuang ana oi!" The thing is, the people I was with, all of them were actively involved in the relief operations in Leyte, so they know how it was and is out there. They also know the sentiments of the victims, of the families of those who've perished, many of whom have remained unaccounted for. Last I heard, they've stopped counting casualties, and how convenient this is for PNoy who strategically lowered the expected death toll, as if a lower count is equated to 'a job well done' for him. Sus, "pogi points" addict.

I have more than thirty relatives who were survivors of Yolanda, and none of them, absolutely none, and all their other survivor/refugee friends and neighbors would give PNoy a "very good" mark, not even a satisfactory rating. On the contrary, all of them lambast him with a passion. The same goes for the foreign aid workers and volunteers, many of whom we coordinated and touched base with. None of them have heard any praise for PNoy in the ground, and they concur with the prevailing sentiment in the affected areas. So what the hell is SWS saying? Do they take us for fools?

"Although he has received criticism from some parties for his administration's response to super typhoon Yolanda (Haiyan), President Benigno Aquino III got 'very good' satisfaction marks from victims of the typhoon, according to a survey by Social Weather Stations.

"SWS said this was the finding of its survey last Dec. 11 to 16, where Yolanda victims — which comprised 13 percent of Filipino families — gave Aquino a "very good" +54 net satisfaction rating.

'The December 2013 survey found higher satisfaction ratings for President Benigno 'Noynoy' Aquino III among victims of Yolanda compared to those who were not victimized by the super typhoon,' the survey said."

Unbelievable. Amusing. Infuriating. Insulting. I have long since been appalled by the brazenness of SWS in peddling their lies to help control and manipulate the political climate and meet the Aquino Administration's selfish ends, shifting public opinion through conditioning, no, brainwashing. But of all their stunts, of all the manipulated survey results that have left me and many stupefied, breathless at the bullshit they desperately shove down our throats, this indubitably takes the cake!

If it's mere pa-pogi for PNoy, fine, they can have it. It was PNoy's Cojuangco relatives who set up SWS in the first place, so never mind fairness and honesty and transparency, they can continue being the liars that they are, topnotch mind controllers and Yellow sorcery wizards. But this, this is the biggest slap to the faces of countless victims and casualties of the strongest storm in the world's recorded history! People died for crying out loud, yet they have no qualms exploiting the situation.

"It is gratifying that those who suffered greatly appreciate what their president and government have done to ease their pain and alleviate their plight, despite the shortcomings and challenges still being hurdled," Presidential Communications Operations Office head Herminio "Sonny" Coloma Jr. told GMA News.

Tsk. I therefore conclude, SWS is one of the worst things to happen to our country in contemporary history, a certified menace. If I happen to bump into Mahar Mangahas, SWS president, God help me. No, God help him. I may not be able to control myself and give him a good dressing down, propriety be damned!

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In other news:

A peace treaty that could lead us to war. Oxymoronic, yes, and only because we choose leaders who are, well, moronic.

And the choosing of leaders happens years apart, and in between we keep ourselves busy soaked on escapist, aspirational, and rehashed soap opera plotlines, or transfixed on the adventures and misadventures of artistas, any and all, celebrities big or small.

Occasionally we get distracted by a political scandal, diverted by a disaster, and get riled up wanting to call them leaders to task. Only to revert to the sad and sorry status quo — soap and showbiz and sensational news (Shet!) — after a news cycle or two given our attention span akin to a goldfish.

And yet we still get the shock of our lives that we're f*cked up?

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So what now of Napoles, the cheap and substandard bunkhouses built by the PNoy government for victims of Haiyan, or interventions made to gaps in disaster response, if at all?

What of the purported oil found off the coast of Cebu, Meralco's overcharging, the malicious manipulation of SWS and Pulse Asia surveys, and other matters of consequence?

One day is more than enough. Three or more days is a disease!

When personal lives of showbiz people are concerned, practice this mantra by saying it over and over again: "I don't give a shit!"

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On a lighter note:

The best feng shui advice I could give on this very first day of the Year of the Wooden Horse? Block or unfriend (online or offline) those fake friends who've never been truly happy for you, people who aren't mature enough to respect a plurality of views, or anyone who judges you and makes pakialam what you do.

I guarantee, it should be quite a liberating experience. On top of that, you rid your life of unnecessary bad vibes.

If not, pabuthi ug Super Lolo! Piti!

Xin ni kway lok!