Love, love, love

It's almost my deadline and I'm still not sure if I should be writing about love, L-O-V-E, love, one of the most talked about and divisive of topics among friends. But I don't want to give my editor, Debbie, a headache, so what the heck, here it goes.

I've had my fair share of heartaches, each one leaving an indelible lesson I try to live by and share whenever my counsel is sought. Throughout the years, I've learned that the degree of mutual honesty and efforts to constantly communicate between two people is directly proportional to the success rate of a relationship. I've also come to know that we should never take people, and the moments we share with them, for granted. Corre-spondingly, if you've forgiven, make sure these sins of the past never crop up in any fu-ture argument.

And the biggest realization of all: I've discovered that love and pain are identical twins, sharing the same DNA. Ergo, if you say you're ready to love, be sure you're ready for the pain that almost always comes with it; they're like a package deal, a combo meal.

Writing about these things now feels awkward because words, especially mine, have the tendency to reduce the experience into an academic discussion, and very seldom do words, especially in such limited space, succeed in containing and expressing what could be the most powerful of human expressions and experiences.

Two Sundays ago, as I was prostrate in prayer after communion at the Pedro Calungsod Shrine (the Archbishop's Palace) where we always hear Mass, I contemplated on love. I conversed with God as I would converse with a close friend, sharing with Him both my joys and sorrows relating to this most important aspect of my earthly existence.

And amidst recounting to God how I've been 'faithfully single' the past two years to whom I'd consider to be the great love of my life, and how unconditional love can be very fulfilling, I suddenly found myself blurting out something I never thought I'd be saying. "Lord, give me the strength and the courage to stop being so stubborn and to stop waiting, to move on, to just stay open, to be open for just about anything and anyone who comes my way."

You might be wondering why I'm sharing something very private (my conversa-tions with God), but something in me simply wants to write about my encounter and how it's changed my perspective almost instantaneously.

After I ended my relationship two years ago, and having committed to wait faith-fully even when I was not obligated to, I've since learned to be more patient. And that is a big deal for someone severely impatient like me. Then again, while the wait (and the pain attached to it)-pathetic for some, and romantic for others-is something I don't regret, and frankly, quite proud of, it too must come to an end.

This doesn't mean I've stopped loving, or that I love less-it's just that I've made the crucial choice to free myself for the "great anything," allowing the love to grow, to mature, to expand, to learn and relearn, and to soar to greater heights and discover the beauty of limitless possibilities.

Someone told me that when we allow love to grow wings, sometimes, just some-times, it might even fly its way back home. Whatever. For now, I've decided to enjoy the journey and see what happens.

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Tonight's The Bottomline with Boy Abunda: A year after, controversial Maguin-danao Governor Toto Mangudadatu answers tough questions and other pressing issues on the 'Maguindanao Massacre' and its ongoing trial.

Watch it tonight after Banana Split on ABS-CBN. Replay telecast on the ABS-CBN News Channel (ANC), Sunday, 1:30 pm.

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