Where do you fix your gaze?

When Jesus heard that John [the Baptist] had been arrested, he withdrew to Galilee (Matthew 4:12).

Why did Jesus “withdraw” to Galilee? Was this “withdrawal” an attempt to escape? If it were, this surely would have been understandable. If imprisonment awaited the prophet, if persecution and an eventual execution were the fate of those who tried to speak the truth and challenge the status quo, who would not be tempted to run away? But Galilee was the territory of Herod Antipas who had John arrested. It would have been the wrong place to seek refuge. This was not a retreat. This was Jesus diving straight into the jaws of danger. If we want more proof, we need only look at what Jesus did when he reached Herod’s bulwark: From that time on, Jesus began to preach and say, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Mt 4:17).

Why did Jesus not just keep quiet? Why did he still pursue the life of a prophet knowing – from the experience of his very own cousin – what would come of it? How could he face certain peril and still run towards it?

Jesuits in their first year of novitiate go through the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, an intense 30 days of wrestling with yourself and your God. Around the third week, we are asked to contemplate Jesus and his passion. I remember entering that stage of the retreat and being asked by my spiritual director, “Are you ready to walk with Jesus all the way to the cross?” In my prayer, I saw the whip that scourged Jesus, the crown of thorns placed on his head, the people spitting on his wounds, and the nails that would soon pierce his hands and feet. Simon of Cyrene may have stayed with Jesus to help him carry his cross, but I wanted to run away. I told my director, “No, I’m sorry, I do not think I can walk all the way to the cross.” And my director told me, “That’s because your eyes are on the cross. Do the prayer exercise again, but this time, fix your gaze on Jesus. Then see how far you are able to walk with him.” I did as I was told, and with my eyes just on Jesus, the whip, the crown of thorns, the spitting, and the nails… well, they did not disappear. But somehow, they were made bearable. I was surprised by how far I wanted to walk with Christ, and I knew this was not because of my bravery (it was in spite of my lack of it). It was because as I fixed my gaze on Christ, he fixed his gaze on me. And the 30 days of wrestling with God became 30 days of slowly falling in love with the Lord.

When Jesus “withdrew” to Galilee, his eyes were fixed not on the prison bars and the chains that held John the Baptist, not on Herod’s soldiers, not on anything else but the Father’s eyes. Jesus was running right into danger, yes, but he was also pursuing the Father’s mission for him. The withdrawal to Galilee was a withdrawal into the Father’s embrace.

I know mothers who leave their families to work as domestic helpers abroad. Their eyes are fixed not on the loneliness, not on the possible abuse, and certainly not on the dollars they can earn. Though these are in the periphery, their gazes are directed on their children being able to go to school.

I know students who burn the midnight oil, studying into the wee hours of the morning though tired from a part-time job that helps pay their tuition. Their eyes are fixed not on the Bundy clock and not just on the printed words and handwritten notes already swimming before them. Their gazes are directed on the parents and siblings they will be able to help once they graduate.

The eyes of these mothers and students must be fixed on Jesus, too, because many times the people for whom they toil do not show their gratitude. Yet these mothers and students continue to walk the way of the cross. I am sure Jesus’ eyes must be fixed on them, too.

When you face trial and adversity, where do you fix your gaze? And when there is success and prosperity, is your gaze still fixed on him who is the reason for your blessings? Or do your eyes begin to stray?

One final challenge: Pope Francis begins his first apostolic exhortation with the words, “The joy of the gospel fills the hearts and lives of all who encounter Jesus.” Joy must also be in the hearts of those who fix their gaze on God. Can you face problems, hardship, and even peril with joy? Jesus must have been filled with joy and not just trepidation as he began proclaiming the coming of the Kingdom in Galilee. He definitely would not have been in the category of people who look like they just came from a funeral – the sourpusses our Pope describes. If, as we fix our gazes on Jesus, we can radiate the joy of Easter even though we are going through Lent, then we can truly say, in the words of our Gospel today, “The people who sit in darkness have seen a great light; on those dwelling in a land overshadowed by death, light has arisen” (Mt 4:16).